


Shroud. [joshler]

by orphan_account



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Bottom Josh, Bottom! Josh, Bratty Josh, Cannibalism, Consensual Underage Sex, Depression, Disturbing Themes, Drugs, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Feel free to comment anything you want cause I love em, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gore, Heavy Angst, I add tags and characters gradually, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jail, Josh is 14-16, LGBTQ Themes, LSD, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Self-Harm, Smut, Top Tyler, Top! Tyler, Tyler is 19-21, Tysh, Zombie Apocalypse, joshler - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-18
Updated: 2017-11-06
Packaged: 2018-10-07 07:43:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 37
Words: 39,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10355505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: [heavily inspired by The Last Of Us, it's a excellent game, go check it out.]Josh wouldn't really consider himself 'the typical teenager'.His family is broken apart. His father neglects him and his mother by focusing on his aircrafts, and his mother is in a coma.Josh believes that he's in the worse possible situation, making a huge mistake, and about to kill his father.At that moment, dead bodies begin to rise, and Josh is left in fear.And Tyler?Tyler's stuck in jail.





	1. Fungus Boy

**_"You can't be in there."_ **

  
"Why can't I, son?"

 

"It's broken."

"Why would it be broken?"

  
".... I broke it."

  
"Why would you break it?"

  
"... you haven't done anything but leave me. You can't be there. You really can't."

  
"It's too late now. How'd you break it?"

"I smashed the controls, and... um..."

"...?"

"The engine."

 

"... the engine, you say..?"

".... y-....yes...."

The poor boy's voice began to shrivel up, and shake.

".. my, the engine is the only thing keeping me in the air right now. You can't be saying that you..-"

"I-...I broke the engine, dad...! I'm so sorry...! I'm so so sorry...! I should have told yo-" he was now blubbering over his words, tears rapidly dropping to the cold, marble floor, his cries echoing throughout the hallway.

"I.. how'd you smash it...?"

"I tried to fix it... but..."

It was quite blue, and dark.  
The only lights left were from the small boy's cellphone, and the signs above his head, showing the locations of restroom, or the cafeteria.  
"Y-...you won't make it...! It's my fault... mom will hate me forever, and you'll hate me forever, you'll either be hurt and disabled for the rest of your life, or you'll be dead..! I'll be killing both of my parents-" he choked.

"Joshua, please don't cry. I'll make it out alive, I promise."

 

  
Josh sobbed into his hands as he was beside his lifeless mother, with only a heartbeat and a working, but meaningless brain.  
The heart rate monitor emitted sounds and colors of green and darkness.  
It was pitch black outside.  
His father was somewhere in the air, on an aircraft, and about to drop.

 

 

Suddenly, the air went red.  
Sirens were blaring outside his window.  
The tv was flickering.  
An explosion.  
Just outside, about 20 to 40 blocks away, tucked between the dark buildings and towers.  
It was large, glowing red, and probably shattered all the glass near that area.

Josh stood up instantly.

  
".... huh....?"

People were evacuating the building.  
Pushing through the many people running to the emergency exit, Josh pushed open the entrance, curious.  
People were screaming and crying.  
What's going on?

As he walked, flashes of him smashing the aircraft suddenly popped up in his head.  
He shuddered as he walked towards the heat.

He remembered holding the cold metal of the crowbar so well, bashing it against the engine, grunting, and screaming in anger and agony.

By the time Josh stopped, the engine looked like crumbs of metal and wires.  
He dropped to the floor on his knees, dropping the crowbar.  
_"N...no... nonononono... I gotta fix this... I-I.. I gotta fix this....!" He murmured deliriously_.

  
Josh's slender, fragile fingers weren't able to fix the broken aircraft completely.  
They had a mind of their own, fumbling and twitching, desperately trying to fix it.

 

A wave of heat crashed against Josh's body.  
He shielded his face with his forearm, squinting his eyes.

"... who... who's there..?"

He heard a nearby growling sound.

"..Hello...?"

  
He noticed two people on the ground.  
One laying lifelessly on the pavement, and the other hovering above it, disgusting gnawing at it.

".... I.. what is that...?"

  
The woman turned her head, her face messed up and grey, coated with a gross drippy red liquid.  
Blood.  
Her pupils were white, and her body was wounded everywhere.  
The man below her was dead, his stomach was eaten out.  
Josh stopped.  
His heartbeat kicked up, beating out of his chest.  
His eyes were wide, and suddenly, he felt death rush over him.

He couldn't move.

  
The woman began to slowly crawl over toward him.  
She got up and start to run towards him.

Josh let out a gasp, as the woman grabbed onto his shoulders, croaking and fighting against his grip, attempting to push her away.  
"N-no... go away...!!" Josh tried to kick her, but she wouldn't move away.

"H-help me....! Help me......"  
Her face was getting closer to the crook of his neck.

Her disturbing body was extremely close.  
Josh began to cry.

  
Suddenly, he heard a gunshot.  
The woman crumpled to the ground, head leaking with blood.

Josh dropped to the floor, shaking rapidly, and crying like a baby.  
He mumbled incoherent things crazily, tears rushing down his cheeks.  
He was frightened.  
Way too frightened.

A soldier walks up to him, holding a shotgun.  
Josh shivered, as he looked up at him, unable to see the man's face.  
He inched away, tears still falling.  
"..p...papa.... I'm scared.... please don't leave me here... I'm sorry..." Josh's chest inflated and then deflated, twitching like he was insane.  
The soldier walked closer.  
Josh fell on his back.  
"N-no... 'm scared... 'm... s-...scared....."

  
"Listen, how old are you?"

"......just turned... fourteen..." Josh hiccuped, and sobbed.  
"What's your name?"  
"... J...osh..ua..."

  
"You came from the hospital, right...? You should have stayed there."

  
The soldier turned around, seeing more of the dead walking towards them.

"Fuck, we gotta run."

 

 

"Open up...!! Please... I've got a kid in my arms!"

  
"Come on... you shitheads." He muttered.

  
The door creaked open.

".. Joshua...! D-did he leave..?" One of the nurses exclaimed, watching the man put the poor boy on the couch.

The soldier soon left the building, and Josh was taken down to the basement, hiding.

A few weeks later, the hospital doors opened once again, and the city was cleared, for now.

 

  
And the few survivors in the city stayed in that little area for the rest of the year.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Take that candy out of your mouth, cunt." Audrey, a girl who often carried knives in her pockets, pointed to the lollipop in Josh's mouth, towering over him.  
He hadn't gotten any taller then when the whole virus began, but he grew to be more snarky and bratty.  
"I don't wanna." He spat.  
"You think you're strong, don't you? You can't protect yourself, or anyone for shit. You'll either get eaten apart by those fucking retards, or kidnapped and raped by some fucked up people. You really think you can talk to me like that?"  
"Just leave me alone, hag."

The broad punched him across the face, and grabbed his collar, holding him up effortlessly.  
"If I ever see you on this pavement again, I'll kill your ass."

Josh felt his eyes grow warm and wet, yet he struggled.  
"Wanna cry? Wanna cry for your mother or somethin'? You think she's gonna come running?" She sneered.  
"You're a fucking twink who can't carry himself on his own legs. I doubt that you'll get killed by a zombie. You're probably gonna become a sex slave." Audrey dropped him to the ground, and he wiped his mouth, slightly dripping with drool. He glared at the tall bitch, with her brown hair choppy around her shoulders, and her clothing all ragged, just like everyone else's in this area.

"..." Josh wanted to say something.  
Something smart.  
Something that stump her, but he couldn't barely think of anything.  
"Stuck? You're just looking up at me now. You literally have nowhere to go. Your mother should really just die. She's in a coma. She'll never wake up, you know that, right?"

"Don't talk about my mother like that, you filthy stealer..!! I know you! You take food from innocent people! You're no good... you don't deserve to be alive right no-"

Josh earned himself a kick to the face.  
"... and I heard you destroyed your father's stupid little plane. He's dead for sure, by now. And it's all your fault."  
Josh looked up, a wave of desperation crashing onto his bleeding face.

 

  
"And yet you think you're doing the good. No one is. Fuck off."


	2. Rusty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [gore warning]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes,,, I'm not really the best at writing, so if it seems really messy, I'm so sorry rip  
> Art is more like my thing instead of writing y'know

"Put your hands up in the air. Right where I can see them."

Tyler lugged his body out of the car, and held his arms up, legs slightly apart.

"You fucker. I could tell it was you. Escaping jail will just get you caught, and with a bigger punishment. You know that, right? Get your ass in here."  
The police officer grabbed Tyler's arms and shoved them together.  
It almost felt as if Tyler didn't resist.  
He roughly pushed the man into the backseat, making him slightly fall over on his side.  
He slammed the door behind him.

As the two drove through the dark and abandoned road, Tyler began to drift off into a despicable wonder.

 

When Tyler was seventeen, his father was an alcoholic.  
His mother rarely visited, and he was left alone at home to do whatever.  
Tyler wasn't a very happy child.  
He'd get hurt often, and get even more hurt as a punishment for being stupid.  
In fact, Tyler was stupid, pathetic, and tired.

 

  
He remembered the heat.  
It was... August.   
Right?

_Tyler was stuck carrying boxes for shipment, bringing them from one place to another._   
_His job made him sick._   
_He could barely support himself._   
_He was just some lost kid._

  
_Tyler remembered it being around 3:00 am when he finally made it home._   
_He groggily claimed the stairs, unlocked the door, and slowly went in._

  
_"What the fuck, man? What took you so goddamn long?!" His father's breath reeked of alcohol, some sandwich he hate earlier today, and cigarettes._   
_He grabbed Tyler's hair, yanking his body down and sideways, pulling him around easily with his hairy arm._   
_Tyler grit his teeth._   
_The man tossed the tall boy away, yet he didn't fall over._   
_"Whatever. I'm going to bed. You better give me that money. I own you."_

_Tyler stood there._   
_His eyes sore, his body tired,_

_He didn't realize he was walking around outside._

_On the yellow, dried grass, he noticed it._

_An axe._

 

  
_At this point, Tyler frozen still._   
_He wants to go home._   
_Something's pulling him towards the weapon, making him sick._   
_The brown rust near the wooden handle made it dull, and old looking._   
_No matter how much he tried, his mind begged for refusal._   
_His legs slowly inched towards the object, almost gleaming in the spotlight of the lamppost, like a eager child, awaiting praise and usefulness._

_He gave in._   
_Violently ripping the axe from the ground, he stormed back to his apartment._   
_Tossing open the door, the sound of anger washing through the whole building._   
_He stomped his way to his father's bedroom._

_"... What the fuck do you think you're doi-"_

_Tyler yelled in agony as he bashed the sharp side of the steel, right against his father's face._   
_He ignored the scream of pain, crushing it against the disgusting man he had to see as a father._

_When Tyler finally calmed down, all he saw before him was a dark, muddy red, and a broken figure._   
_Blood was all over the sheets._   
_On the axe._   
_And on Tyler._   
_He noticed the disconnected limbs of the body._

_And so he began to weep._

 

 

  
_Tyler didn't bother cleaning anything up._   
_He just walked straight to the police station, knowing what was in store._

 

"Hey."

"Hey!"

Tyler turned his head grumpily.

"I heard you killed someone."

Tyler turned away once again, facing the same direction he was facing in the beginning.

"Hah. Think you're so damn tough?"

Tyler lowered his head, staring at the floor, tiredly.

"Why don't you ever talk, man? Do you have problems or something?"

"God, you're annoying." Tyler grumbled.

"There we go. You're finally saying something. Say, what's your name? I'm Brendon."

"... Tyler.."

"Nice to meet you. But I hope you don't just kill random people, I don't wanna die yet."

"I'm not a serial killer." Tyler murmured.

 

"You're still a murderer."

 

  
Tyler turned around, looking through the cell bars, seeing the guy, his dark hair, and large eyes, and a huge forehead.

".. fuck you."

Brendon let out a loud laugh.  
"You're gonna have to deal with me for a long time, sweet cheeks. Too bad for you, I guess."

Tyler escaped after two years in jail.

 

 

 

 

  
"You don't talk much, do you? You rarely ever speak."

"...."

"I'll be honest with you, I wouldn't expect someone like you to escape. What's your IQ? How'd you do it?"

"... not talking, huh? You're insane, you know that? Chopping up your father into bits. You must've hated him."

"... well, it doesn't even matter anyways, so-"

Suddenly, somebody rammed into the car.

  
"Oh fuck."

It was so dark out.  
The police officer stopped the car, and walked right out.

Tyler heard odd sounds.

Growling,  
And suddenly..

Yelling.  
Tyler tried to open the door.  
Locked.

On instinct, he reached for the front of the car, taking the risk to fall over.  
The cuffs on his wrists weren't helping.  
He managed to unlock the door, and to crawl out, taking a gun with him from the car.  
He saw the police officer, sprawled on the floor in front of him, and a bloody figure crawling towards him.  
Tyler hesitated to shoot it.

The figure violently bit on the crook of the police officer's neck, leaving a hasty scream.  
Tyler shot the thing instantly, right in the head.

"... what the fuck."

The police officer was bleeding out quickly.  
This never happened before.

Tyler grabbed the keys to get his cuffs off from the officer, and ran.

  
More were chasing after him.


	3. Audrey Anne Holt.

Audrey was considered a rookie in the west part of the isolated city.  
Her full name was Audrey Anne Holt.  
She was 17, and rather tough looking for a girl.  
She held guns at her place, and could flip a man backwards.  
In a way, she was a "perfect little princess" to Josh.  
Smart, snarky, strong,  
Josh was none of that.  
He hated her guts, but he had to admit, she was better than him.  
She had a bigger chance of living.  
And Josh? He was taking lollipops from the local hospital.  
He was skinny, pale, short, and weak.  
He was a more feminine person compared to Audrey.  
Josh sighed, the sting in his cuts were getting annoying.

"... stupid Audrey." He muttered.

Josh was the stupid one.  
He hated Audrey ever since they met.  
She wasn't so nice to him, and Josh got pissed. So what's wrong with that?

They started to fight.  
And of course, as usual, Audrey topped Josh's little hands and small feet.  
He was no superior to her at all.   
He was just some kid.  
Yeah... "some kid".  
Nothing more, nothing less.

Josh missed having his father by his side.

 

  
"Joshua.. you have a cut on your face.."  
"... I know."  
Amelia looked sad.  
"Was it Audrey? I told you to stay away from her. She's harsh on you, isn't she?"  
The woman held a damp cloth to the small boy's face.  
Josh winced.  
".... um... I have.. a question."

"Of course. What do you want to know?"

".. what does.. 'raped'.. mean...?"

".... oh my. Who told you about that?"  
"Audrey said it'd happen to me. Coming from how much better she is at everything compared to me, she's probably right." Josh muttered.

"I.. are you sure you want to know? It's rather.. frightening."

"How scary can it be? I'm an uneducated kid, with a poor family. There can't be any worse right now." Josh grumbled, cheek on his palm.

"Well.. it usually applied to women. It's when two people have sex, you know..? But.. it's forced by one of them."

"... huh?"

"If you ever got raped, it'd mean... someone would force you into a situation you wouldn't like..." Amelia said, cutting herself off.

"... what... kind of situation..?"

"... Audrey just called you vulnerable, sweetie, it's alright." She said.

"I'm not a kid.. just.. tell me." Josh looked to the side.  
"Maybe... you should ask someone else.. I'm sorry, Joshua." Amelia said, and exited the room, with an upset expression.

  
Josh slumped forwards, his head hitting the table.  
".... why am I like this..." he mumbled, voice muffled.

".. she said 'sex'.. ugh, that's kinda gross. How do guys even do it..?"  
"Jeez, what am I thinking?"

Suddenly, an alarm sounded.  
Josh stood up to his feet instantly.  
He grabbed his backpack, mostly filled with candy, a water bottle, and some cans of food.  
There was a pistol at the bottom of the bag, but he never used it. He had no idea how to, anyway.  
He instantly rushed outside to see the commotion.

"... huh...?"

Josh is desperately afraid of the zombies outside.  
It doesn't help him, and it doesn't help anything.  
Ahem he sees one, he instantly becomes immobilized.  
And he was frozen.

 

"Move!!!" A voice snapped him out of his shock.  
He instantly stumbled his way from the crowds, lugging themselves from the wall before, no longer sealed away.  
He ran into an alleyway, hoping nothing was following him.  
He hated being a target.

"You fucker!! Dammit, they saw you...! They're gonna come after me too now...." Audrey cussed, glaring at the small boy.  
"Shut up.... I had to come here...!" Josh glared back, but his fragile voice and mocha eyes seemed sixty times weaker than Audrey's grey, dagger-like stare, and sharp tone.  
"Fuck, why can't you just sacrifice yourself?! It's not like you fucking matter...!"  
"Y-..you're horrible for saying tha-"  
Audrey bashed her gun against the side of Josh's skull.  
He crumpled to the ground, attempting to lift himself up.  
Tears brimmed the edges of his eyes.  
It didn't just hurt, but he felt like he was in a daze.  
"Your goddamn 'feelings' don't matter anymore right now, we just gotta leave...!!"

"... what the hell."

Josh shuddered on the cold pavement, which was shimmering with white and red.

 _"...h...hgh....mph...."_ tears dripped from his eyes.  
".. where the fuck did I hit you...?" Audrey looked nervous suddenly, but even with that expression on her face, she looked angry.  
She turned her head.  
"The goddamn ugly are coming. Dammit, get up." She grabbed Josh's thin arm, dragging him away.

Josh could see dead bodies drag themselves against the rough walls of the buildings, not giving a care about their skin being ripped apart by rocks and concrete as he was being pulled away.

 

  
"Come on...!!"

"Stop fighting me and just come on!!"

"... I.... what's going on...? Are we never going back to there...?" Josh mumbled, his head lowered.

"... that place is gone now. You won't be going back anytime soon. Just forget about it."

"... but.... what about my.. mom...?"

"Dammit, you were practically raised with no fucking parents. Why are you being so childish?! They're gone! Everything's gone, just keep moving. The world isn't the same anymore." Audrey hissed, pulling Josh forwards.  
"... I..."

"Why'd you bother to save me...? We've hated each other for a few years. I'm not worth anything, anyway... I should have just died in that group..." Josh weeped, which he rarely did ever since that day humanity struggled.

"Josh, I'm not that much of a bitch. But you're pretty sensitive in my opinion right now. But you gotta keep moving. I do in fact want humanity to take control again. So if we gotta apologize to each other in order to keep moving, then-.. I'll do it." Audrey said, her face completely straight.  
"Listen, could you stop sniffling for a second? Are we cool now?"

  
"... o-..okay.. ...okay." Josh gulped.

 

 

  
"Great. Now we gotta actually leave."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hHHHhhHh I'm honestly so scared to be putting this out because whenever I write stuff like this it goes bad after a while  
> I hope you guys still stick around tho and I really, really do hope you like it :'))


	4. Promise

"... I'm kinda scared."  
"Of course you're scared. You're always scared. We're not in the city anymore."  
".. what'll happen to Amelia? Will she be able to make it out...?" Josh nervously held his fingers.  
"Josh... we don't know. She could be dead right now." Audrey's eyes glinted in the dark, an orange glare appeared from the fire in front of her.  
".... it's... really dark.. and.. s-..sorta cold."  
Audrey sighed.  
"You're really childish, you know that? It's tiring." She looked away.  
"I-..I can't fix it.. well, not instantly, I suppose.." Josh muttered.

"Are we gonna sleep here?" Josh asked, filled with questions.  
"I dunno. Did we set up goddamn fire and put down our things just to keep moving?" Audrey narrowed her eyes.

".. geez..."

  
The next morning, the two moved on.  
To Audrey, Josh was so aloof.  
Innocent.  
And annoying.  
He's extremely sensitive too.  
He even carried around a tooth brush with him, as if he was getting ready for a road trip.  
Pathetic, she thought.  
Josh was like a kid.  
No, he kinda was a kid.  
Scared of the dark, unable to move when he sees a zombie..  
Audrey thought to herself for a second.

  
That bitch Amelia. Was that his only role model then...?

She's kind, but like Josh, she doesn't like being violent.  
She never teaches Josh about the fucked up things outside.  
She's a nurse, of course. She's generally not on the offensive side.  
And because of that, Josh never learned about the zombies, the muggers, the crazy people..  
Josh never even knew that some people were being treated unfairly by the soldiers, such as an unfair amount of their share of food.  
Josh was being dumb.  
He wanted the world to be kind, so he pretended the world was kind.  
But look at their situation now.

 

"I... can we please stop for a second...?"

"What? Why?" Audrey turned her head, to see Josh panting rapidly, with his hands on his knees.  
"I-I.. I'm just tired.."

"We haven't really walked that far." Audrey said, raising an eyebrow.

  
"I know, but.. I-I.. I'm just.."

  
Josh was extremely pale.

Something shuffled, somewhere towards the city area.

"Wh-..what was that?" Josh stammered, turning around.  
Audrey pulled out her gun, and slowly walked towards the sound.  
Josh heard a new sound.

"Shit! We're being watched. We gotta go." Audrey grabbed Josh's arms agin, and pulled him relentlessly like last time.  
"What is it...?!" Josh's voice was shaking up.  
"I dunno, but they have a rifle.." Audrey was dragging him like a bag.

Suddenly, Josh's foot got trapped in something.  
He tripped and fell over, Audrey's grasp disappearing.  
A red gash on his face appeared. Josh winced.

"Josh-"

"Stay right where you are, or I'll shoot you." A voice emerged from behind.  
Josh couldn't see who it was.  
But Audrey backed away, and held up her arms.

  
"... that's right. You're all cowards. Silly."  
A rough hand pushed Josh's head into the dirt, making his vision useless.  
"What do you want? We're just kids trying to escape those fucking monsters. We don't have much." Audrey was pissed.  
"Aw. How cute. You think lying will get to me?" The man's voice was sugar-coated. It sounded friendly, almost, but Josh could already tell that he was a dick.  
"... you bitch." Audrey muttered.  
Josh grabbed the man's arm on his head, desperately trying to get it off.  
The man just chuckled.  
"Now that I think about it, maybe I won't just take your stuff, but I might as well have this little cutie here."  
Josh gaped, suddenly horrified, he struggled some more. Whimpering in the process.  
The man grabbed his arms in an instant, and he was like twigs on the road.  
He was lifted up, and Josh could get a good look at the guy.  
Dark hair, captivating eyes, tall, lean figure, kinda has a large forehead..  
Josh gulped. He looked miserable.  
"You're so small. I wonder what it'll be like to do things to you. What would you sound like if you screamed..? Or even cried..?" The man cooed in his ear. Josh shivered.  
With his free hand, the man slipped his arm down to Josh's inner thigh.  
The poor boy's breath hitched.  
"Nonononono... no... nono...." he murmured relentlessly, losing it, tears welled up in his eyes.  
Desperately trying to shake the guy's hand off his thigh, a few tears streamed down his face.  
The hand just went higher and higher.  
"Wanna cry? Wail for me."  
"N-...no...!" Josh choked out.  
"Scream. I wanna hear you scream and sob."  
"N....n-no...!!" Josh yelled, eyes glaring with anger and fear.  
"G-get off me....!!!" He struggled, refusing to cry out loud.  
He already hated the fact that he was tearing up.  
"Aw. Cute. You tryin' to be strong?" The man cooed again.  
"F...fuck you." Josh hissed in the man's face.

He was bashed against the ground, his nose feeling like it was on fire, and his eyes damp with soil and tears.  
"How about this?"  
"I take the boy, and you can keep your resources." The man gave Audrey a nasty smile.

".. what..?! But.. I can't just-"  
"Ten seconds."

His wide, creepy, nocturnal predator eyes kept her frozen.  
"I-... but.."

"3... 2..."  
"Wait...!"

"1."

The man grabbed Josh's mouth shut, and held his gun to his head.  
"Leave. He's mine now."  
Josh began to shudder in fear.  
Audrey couldn't move for a few seconds. Then she started to hastily walk towards Josh.  
"Y-you.. you're not taking hi-"

The man aimed his rifle at Audrey.

 

"I SAID LEAVE."

 

The man's voice raised to a point where Audrey flinched.

"... you could leave now with your shit, or I'll be taking both the boy, and your shit."

  
Audrey stood there, scoffing.  
She slowly grabbed her bags, and began to back away.

Josh couldn't quite decipher the look on her grey eyes, but he could see something.  
It was rather small, but he could feel it in his mind.

 

 

  
_"I'll be back for you."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tyler will come in soon :'))))


	5. Hands.

"Don't fucking touch me."

"Cursing now, aren't you? You're quite vulnerable right now. You wouldn't want to make me angry." The man sneered.  
Josh was tied up in a dark building, and it was cold. The only light source there was would be from that one little window above his head, giving a blue undertone.

"What's your name, honey?"

"Fuck you."

"How drunk were your parents for naming you that?"

Josh hated being like this.  
Small, babyish, and unable to fight back.

"Your name's Josh, isn't it? I'm Brendon."

"...." Josh narrowed his eyes, glaring at Brendon.

The small boy had his wrists tied together to each other, as well as his ankles.

"Don't feel like talking, huh? Sooner or later, you'll be a mess anyway." Brendon sneered.

  
Josh looked up.  
"What.. kind of mess..?" He mumbled, keeping quiet.

Brendon had this gross smirk on his face.  
"Imagine yourself, screaming, moaning, and writhing on the cold concrete floor, right here, ass-naked, and legs spread apart like fucking butter on pancakes. Could you, now?" He laughed.

"That's-... what're you gonna.. do to me...?" Josh's voice trembled.  
"I'm pretty sure it's obvious."

"B-but... but I'm o-only sixteen a-and.. I-I'm a guy..."

"Do you think I fucking care? You look like a twink."

Audrey was right.  
Josh was going to get raped. Simple.  
Actually, it was terrifying.  
Josh was going to break out sobbing.  
Audrey was always right.  
And Josh was always wrong.  
Wrong wrong wrong.

  
"W-..why can't you just kill me...? I'll be using your resources a-and.." He stammered, unable to talk normally due to the pit of fear in his stomach.  
"I-I'm annoying, so I'll just-"  
"That'll make it more fun." Brendon got close to Josh's face, holding his chin.  
Josh shuddered at the feeling.

Josh couldn't take it anymore, tears fell from his pretty eyes, and he cried.  
Weeping, he begged and begged for release.

"I don't wanna be here...! Please let me go...! I don't wanna do this...!"

Brendon stared at the small, vulnerable boy, shivering and shaking, sobbing his heart out.

"Y-you can take my b-bag... a-and all of my food.. p-please let me go...!!" Josh sobbed.

  
"Tonight. I'll see you tonight." Brendon winked, and shut the door behind him, leaving Josh sobbing loudly and crying.

 

"S-somebody..!!" He hiccuped.  
"Please d-don't make him hurt me...!!"

 

 

 

 

While Audrey was scuffling through the shelves of an old abandoned fancy restaurant, which wasn't so fancy anymore due to the attacks and virus, she heard something.  
Weak, and echoing.

  
".. forget about it. It's nothing."  
"Just keep looking..." she muttered to herself, desperately searching for ammo.  
She found a few bullets, and a pack, but she believed that she still needed more though, who knew what kind of fucked up killer maniac had in store for Josh, or even her.  
It was quite obvious that Josh was going to get sexually assaulted.  
The piece of shit reached in between his legs, trying to touch Josh's crotch.  
It was fucked up for Josh to go through, and Audrey to watch.  
And Audrey knew that Josh was a sensitive boy, with no meat on his bones and a tiny voice.  
She didn't want to imagine it anymore.

The simple truth was, she actually didn't want to fight that man.  
She didn't want to admit that she was scared.

  
The sound was getting louder, but it definitely wasn't getting closer.  
It sounded, slightly.... heavenly.  
And.. was that a piano..?

Bouncing off the walls, she gave in to the luring song.  
She followed it's tracks, trying to figure out what it was.  
Someone.  
Someone was singing.

It was still quite warbled to her, but she could tell it was someone singing.  
She looked down below into the first floor of the building.  
She saw a man in his early twenties, sitting on the seat of a piano, slightly rocking himself, and singing in the light of the broken glass.

 

_"I'm a goner... somebody catch my breath."_

  
_"I'm a goner... somebody catch my breath."_

  
He lifted his head, his heavy eyelashes making him drowsy looking.

  
_"I wanna be known.. by.. you."_

_"I wanna be known.... by... you.."_

  
Audrey slowly snuck her way down, getting a better look at the male, his brown scruffy hair, his droopy eyes, his lanky figure, his worn down fingers, and a prisoner uniform shirt.

He seemed to have had a gun, but it was a small pistol, and it was on a table, away from his reach.

  
_"Though I'm weak... and beaten down,"_

_"I'll slip away, into the sound.."_

_"The ghost of you, is close to me.."_

_"I'm inside out.."_

_"You're.. underneath..."_

He played a few notes, and took a breath before preparing to sing another verse.

"...ahem."  
Audrey cleared her throat suddenly.  
She didn't know why she did it, she just felt like it.  
And she wanted to curse at herself for doing so.  
The man stopped, and he didn't turn around.  
"I-..uh.."

"Yes...?" The man's voice was surprisingly sweet sounding, yet not very happy.  
"I.. you know.. I was just.. I know it's weird for me to ask you for something like this, and.. I don't even know you.. but.. m-my ...friend-" Audrey hesitated on the word 'friend'.  
"He got taken away by some fucked up guy, and I'm pretty sure he's gonna get raped.."

".. before I actually do something.. could I ask about the man who took him?" The prisoner questioned, slightly sighing.

"Yeah.. yeah, of course. I don't actually know his name, but he had dark hair, creepy eyes, and he had a huge forehead, and-"

"... I didn't know Brendon had a thing for little boys." The male chuckled.  
"Brendon...? Oh god you know him?! Thank fucking god..! C-could you ever help me save.."

The man looked down at the ground, biting his bottom lip as if he was thinking.  
"I know that jackass. We both come from jail. He used to bug the shit out of me."

"But.. I-I dunno.. I'm not sure if I'd be up for it. Saving your friend, I mean." He murmured.  
The hopeful look on Audrey's face dissipated.

"B-but.. I promised myself that I'd save him.. he's a bitch sometimes, but I can't just let someone die...!" Audrey's eyes darted around the building.  
"Who knows what'll happen to him by nighttime. He might be ripped apart by not just Brendon, but...-" Audrey spat out, feeling despaired.  
"Y-..you've gotta help me.. it's already dusk."

"..."

  
"...please!"

 

  
"There's a chance for you and me to learn."

The man opened his eyes.

"We both done bad. But we can save somebody."

 

"... you don't know what I've done." The man murmured.

"But it's bad enough do you to end up in prison!"

He wouldn't look at her face.

"Please."

"....."

 

 

 

"Alright.... alright."

 

  
"I'm Tyler. And.. you are?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that was better when I wrote it but now that I read it's really boring rip I'm sorry for that but hey tyler


	6. Who are all of these people?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning: sexual assault :///

_".... Jenna.."_

_"... I... Tyler..? How in the worl-"_

_"I... I escaped."_

_"Tyler, stop. Where are you heading towards right now?"_

_".... not to your place. I swear."_

_Jenna was quiet on the the telephone._

  
_"You never loved me.. did you...?" Tyler mumbled, a weak smile on his chapped lips._

_Jenna didn't respond._

_"Yeah.. that's what I thought."_

_"Tyler.. I thought I could trust you, but after what you did to your father.. it scares m-"_

_"I know. Jenna.. I know. You never liked me from the beginning. I was just some miserable guy with no one to smile with, no one to protect, no one to love.. no one who loved him, especially."_

_"Jenna... I appreciate the pity." Tyler's voice was frail and hushed, with a genuine sense of sadness._   
_He wasn't very strong at this moment, for he had a sad smile, dreary eyes, and weak knees._

_Dirty fists, and worn down shoes,_

_Puffy hair, puffy eyes, red nose._

_Tyler was clearly having trouble, holding things together in his life._

_"So. I guess you know now." Jenna sighed._

_"....yeah." Tyler's voice cracked._

_"So it's over now, right?"_

_"...... yeah... I guess... it's over now.. haha..."_

 

 

"So... what's your plan?" Tyler's long legs stuck outwards from the seat of the piano, in a relaxed position.  
"Well," Audrey look at the bits of ammo she had left.  
"We'll attack him, right? He's kind of a fast guy. It's gonna be hard." The brunette pointed out.  
"Ugh, I don't even know where he took Josh.. but he forced me to leave the area.." Audrey leaned on her palm, sitting on the dusty ground.  
"Maybe we should get going.. if we stay here, Brendon will kill him, and I'll probably change my mind soon.."  
"Right, right. Of course." Audrey got up instantly, holding the bullets tightly.

 

 

  
Josh peeled his eyelids open.  
He could hear multiple people outside.  
The door opened, and he could see a bounce light from a fire, to the wall.  
He could see a figure similar to someone he already began to hate.

"Hey, slut. You know what time it is..?" He sneered.

Josh cried, screamed, and thrashed his body around, desperately trying to get the ties off.  
His arms and feet were numb from his blood pressure being cut off.

Brendon grabbed a ball gag from one of the dark shelves.  
Josh choked on his own drool as he felt it, stiff and tiring to hold in his mouth, grinding against his teeth.  
Tears spilled from his dreading eyes.  
"Hhhhgh... nngghhhn..." Josh wailed.

Brendon flipped the shirt above Josh's head, leaving it resting on his tied up arms. Josh sobbed, his bony chest visible for all to see.  
"Plhhgse....! Nhg...!!"  
Brendon slowly began to take off the poor boy's pants, leaving him with only his boxers.  
Josh tried to bring his knees to his chest, but Brendon had a strong grip on his thighs.  
Once again, Brendon slipped his hand in between Josh's thighs, slowly getting closer to the boy's crotch.  
Josh flung his legs together, attempting to kick the man away, hitting him right in the face.  
He wasn't strong with the kick, however.  
It suddenly felt as if the pants around his ankles got heavier.  
"Goddamn, you never give up, do you?"  
Brendon slipped off Josh's boxers.  
Josh scream was muffled through the ball gag.  
The man tossed the boy to a shelf, untied his weak legs, pulled off his pants and boxers, and spread open his legs, trying them to the rusty bars.  
Josh's face was bright red from crying his eyes out, and the embarrassment of being naked.  
His eyes were thin, and his face was all scrunched up. He suddenly couldn't breath.

Brendon got close to his ear, bending over Josh's revealing body.

"Have you ever heard of the term, 'gang raped'?" He whispered, with a malicious grin on his face.

 

 

Josh couldn't hear anything, or see anything.  
The plugs in his ears and the damp, teary blindfold on his eyes made him want to throw up.  
And of course, the erotic pose he was tied up in made him feel like anything was going to happen.

  
He felt a rough hand touch him.  
He whimpered, more tears wetting the blindfold.  
It wasn't Brendon's, this one felt more old.. and.. harsh.  
His legs pulled against the ropes.  
A few more hands grabbed at his chest, and his thighs.  
Josh was suffering.  
He whimpered and cried, until he felt something enter his body, that's when he screamed as loud as he could.  
Hyperventilating, he bashed the back of his head against the cold shelf.  
"Au..ghr...ey...!!! Plghese...!!" He choked through the ball gag.  
The blindfold suddenly flew off, and his earplugs were removed.

"Open your mouth."

"Ngh..no...!!" His mouth was still wet with drool.  
The older man grabbed at his jaw, and pried it apart.  
 _"No...!!"_ He screamed, shaking violently.  
The finger inside of him went further in.  
Josh arched his back, letting out a loud cry.  
He soon realized what'll happen within those 0.2 seconds.  
His mouth was open, and he was weak.  
He really didn't want to do this.

  
But the man didn't move.

There was a loud sound behind him.  
Blood splattered all over Josh's body, and the man fell over, face in Josh's chest.  
Josh's eyes went wide, shuddering like crazy, his breathing shaky and unkept.

"Back away." He heard an unfamiliar voice.

  
"Back away from the goddamn boy."

  
No one moved.

Audrey threw her fist directly on one of their faces.  
"Fuckers..!!" She yelled.  
The unfamiliar savior shot the others dead with no hesitation.

Audrey cut off the ropes holding Josh in that position. His limbs flew down, and he instantly covered himself up with his clothes, shaking violently, looking at all the blood on his body.  
Tears streamed down his face.  
The man swept him up in his arms, holding him close.  
"He's.. he's fucked in the head." Audrey stared down at Josh's traumatized expression.  
"We gotta wash all this shit off, first. I wouldn't like bathing in brains and blood, myself." Tyler said, rushing out of the building.  
Audrey followed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't bring myself to let Josh have his actual virginity be taken away by somebody who isn't tyler oops
> 
>  
> 
> I'm sorry : )))))))))))


	7. Comforting Hand

**_"...y-...you saw me naked.."_**  
"No, Josh. I promise you. It was too dark. All I saw was his fingers inside...."  
Audrey watched the poor boy shake and shudder, suddenly clinging onto the stranger she met just a few hours ago like he needed him.  
"...I couldn't h-...h-hear anything... I couldn't see what t-they were doing.." Josh shivered, his eyes glued to Tyler's chest while he was splashing Josh's back with water to get off the blood.  
It was cold, yet he hated having all of those meaty bits stuck to his skin.  
"W-...was Brendon... there...?" Josh finally looked back at Audrey, still holding that traumatized look in his eyes.  
"No.. surprisingly. But that means.. he's still aliv-"

"o-oh god no..." Josh buried his face into his hands, tears dripping into the lake.

Audrey felt guilty.  
And not just because of before, and how she treated Josh.  
She knew she was going to leave.  
And she'd be leaving him with no one.

  
"Hey um... Josh? I need to tell you something."  
Josh just sniffled.  
"I.. have a friend a few states away."

"And I've been thinking about it, and.."

"I can't take care of you. You can't take care of yourself either. I don't know who to leave you with."

There was a 'tsk' from Tyler.

"L-look! I'm sorry, but Josh is kinda childish, he can't protect himself or anyone for shit, and he has no idea where food comes from anymore..!" Audrey held her arms out as if she wanted reassurance.  
"And I know I just met you, but... you're way older than me, Tyler. You could help him out, right...?"

"I'm not a caretaker." He said, his voice cool and alluring as usual.  
"But I'm not either! I can't take Josh with me if he can't shoot, help me find food, or even manage to make it out alive. We took a few steps away from the place we've known, and he's already a target."

"I'm not saying I was planning this when I first met you, but I was really hoping you could help us out here. If he comes with me, he'll drag me down, and we'll both end up dead."

  
Josh looked down.

"You can just tell he's weak. Can't you?" Audrey exclaimed.  
Tyler gave a long look at Josh's ridden face.  
"I guess so. Why would you trust me with him, though? Aren't you scared of what I've done?"

"I don't know what you've done. And frankly, I don't give a shit."

"Josh might." Tyler gave him a side look.  
"... well what have you done?" Josh mumbled, his voice quiet.  
"I'm better off not telling you... actually. You'll probably freak out."  
The small boy kept his mouth shut.

"Then are you gonna go with it?" Audrey asked.  
".... what about you? Won't you be in danger yourself? You'll be alone."  
"I'll be fine. Kill some fuckers here and there, I can do that."  
"It's really not that easy... but okay...? How old are you again?"  
"I'm nineteen. Josh is sixteen, but he hasn't really aged."  
"I can tell."

"You'll be leaving at morning, right? Leaving me here with a kid.. won't be very fun." Tyler but his bottom lip again. He seemed as if he was stressed.

"You'll figure something out."

 

The three walked their way to somewhere safe, with the exception of Tyler carrying Josh.  
They found an old abandoned RV, a few pictures of families here and there.

When dawn came,  
Audrey grabbed her things.  
"So this is it, right? You nervous being on your own?" Tyler asked, his legs crossed while sitting on a chair.  
"... yeah. I guess I kinda am. I'm not usually alone. It'll be creepy."  
"I hope you make it safe."  
"Yeah... you too."

 

"There's something I wanna leave you with before I go, though."

 

 

Tyler brought Josh to a bed in the RV, setting down a few blankets and letting the shaky boy fall asleep.  
And, unlike Audrey, he didn't force him to wake up when it was morning.

  
Josh woke up on his own, seeing Tyler sitting on a chair nearby.  
"... hello."

"H-..hi."

".. where's Audrey? D-did she leave already...?" Josh looked upset.  
Tyler sighed.  
"Yeah.. she did."  
Josh looked down.  
"... she kept calling me weak. I am weak. She's leaving me cause I'm weak." Josh muttered, looking sad.  
"Well.. maybe in a sense, she's right. But it's fine. It'll turn out okay." Tyler said, turning his head a bit. Josh scoffed. "Maybe.."

"So, what's the plan? Where are we heading?"

"... we need food,-"  
"I know that."  
"A-and.. we might have to stay somewhere else." Josh stammered.

"But.. I-..I barely know you. I'm sorry. Could you.."  
"Oh, right. Yeah. I'm Tyler. Tyler Joseph." The man said, his voice rather cold but not sharp. It was slightly comforting, like a hand on cool steel.  
"I'm.. Josh Dun.. nice to meet you."

  
"So, when do you plan on hitting the road?" Tyler asked, grabbing a canister of canned fruits.

"I... um.."   
Tyler passed the can to him.  
"U-.. is this for me..?"

"Yeah. Go ahead, take it. I'm fine, don't worry." Tyler said.  
"W-we don't have that much food... why don't we share?"  
"No, it's fine. I'm not that hungry." Josh got a good look at Tyler's eyelashes.  
"U-um... th-thanks..." the boy couldn't help but smile a tad bit.

  
"I hope you're feeling better from yesterday. That was pretty messed up." Tyler said.  
"Yeah... i-i..it was... felt really weird.. and.. painful.. I'm glad I got saved before they did anything else though. They're dead.. so I guess I'm okay... but Brendon's not. He's still on the loose, isn't he...?" Josh looked up to Tyler's tall figure, unsure whether to trust him or not.  
"Yeah, he is.. but I don't think he'll be after you anymore.. well, I hope so at least."  
Josh groaned. "Men are weird."  
Tyler chuckled.  
"I suppose so, though.. you sound like my ex girlfriend."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beebo is still alive and he'll come back at some point lmao


	8. Truck.

Tyler stared at the papers in his hands, twirling a small knife.

Josh poked his head over the older man's shoulder, trying to get a look at the sheets himself, without getting cut.  
"What is that?"  
Tyler shoved them into his tight pockets.  
"Nothing important."  
He stood up, suddenly towering over Josh with such ease.  
"I-..it seemed kinda important to me..." the boy grumbled.  
"It's alright. Promise." Tyler tried to give him a weak reassuring smile.  
".. okay."

  
Tyler was searching through a map found on the floor of the RV, probably left alone by the previous owners.  
"... where do you intend on going..?" Josh asked, hanging close to him.  
"....Damn.. if only we had a working car-"

Something bashed against the window. Josh shrieked, but was silenced quickly due to the gentle hand on his mouth.  
"W-...what is it...? I can't stand any of those things... I-I can't look at it... please kill it..." Josh stammered, clinging onto Tyler's arm, his face pale.  
Tyler loaded his gun, slowly making his way to the door.  
He opened it.  
Josh shut his eyes tightly.

There was no sound for a few seconds.  
Josh peeked through his eyelashes.  
Suddenly, Tyler was grabbed by the neck and pulled out instantly.  
The small boy cried out the name of the brunette, screaming.

"N-no....!"  
A man with a bandana around his mouth grabbed his hair, pulling him out.  
Josh cried.  
"No no no....!! No more...! I can't do this anymore...!" He sobbed.  
The man dropped him on the floor, and he landed on his back.  
"T-Tyler...!!" He wailed like a baby calling for his mother.  
"Fuck you guys...! Burn in he-" A gun was bashed against his face, just like when Audrey got pissed at him, but this one was less directed at his skull.

His head dropped to his chest, pain surging on his cheek and bones.  
Before he knew it, Tyler was bashing his gun on the man's head, crushing his skull in.

Josh was supposed to feel safe.

  
But Tyler was lifting his weapon over his own head, and tossing it down with his suddenly abnormal-looking strength, killing the guy instantly.

  
Josh shivered as he watched Tyler rage silently.  
Almost as if he's done this before.  
It's not just how Tyler acted so calm and cool while doing so..

But Josh could see himself in it.

Bashing against an aircraft,

Something made his stomach lurch.

  
When Tyler was finally done, silently raging, he gasped, and stood there, holding the gun lazily, slightly spattered with fresh blood.

The two other men behind him grabbed at his arms, pushing his head to the cold RV, leaving him immobile.  
They didn't bother to touch Josh, already scared of the man they were restraining.  
Josh kind of was too.

_"Run."_

Tyler mouthed.

But Josh didn't want to be alone.  
Of course, he looked back on the line of blood on Tyler's face, slapping itself on his skin, making him look violent, and he instantly did want to run.  
But Tyler protected him.  
Tyler.. was the only person he had left.  
Why would he give it up like this..?

Before he could actually choose, Josh was bashed against the head again, which was a pain, but he blacked out instantly.

 

  
_When he woke up, he was in a car._  
_It was a sunny afternoon, and in the drivers seat sat his father._  
_The car wasn't broken or damaged in any way possible._  
_Josh felt younger._

 _".. Josh, so.. how's your day going?" He heard his father's light voice, fun and charming._  
_"....... I.. huh...?" Josh stumbled over his own words._  
_"You probably fell asleep, huh? That's alright. We're visiting your mother in the hospital. I'm not quite sure how long it'll be before she wakes up. And.. I'm not sure how I'll be able to pay for the hospital bill too. It's kinda tough right now, huh?"_  
_"..y....yeah.." Josh smiled, relieved from so much suddenly._  
_"You seem to be in a better mood today. Just a few hours ago, you were upset and angry."_  
_Josh looked down._  
_"I'm glad, though."_

 _When the two got out of the car, Josh's father suddenly turned around, and patted his head._  
_Josh beamed._  
_But that moment ended real soon._

 _He was on the cold metal of the back of a moving pickup truck._  
_And world rumbled beneath him._

"I guess we now have a car." Tyler said, his voice calm as usual.  
Josh gave him a glare.  
"I told you to run." Tyler defended himself.  
Josh rolled his eyes.  
"...what even happened...?" He narrowed them, trying to get a good look at what was going on.  
He turned around to look at a window, but instead got a great view of a lob of flesh sitting right beside him, infested with maggots.  
He jumped and shrieked, practically crawling onto Tyler in fear.  
Wrapping his arms around Tyler's neck, he clung onto him, shaking.  
"... I tied off the ropes on your wrists and ankles, by the way." Tyler said, making sure Josh's eyes were on his face.  
"I-..really...?" He wanted to turn around to look again, but was too frightened to do so.  
His head twitched.

A migraine kicked in.

"....ugh..... why does it still hurt.....?"

"Just keep looking at me. Forget about the gross shit over there. Just focus on me."

".. won't we get off?"

"They're going at quite a fast rate here. If we ever tried, we'd get hurt. And plus, they have our stuff."

Josh groaned again, this time it was muffled in Tyler's shirt.

"It'll be alright. I'm sure of it. I'll figure something out." Tyler said, his voice normal as ever.  
"How can you always be so calm...?" Josh almost sounded hurt.

".... I don't want you to panic." Tyler smiled gently, a reddish stain on his cheek showed through his slight dimples.

Josh realized he was in Tyler's lap.  
Yet he didn't want to let go.

".... where will they take us...?"

"I don't know, but it'll turn out alright. I promise."

  
".... okay... I... I'll.. trust you, Ty."

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter concept:  
> CANNIBALISMMM
> 
>  
> 
> that shouldn't sound very optimistic but eh I'm just having fun


	9. Kin

The truck stopped, and Josh's small body was shivering and shaking from the cold and his dead fear.  
Tyler could feel it all. Josh's shaky breathing, the chills in his back, it was at the point where Tyler had to pull him closer in order to make him feel safer.  
Awkward, it was. Josh even began to whimper.  
The sky was dark by the time they managed to make it to the end of the car drive.  
Josh was all curled up on Tyler by then, still cowering and cold.

The truck stopped in the dark.

  
Suddenly, somebody grabbed Josh's thigh.  
Josh yelped, unsure of where it came from, and where he was.  
Tyler quickly tugged him away, Josh held his knees to his chest, shaking in Tyler's grasp.

"Josh! It's you! It feels like I haven't seen you in so so long...!" A woman exclaimed, her voice making her sound like a lunatic.  
Josh stopped shaking.  
"...huh?"

"My, I never realized! You look so different all of a sudden..."

  
"... are you... Amelia..?"  
The woman was wearing a long sleeved shirt and jeans, like some soccer mom.

"You don't remember...? That's no good, Josh..."

"I-..I..." Josh was at a lost for words.

"Who's he? Why's he holding you like that?" Amelia snapped, pecking at Josh with her odd tones and words.

Tyler held the small boy closer to his chest.  
"We're traveling together. Who're you?" Tyler said, his voice calm as usual.  
"I used to be Josh's friend...!" Amelia said, while Josh was looking nervous.  
"I nursed his mother for years! He knows me sooo well..!" A grin appeared in her face.

Josh began to cling onto Tyler's neck again.

"Here, here...! Come out for a second...!" Amelia seethed.

She suddenly stopped.

 

 _"... who cut off the ropes...?"_ Her voice lowered.

"...u-uhm...-"   
"I did." Tyler said.  
Amelia gave him a dormant look, though it looked creepy and uncomfortable.

  
"Is that so...? You two must be hungry. Why don't you follow me..?" Amelia dragged Josh by his hand, pulling him away from Tyler.

"J-..Josh I-"

  
But the two disappeared in the dark.  
Amelia somehow vanished, bring Josh along with her.

"..Josh...? Josh!" Tyler called out the yellow haired boy's name.

"Josh?!"

"Where the fuck...?!" Tyler turned his head quickly.

The two men from before stepped up, putting a gun to his head.

 

 

 

All Josh remembered was the burning smell, and the blinding light on his right eye.  
He winced, and his eyelashes fluttered open.  
Once again, we was used to this situation.  
Though, the ties this time were painful, and he was laying on his side in an uncomfortable position, his hands behind his back, and his knees to his chest, legs tied together as well.  
Not just tied, they were bonded together, with scratchy duck tape on the cracks.  
He was in a dark storage room, it seemed.

"Joshua.. you're awake! I can't wait to have dinner. I'm sure it'll be great." Amelia smiled.

"....."  
The boy didn't realize his mouth was duck taped, but he couldn't even make sound, or move.

What happened..?  
His memory was quite fuzzy.

"Oh, honey, that's the drug. You remember?" Amelia pulled out a syringe.  
"You fell to the floor like a wooden board." She giggled. "Yet you looked so... beautiful. It's weird, you know? But I'm glad, cause it'll make this all the better."  
Josh's eyelids were slightly low, as if he was sleepy and groggy, and unable to move.  
He rarely blinked.  
He was in a daze.

  
That's right...

When Amelia dragged him away from Tyler, he remembered suddenly feeling a sharp pain in his neck, before dropping to the ground.  
What was Amelia doing...? This wasn't like her.  
But she's not infected for sure.  
What's going on...?  
And what was she going to do with him..?  
She walked closer, slowly.

"You know, the best part about this..." she trailed her hands against his small body, and sides, going down to his thighs.  
"Your body looks so pretty. So.. tasty. And your legs are gorgeous. Those thighs of yours are a bit chubbier than the other parts of your body, right? You're too skinny.. but I bet you'll be better than that girl last week. She was a struggler for sure. I don't think I have many problems with you. You're so weak and submissive.." Amelia sneered.  
Josh shivered, a tingle making its way up his back.  
"I'm glad I got you away from that freak. Taylor, that's his name right? Oh well. I'll see you in a bit, I gotta get the saw."  
The bright light behind her disappeared with her figure as she closed the door.

 _'His name's Tyler..'_ Josh thought, going insane himself.

  
The crazed woman opened the door again, not saying a word this time.  
She grabbed Josh's wrists, and dragged him out into the hallway, then outside, and then into a shed.  
He could see the lighted windows from the place he was just in.

Amelia shut the door behind her, and turned on a few lights, dim and flickering.  
Josh was pulled onto a chair, his body weak and sore.  
Before him sat a man with a bag on his head, and his arms behind his back just like Josh.

Amelia grabbed the handsaw, and walked towards the man.

 _".....mmph..."_ Josh's muffled sounds were almost as if he was whispering.  
"You know, I found this one, wandering around like a doofus, y'know? He even begged me for help. I shot him, and brought him back here so I could cut him up. Turns out, flesh spoils rather quickly." Amelia whipped the bag of his head, and a rotten face came into view, eyes white and skin grey. It was all wrinkled and slightly red. Josh shrieked through the duck tape, crying out.  
"You know, maybe I should have given him another chance. Then, I could have had him, and you'd be able to recognize him."  
Josh was shaking. His heartbeat started to kick up. He couldn't bare looking at any of those things. He was losing it. He needed Tyler, and he needed him _bad_.

 

"And the weird thing is, when I was looking at his little uniform name tag, it said 'Bill Dun.'"

 

 

"Isn't that kinda funny?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drag that bitch, Josh.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ((btw the only person who'll ever eat Josh would be tyler ngl))


	10. Pretty

Something inside Josh churned.

  
His face went livid, and he was pale.  
Extremely pale.  
And it wasn't just Josh's anemia.  
His father, unrecognizable, was now right in front of him. Rotten, and worn down.  
He was infected.  
He was dead.

  
Amelia shot him.

Amelia killed his father, who he hadn't even had the chance to apologize to him.  
Tears rushed down the small boy's face, shaking and becoming so weak and tiny.  
He felt degraded. Easily used.  
Easily pushed around.  
This was worse when he got assaulted.  
"...p..papa...." he cried, his voice hollow and muffled. He was sick of hearing himself cry.  
"Awww...! That's so cute..! _'Papa'_... he doesn't quite look like your papa now, does he...?" Amelia snorted.  
Josh was so weak. So boring, so dumb, too innocent, and useless.  
Everything he stood for now meant nothing.  
Josh was a failure.  
Dropping out of school, hating his parents for no reason, letting his father die..

Josh hated it all.

He struggled against the bonds, the drug wearing off.  
He even began to chew at the tape on his delicate lips.

But knowing himself, he was the weakest person he's ever heard of.  
Josh couldn't do anything.  
His brittle fingers unable to do any damage at the binds, and his limp legs unable to push apart, he cried even more as Amelia pulled out the handsaw.  
Amelia lugged it with her as she turned around.  
Josh gave her a disgusted glare while he sobbed silently.  
"Hmm. Angry, huh? I shot him. You're right. I shot him. But you... you killed him. And he was bound to die, and why's that?" Amelia said, her face and words no long sweet.  
"....." Josh's eyes tensed up.  
"You killed him. Not me. He was going to die, whether I shot him or left him." She touched his cheek gently, Josh waned to bite her hand off. He shook it away.  
"Tch."  
Amelia swung the handle side of the saw at his stomach.  
He cried out in held back pain, his eyes twitching.

_'shut up, shut up, shut up...'_

"Damn, you're quite petty. I dunno where to go for first.. the best is for last.. right..?" Amelia eyed his skinny body.

Suddenly, the window shattered, flying directly into her direction.

  
Josh winced.

Amelia's breathing was shaky. Shards of glass were everywhere, picking into her body. Blood was slightly rushing down her skin.

"... you no-faced fucker..!!!" She screamed, her voice cracking as she lifted the saw above her head, and began to thrust it down towards Josh's head.  
Josh's eyes widened.  
Suddenly, there was a gunshot. She doubled over, screaming in agony and anger.  
"Get your ass over here if you want to kill me, jackass...!!" She screamed like a lunatic, right out the window, attracting sound.  
Suddenly, Tyler bashed the shed door open, and Amelia held her saw tightly.

"... you wanna shoot me? Do it. I dare you. Do it!!" The woman shook violently, grinning like a bitch.  
"... come on, Josh." He began to cut off the binds on Josh's wrists.  
Amelia lowered her weapon.

"...huh..? What're you doing? Just shoot me!! Take him away, I'll eat you both!!!" She shook the sharp object at them.

Tyler cut the binds off Josh's ankles as well.  
Tyler head out his arms, seeing the poor boy was crying his eyes out, thinking he'd want a hug.  
But instead, the moment he was free, the boy grabbed the woman by the shoulders, throwing her into the corner.  
Amelia dropped the saw from shock, and quickly attempted to crawl back up.  
Josh grabbed a loose piece of wood falling apart from the shed, bashing it in her face, crushing her skull in.  
"J-..Josh...!!" Tyler turned around instantly.

Screaming as he did so, he went down in her badly.  
Amelia stopped breathing.  
"Josh.. what the he-"

The boy kept bashing her bloody, mushy face with that very piece, which was already drenched in red.  
His face had bits of red in there too, like Tyler did.  
When he finally stopped, he took a look at the gross dead body.  
He instantly dropped the sharp wooden piece.  
He began to shake.

"....I-...I...."

  
"I killed.... I k-killed.... h-her..." he turned his head frantically, tears rushing down his face again as he saw the look on Tyler's face, his voice slurring just a tiny bit.

".... Josh... why'd you do that....?" He gasped out.

".... I-...I..."

_"... I...."_

  
"S-...she... she shot him...!! She shot... she shot my... m-my... sh-..p...papa...." his words were nothing but shaky blabbers and cries, and his hands convulsed along with his body.  
He attempted to point at the long rotten zombie by the other side of the shed, but Tyler already got the hint.  
He crouched down, and pulled Josh into his lap as the poor boy hyperventilated.

Tyler didn't say anything.

 

He felt bad for Josh. He was so young and pure.  
Although, Tyler had to admit..

He felt a little jealous of how much Josh loved his father.

  
"I-I'm... a-all gross....." Josh refrained from letting Tyler touch his bloody face and arms, cringing at himself.  
"It's alright, angel... it's alright, I don't mind. Everything'll be okay, I promise." He said again, clutching Josh gently.

 _'I promise.'_  
Did he ever really promise..?

He looked for a towel somewhere in the touch, and wiped Josh's face and arms, getting off most of the blood.  
Josh felt so disgusted with himself.  
Then he looked at Tyler.

".... you're bleeding.." he whispered, noticing the stream of blood near his near and above his hairline.  
"Yeah.. I know. But I'm fine."

"Are you really....? And.. how'd you make it to me..?" Josh asked, his voice small and a slight octave higher from all of the crying.

"They tried to shoot me in the brain.. missed.. and I.. I guess I ran them over. And I'm okay, I swear."  
Josh's eyes widened, then he looked away, realizing he had no right to be surprised, after all, he just stabbed a lady in the face around thirty seven times..  
"Though, we have a ride now. And a fair amount of gas too. So that's good." Tyler's face flashed with a relieving smile.

 

Josh suddenly realized how kind Tyler actually was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll let you in on a little secret, I constantly watch the comment count and I wait for new comments so it'd be great if you could comment because I get real excited when I see a new comment :)))))))
> 
>  
> 
> pretty please


	11. Leap

Josh didn't why he held onto Tyler's hand while he was on the wheel.  
When Tyler got in, Josh just suddenly grabbed it, as if he needed it.  
Tyler's hands were a bit calloused, yet fairly gentle on the boy, making him feel safe.  
He sat in the passenger seat for the first time, his legs slightly swing as if he was a child.  
Soon, Josh fell asleep, head on his shoulder, hands gently grasping Tyler's on his lap.  
He hadn't spoken at all ever since they got in the car, which made it awkward for Tyler to comprehend.  
He tried not to complain about it, of course.  
Josh needed all the comfort he could get.  
He did looked peaceful, and frankly, cute.

The sun was rising, and Josh's eyes gently opened, lashes slightly glistening in the orange dawn.  
He held onto Tyler's hand, signaling he was awake.

"... hey." Tyler said, his raspy voice greeting him.  
"Hey.. I... how long has it been..? Since I fell asleep..?" Josh asked, his voice small as usual.  
"It's only been a few hours. It was pretty damn late when I got to you."

"... that's right... hey, why didn't you just leave..?" Josh asked.  
".... pardon?"  
"I'm weak, and I can't do anything but cry. You'd be better off without me. I'd just bring everyone down, like Audrey said.." Josh mumbled, looking down at Tyler's hand sadly.

 

 

"... oh. Of course I.. well..."

 

  
"The truth is... I guess I'm scared of being alone." Tyler said, his voice genuine.

 

 

 

".. you're scared.. of being alone?"

"Yeah. I get sad." He admitted.

Josh didn't expect someone as tough and emotionless as Tyler to be afraid Of having no one.  
It made no sense.  
".. that's... that's unexpected." Josh mumbled.  
"I guess it kinda is, huh?" Tyler let out a small sigh with a weak smile, only visible in the sun as he drove the car.  
They were on a bridge at the moment, and they were the only moving car on it.  
The rest were all broken down, rusty, and abandoned.

  
"Hey, Josh, why don't you tell me about yourself..? Cause I obviously don't plan on leaving you anytime soon.." Tyler asked, his voice rather sweet sounding to Josh's ears. He felt so safe.  
"... well.. I... as a kid.. I never did well in school.. and my mom got sick. My dad was always infatuated with his planes and stuff.. he rarely payed attention to us."  
"Damn, that sucks. You ever got a girlfriend?"  
".. no.. of course not. But I turned into some rebel bitch.. dyed my hair.. got piercings.. tattoos.. I'm still not very intimidating as you can see, but I was hoping I'd be so."

Tyler made a 'tsk' sound at the slur escaping the boy's lips.

"S-sorry..."

Josh's lips curled into a sweet smile, talking about normal things to Tyler.  
Not about the zombies,  
Not about the messed up people in the world.  
Just normal things that normal people would talk about in normal situations.  
"I never liked any girls.. they always thought I was some dumb kid who had no idea what everyone else was talking about. And the boys in my class hated my guts."

"... you know... the day when the virus started.. I was at the hospital with my mom, and I was in the phone with my dad. He was on a plane."  
"It's normal.. but.. it's not. I smashed up his engine and aircraft, only managing to fix it for him to get in the air."

"... a-and... I never properly apologized.. of course.. he's.. he's... d-dead n-now..." the small boy's lips quivered.  
Tyler's hand trailed to his his cheek, gently wiping his tears away.  
Josh let out a small laugh as he felt Tyler's hand brushing on his face, and the boy was smiling sadly as he wept.  
"It's alright. You were mad at him. I could tell.. I... I did something similar." Tyler said, his voice fading off as he reached the end of his sentence.

"... what'd you do...?" Josh turned his head, wiping his tears away.

"It's more direct, but... it's kinda scary. I dunno if you'd want to hear."

"..." he turned back around, and looked down again.  
"You're a good person, Josh. I don't wanna leave you." Tyler stated.  
"... what makes me a good person...?" Josh's eyelashes dreadily blinked with tears.

"You're strong, don't you think? You'd gone through all of that, and you've seen so much. Yet you're still here with me, having a normal conversation with me.." Tyler chuckled.  
"I feel as if you can change the world.. somehow. I dunno what I'm saying anymore."

When Tyler actually took a look at Josh's face, he realized the boy the blushing furiously, eyes widened in an odd way, as if what Tyler just said was really weird.  
But it wasn't.  
No.... no, it was.

Josh's face was all red.

  
".. how the hell could I... h-how could I change the world..? I'm just some stupid kid.." Josh grumbled, stumbling over his words, still embarrassed.  
Tyler sneered.  
"Well... I'm sure you'll be a great person, at least. I don't know much about you yet.. but.. you could tell me." He said.

"... like... l-like what..?" Josh snapped, tying to sound less embarrassed and more angry.

His heart was jumping.

"Well... what about Audrey? What was it like for you two? Or.. maybe where you guys used to be, at least. How'd you meet her?"

Josh looked away.  
"She used to be a real bitch." He muttered.  
"... language." Tyler gave him a sideways look.  
Josh couldn't help but smile.

"... we'd get into fights often whenever she saw me walking by. It first started when I caught her stealing food from people. I told her off, and she beat me up. So... it was pretty simple."  
"Damn, you guys were that tight, huh? I had a feeling. She wants really fond towards you. She hesitated to call you her friend, even."

"She called me her friend?"

"Well, that explains it. You guys obviously aren't close. No wonder she decided to leave."

Josh had a sad expression on his face.  
"It's alright, though. Things will work out better for the both of us."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

"Ty....?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you teach me how to shoot a gun...? After this.. I mean.."  
"..."

"S-sorry.. that's weird of me to ask.."

  
"No, no, it's alright. I'll help you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanna thank you all for taking the time to read this and comment and leave kudos and such. This really makes me happy, because the truth is, I've written seven joshler fics, including this one, and I've only published three of them.  
> Two of the ones I've published hadn't even gotten to 5-10 readers, and it felt as if only a few people were reading it. The same people always commented, and I often had to beg my friend to read them because no one else did.  
> All of the joshler fics ive done had different plots, and I always had this mindset that I was good at making up plots, but horrible at displaying them.  
> I always feel as if all of the secrets I have in store need to kept away until I write more, so I just kept doing fillers and more fillers until I could finally get in my plot. But the result of that made me give up on the whole thing together.  
> I'm so glad that you guys are all taking the time to read this, and to comment, and to leave kudos, because I truly love seeing every single comment in this fic.  
> It makes me so so happy to see that people actually enjoy my writing.   
> I hope I can do something to show my gratitude, like a gift or something haha  
> But for real though, I appreciate every single hit on this book and every single comment and all that.  
> I love y'all, thank you so so much.


	12. The queen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not updating twice yesterday rip

"After this.. right?"  
"After this." Tyler gently smiled.  
Josh felt those happy tingles at the tips of his fingers.

  
The city was quite silent as the neared the end of the bridge.  
The boy looked out the window, fingers against the frame.  
Josh couldn't see many of the dead, wandering around.  
Yet he didn't let his guard down either.

"What's the plan here...?"

"Lemme drive around first. There might be somewhere with resources.. like guns, or ammo, food, even. But this place looks kinda scavenged.. at least from the outside it seems so."  
Josh's hair fell in front of his eyes.

".... what's this place..?"

 

"I'm not quite sure.. we'll just have to see."

 

"We could stop here, I guess."

Josh opened the door, and poked his head through, alert.

Just a few feet away, there laid a stuffed bear on the ground, dusty and torn.

  
Tyler turned his head to the frightened boy.  
"It's alright, come on." He held out his hand for Josh to hold onto.

The boy hesitantly obliged, gently grasping onto the older one's hand, intertwining fingers with his.

He turned away from the stuffed toy, trying not to think much of it.

  
Josh walked through the shattered streets with Tyler, with a backpack on his back, as well as Tyler having one too.  
His was more empty, of course.

 

Tyler stuffed packs bullets found in the ground into his backpack.  
They were in a random building, unsure of what it's use was anymore.  
Meanwhile, Josh was staring at the bloody walls and scratches over the chilling solid.  
He carefully watched his every step, yet he was cautious of where he was going, exactly.  
The hallway got dark, the very end beaming with a fair green and blue light.

 

 

".. alright. You read to start heading ou-.. Josh...? Josh?"  
Tyler got up, wandering around, calling out the boy's name, afraid to be too loud just in case there was the infected.

"... Josh...?" Tyler groaned. "Joshhh.."

He slowly walked down the dark hallway, his footsteps louder than usual.  
He pushed open the door at the very end, and was greeted by the yellowish green grass and the blue sky.  
It was the beginning of autumn.

  
Josh was standing in front of a wall with a pretty graffiti design, covering most of the giant wall.

He stared intently at the textured paint, reaching out to touch it.

Tyler made his way over.

His hand was grasping onto Josh's neck from behind.  
Josh took a sharp breath, turning around instantly in fear.  
Tyler snorted.

He could see the boy narrow his eyes in annoyance, despite the meek hands held to his chest like a little child.  
"Y-you scared me... p-please don't do that again.." Josh's face was filled with embarrassment, and he grumbled a bit.  
Tyler couldn't help but grin.  
"Don't go off on your own next time, okay?" He gently took Josh's small hand.  
Josh pouted a bit, giving him a stare.  
"...." once again, Tyler broke out into a chuckle.

"Come on, baby boy. Let's actually get going."

"Okay.."

 

  
Stupidly enough, Josh didn't stop wandering around.  
He was having fun with himself, looking at stupid things in stories, and raiding wrecked up malls.

 

"Hey Ty!"

"What?"

"Look at this..!"

"... Josh, I think that may be expired-"

"It still smells okay." Josh had a sugar sweet smile planted to his face.  
"There's soap and stuff.."  
"This isn't a date, Josh."  
"But it smells nice.." he began to pout a tiny bit.  
Tyler rolled his eyes.  
"Hmmph. You're boring, Ty.." Josh walked to the area where Tyler was.  
He sat down on a chair, as Tyler kept searching for items.

"Did you get anything?" He asked, turning his head to Josh.  
"Yeah. I um.. I took out the gun to fit more stuff... don't even know how to use it, anyway."

"Want me to show you?" Tyler asked, standing up.  
"N-now?" Josh got excited.  
"Yeah, sure, I dunno if we'd really want to shoot it though. I show you how it works, at least."  
Josh was bouncing.

"I'll show you how to hold it, first."  
Tyler held out his arms and pulled the gun out into the open, looking at Josh carefully.  
"Here. You try it."  
He passed the gun to the boy, and the suddenly, Josh felt more nervous.

"L-..like this?"

"Put your pointer finger on the trigger,"

Josh's hands trembled. He shut his eyes tightly.

Tyler stepped up behind him, and gently held his hands to keep him from shaking so much.  
"You shouldn't close your eyes when shooting someone."  
"S-s-some..someone...?"  
"Depends. If you're in danger because if then, you should shoot them. And the infected too. They gotta be killed if they chase you." Tyler stated, unhesitatingly.  
"And sometimes.. you gotta threaten people." Tyler took the gun from Josh, aimed right at his head.  
Josh was suddenly terrified. He couldn't move one bit.  
Tyler's finger was directly on the trigger.

"... y-....you're playing with me... right...?"

"I'm sorry, there's no bullets in this. I'm just kidding with yo-"

Josh lunged on Tyler, making him fall to the ground.  
Tyler hit the shelves a bit, giving him a small scratch on his arm.  
Josh pinned him down, hugging the older man's chest like he was a child.  
Tyler was stunned to see the boy's fluffy hair below his chin, his cheek against his chest.

"...I-"  
Tyler sat up.  
Josh was so small. His legs are frail compared to Tyler's, and his tiny hands grabbed at Tyler's shirt at the front.  
Petite was the right word.

  
Josh didn't speak to him for the rest of the ten minutes.  
He wandered off, alone, upset at Tyler for prancing him like that.  
His trust almost wavered. He couldn't believe he fell for it.  
He truly loved Tyler.  
Just realizing that made him embarrassed. Tyler, of course, was a guy, and he was five years older.  
And even so, the man was rather cold.  
He didn't talk much about himself, and Josh was being a brat to him.  
Tyler was dreamy. That bit of fluff at the top of his head, his dreary eyes and beautiful eyelashes, the way he towered over the boy..  
Josh sighed.  
They got so close within such a short amount of time too.  
Well, at least to Josh, it looked that way.  
Josh was a dumb little kid to Tyler.  
He wasn't even sure if it was a father or son kind of thing.  
Hell, Josh never had good experiences with his father.  
Maybe Tyler did.

Josh kept wandering until he crossed paths with a woman with curly locks, half of her hair dyed and the other half natural.  
Josh stopped.  
She grabbed the boy, and put him in a chokehold.   
She was holding a gun to his head.

 

 

And this time, he expected that it was loaded.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	13. I'm proud of you.

_'Stay calm. Stay calm. Don't make her turn you into a fool.'_   
Josh thought to himself.

His annoyed expression wavered as the woman before him looked at him disappointingly.

The bottom of her mouth was covered with a gas mask.

".... who are you...?" Josh gasped out.

".. none of your business." She lowered the gun, and started to walk away.  
"I thought you were a fucking zombie or something. Goddamn kid."

"I'm not a kid." Josh muttered. "There's no zombies here anyway, it's all wiped clean."

"Hmm? 'Wiped clean'?" She let out a laugh.

"Really? You think so..?" Her voice was taunting.

"I..I.. I think so..." his voice began to shrivel up.

"Why don't you take another look in there?"  
The woman pointed to a questioning door, the sign on it all worn down and unreadable.

".... I'm.. I'm not going in there.." Josh quivered.

"Scared, huh? You can't even tell if I'm kidding with you or not. But the thing is, I'm not. The worst that can happen is you getting kick up in there. It's all dark."  
Josh stepped back.  
"You're worse than Audrey...." he mumbled.

"Audrey...? Holt? That twerp...?" Her voice lowered as she got to last part of her sentence.

"What about her?" Josh stepped up, she got defensive.  
"She's dumb. That's all."  
"For what...?!" Josh glared at her.

"She keeps running around, thinking she can do something about the virus." The woman said, her eyes looking bored.  
".... huh?"

"She wants to know is it started, and why. Hell, she wants to fix the whole thing. But that's dumb. Pathetic. She's a fucking idiot."

"... what do you mean...? She never... mentioned anything about this.." Josh twiddled his fingers.

"She left you, didn't she? She's stubborn like that."

"..... I don't care if she wants to change the world. If that's what she wants to do.. then she can do that." Josh muttered.

"I don't have time to fight with you, kid. If you want to leave, then you'll have to hurry up. They often start lurking when it gets dark."

Josh looked out slightly shattered glass above him, seeing the sky a brilliant blue, and the sunlight turning yellow again.

".. what about you? Why are you still here..?" Josh asked, still trying to look intimidating, yet failing miserably.  
His voice was soft and quiet, and his eyes were too innocent looking.

"It's too late for me, I guess. I'm just hanging around, waiting for death." The woman said.

"... that's kinda sad.."

"Maybe to you it is. Before this whole shitstorm started, people were a pain. Now they're all dead here." The woman said, her eyes were tired looking and solemn.  
Josh didn't know if she was talking about him.  
"... I'm annoying to you, aren't I?"

"Yeah. Yeah, you are."  
Josh's face scrunched up.  
"It's no surprise at all. Everyone I encounter is annoying to me." She said, as if she knew it a long time ago.

"Maybe you're the one who's annoying." Josh mumbled.  
She laughed.  
"That's real funny. But I don't really care anymore. I'm already bit."  
Josh's eyes widened a tiny bit.

"... you're bitten..? L-like... infected...?" He whispered.

She showed her arm, with a nasty bit mark and a rash.  
"There's no cure, of course. Though, I don't mind going crazy."

"Oh.... _oh_." Josh voice got slightly quiet.

"How'd.. how'd you meet Audrey..?" Josh quickly said, trying to change the subject.

"Do you really want to have a conversation with me?" The woman sent daggers with her eyes.

".. I.. I'm just curious..."

"You should hurry up and leave with your boyfriend. It's just getting darker-"

Something crashed against the door she pointed to earlier.  
Josh was frozen still, his meek hands clasped together near his chest.

 

"I.. maybe you're right..." Josh chuckled nervously as he stepped back.

"T-then.... I'll... I'll go now.."

She didn't say anything.

 

"G-goodbye..." his light voice was quivering as he rushed away.

 

 

  
"Tyler... Tyler....?" Josh looked at the place they were just in.  
Tyler wasn't anywhere to be found.  
Hell, no trace of him, only the gun.

"T-this isn't funny, Ty... I-I'm real scared.." his voice started to quiver again.

He gulped.

"T..T-Ty....?" Tears began to well up in his eyes. "Where are you...?"

He snatched the pistol from the table in the little shop, and rushed out, looking for Tyler.

"Tyler...? Please please.. don't leave me..." Josh felt weaker and weaker as he ran.  
He panted and wheezed, his eyes darting around the suddenly slightly darkened walls.

Behind him, he heard growls, groans, and footsteps.  
Josh kept running for his life.

That woman was right. There were the infected that came out when it got dark.  
He didn't expect a lot though. Not he's too afraid to turn around.

 

"....T-....Tyler...!!!" Josh choked out, his face all pale and his body made up of twigs.

 _'Don't cry. Don't you dare cry.'_  
He forced those very words into his brain as he tried to think normally.

 

With his luck... and only his luck, Josh was cornered.

 

 

 

"Where is he...? Did he wander off again..?" Tyler was still searching around the whole place, looking for Josh.  
Of course, he was no where to be seen. Josh was rather incautious when he began to think.  
Tyler knew that Josh wasn't very confident, and he mostly cried in a bad situation.  
But Josh couldn't help himself. He was still quite childish for his age.  
Tyler wasn't good with kids.  
But it'd still take him a long time before he looses it.

Suddenly, Tyler saw a running corpse at the corner of his eye.  
He quickly turned around, aiming his gun and shooting it two times due to shock.  
"... shit. I gotta find Josh..-"

He could hear a few gunshots from far away.

  
".. Josh...? Josh..!" Tyler began to sprint.

 

Josh's hands were shaking as he pulled the trigger, whimpered as it vibrated into the ground like an earthquake.  
He wanted to drop the gun, and curl up into a little ball.

_'Breathe. Keep breathing.'_

He pulled the trigger once again.  
Josh took out a few of them, but he was still cornered.  
He hated those things.  
He was just terrified of them.

_'Three more. You can do this, Josh..'_

  
He aimed again, pulling the trigger, wincing.

It didn't shoot.

"...n...no..."

He rapidly pulled the trigger, again and again.

"N..no..!! No...! Not now, fuck...!" Panic rised in his chest.

It lunged itself onto his body, grabbing his shoulders.

Josh scrambled underneath the corpse, his arm under it's neck to keep it from biting him.

But it was so much stronger than he thought.

The other ones grabbed his legs.

Josh screamed as he cried, awaiting intense pain and his intestines to be torn from his body.

"Tyler....!! Tyler, please...!"

A few gunshots were heard.

Josh instantly pushed the dead body away, kicking the other ones onto the floor.

Tyler once again held him tightly.

  
"They didn't bite you or anything, right...?!" Tyler was worried.

Josh gulped, sweat on his forehead.  
He shook his head shakily.  
"Thank god... let's leave..."

 

Tyler carried the still boy outside and into the car as he didn't say anything, nor did he move.  
Tyler suspected that he was just traumatized.

  
"... I..." Josh mumbled something.

"S-sorry.. what was that...?" Tyler asked, starting up the car.

"... I took out a few of them... a-and... I managed not to cry at first..." he said, drearily.

  
".... I'm proud of you, Josh. You managed to shoot most of them by yourself. That's awesome. You're getting better." Tyler gave him a comforting smile.  
"I... yeah... I.. kinda am.." a small smile was on his lips.

While they drove through on the road again, the two of them were silent.

 

"... those papers... that Audrey left you with.. could I see them...?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a new goal in mind


	14. Stronger

_"Why'd you stop, Tyler?"_

  
_"... I don't wanna go back."_

  
_"You'll have to. And I can't really do anything about it. I'm sorry." The woman sat in the warm sun, watching her son silently sit on the piano seat, staring down at nothing._

_"Dad hates me. Why do I have to go back?" The boy's back was hunched forwards, and his mouth was slightly shut._

_"Just keep playing, Tyler. You'll get through it."_

_"I'm cursed."_

_"What was that..?"_

_"I'm cursed. I'm literally cursed. With this."_   
_".. now, that's not-"_   
_"I'm a living hell. What if I have to stay with him forever? What if he kills me one day? What would you do then?" The boy didn't bother turning his head, or his body, or even moving one bit._   
_The whole entire room was silent, the sounds echoing the peachy marble floor, and the afternoon sun basking on the two._   
_Tyler's face was ridden with despair._   
_"Maybe you just need a girlfriend or something. Someone to keep you at your job."_   
_"My job can't be dealing with his bullshit." Tyler seethed._

_"You don't know that. You haven't even seen the light of it."_

_"There is no light. Not to me." He shut the top of the piano, and got up._   
_His mother looked at him, eyes hinting with despise._   
_"You're thirteen. You're not getting anywhere like this."_   
_"Stop walking. Come back right now. I thought you enjoyed playing the piano."_   
_"... I do."_

_"... I just don't like to play when I think like this. It sucks. Really."_

_"Whether you find me someone or not, I can't stop hating my life.."_

  
_"God, what do I do...? I'm literally a shell. "_   
_"School is the worst. Everyone has expectations for me."_   
_"And I need time. I barely get any sleep."_   
_"Sometimes he just walks into my room while I'm in bed, and he....."_

_Tyler cringed._   
_The world below him was rumbling._   
_Without the sounds of the piano, and only his voice, it felt like there was an earthquake below him._   
_He tried not to shudder._

_"..." the woman didn't say anything._

  
_"You're scared of him too, right?" Tyler mumbled, his voice was raspy and low._

_"You probably just don't want to get involved, right..?"_

_The brunette tried not to think of any more as he walked up the stairs, and into his room._

  
_"Maybe she just doesn't feel very sorry."_

 

 

  
"Audrey didn't even write this."

"What is it?" Tyler asked.

"Didn't you already see this..? .. it's a letter."

"Didn't understand it. What's it about?"

".... it's.. it's like some weird.."

"Just say it." Tyler kept his hands on the wheel, where Josh was at a lost for words.

"It's from some facility, or something. Like.. about the virus. Where the hell did she even get this..?"

"What does it say?"

"The whole thing was apparently an experiment with animals. Things went wrong, I guess."

"And there's nothing about a cure, I'm guessing?" Tyler raised his eyebrow.

"Yeah.. sadly. I feel bad for Audrey. She's doing this all alone."

Tyler narrowed his eyes.  
"What? I thought she was going with her friends to some place or something."  
"I.. I came across this woman while you weren't there. She said that Audrey wanted to fix up the whole thing like it never happened."  
Tyler sighed.  
"No matter what she does.. I seriously doubt that's gonna happen. Humanity is just going to run out, and we're all gonna die at some point."

"... what about us..? We'll make it through, right..?" Josh shyly smiled.

Tyler grimaced.

"... u-uh... yeah... maybe."

He's promising too much. And Josh is oblivious.

  
"You know... maybe we should help Audrey." Josh quietly said.  
"That's.. not a good idea."

"Why not? What else do we have to live for?"  
Tyler slightly cringed.  
"We just gotta live. That's all. Audrey can do whatever she wants, but if she wants to risk her life on that-"  
"If we don't change anything, we'll have to struggle to live until we loose all of our resources...! So we could use that time to-"

 

_"Josh, you have no idea what you're talking about, what you're going for, and why."_

 

Tyler snapped, his voice low and shaky, frightening Josh for a few seconds.  
He's never spoken like that before.

"How'd Audrey convince you to save me..?"

"..." Tyler shut his mouth.

"How did she...? Please tell me."

  
"Come on, Ty.."

 

  
"... isn't rape the worst thing in the world...? To someone like you.. a young boy who has no idea what'll happen to him, who has never felt so much vulnerability, so much humiliation.." Tyler's voice was shaking.

"She had me from the start. When she mentioned you, she told me you were bound to get fucked."

Josh stared at him, his eyes slowly starting to soften.

"You know how terrifying it was to look at you like that..? Covered in blood, shaking.."

"There's something more to how I feel about this topic. You don't need to convince anybody. I can't let any goat fucker do that to you."

  
Josh looked down, ashamed.

Tyler looked pissed.  
Real pissed.

Josh had suddenly become a coward.

  
"...... I'm sorry.. Ty..."   
Josh's voice was hushed, and Tyler's heart twinged with guilt for raising his voice.

Tyler didn't speak for a long time.  
Josh just sat there, waiting for him to say something. Anything. He felt so uncomfortable like this. Tyler was such a private person. He never spoke out his feelings like this.

Every time he promised something, Josh truly wanted to believe him.  
But after all, he then remembered that before Tyler saved him, the last time someone promised something to him was his father.

_"I'll make it out alive, I promise."_

Josh took a sharp breath, shakily hunching over.  
A chill ran up his spine.  
His lips quivered..

_'Don't cry. Don't you dare ever cry again.'_

He was invincible. Even his mind would fail to tell him what to do sometimes.  
Josh felt tears run down his cheeks as he bit his lip, muffling the crying sounds he made.

"....m...mhp..hph.... haah..." he choked out, tears dripping from his cheeks.

Tyler slowly stopped the car.  
Josh lifted his head, his shimmering eyes looking at him in confusion.  
Tyler reached into the backseat, grabbing his bag.

He shuffled inside, and pulled out a snapback.

Lazily putting it on Josh's head, his eyes suddenly covered with the grey hat.  
Josh lifted it a bit, looking up to see Tyler's face again.  
Tyler wiped the tears off of Josh face.

"You're okay, baby boy. Please don't cry. I'll protect you." He murmured.

"..b-but.... I wanna protect you too...!" Josh began to cry even more.  
Tyler's eyes widened.

"... what? Y-..you want to.. protect me...?" He was lost.  
Josh nodded shakily, his face looking miserable.

"... I... I.... care about you...!" Josh choked out.

Tyler cupped the fragile boy's face.

"Baby boy... y..you..-"

Josh was hiccuping, his hands on Tyler's.

He rested his forehead against his.

Tyler blushed slightly at the sudden movement.

"J-Josh-... hey, I-"

  
Josh quickly backed away, shaking his head and hastily wiping his tears away.  
Tyler was extremely confused.  
He turned the hat around, his hair poking through the little hole.

"... I want you to help me become stronger, Ty."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CLEMMIE CLU
> 
> do y'all get this reference 
> 
>  
> 
> cause
> 
>  
> 
> cause of the hat
> 
>  
> 
> :)))
> 
> no?
> 
> okay :(


	15. He leaked out a few secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rip sorry I didn't update twice yesterday I was kinda busy :((

Josh jumped when he heard a loud sound just nearby.  
The car slid to a stop.

".. who the hell...?" Tyler got out, pulled out a rifle.  
Josh sat in the car, an anxious look on his face.  
He slowly got out, suddenly fearful.  
A bullet whizzed by his frozen face.  
"Grab our stuff!" Tyler called, holding up the long gun, looking for somewhere to aim.  
Josh quickly obliged, grabbed his backpack and Tyler's.  
He looked at his pistol nervously, feeling useless.  
Hesitantly, he took a pack of bullets from his backpack, staring at them intently.

"...how do I put them in...? Crap, Tyler didn't show me that.. did he..?" He mumbled to himself.  
Josh's hands were shaking as he felt a gust of cold wind, his face stinging.  
He sighed. "U-um... okay.. so..." he fiddled around with the gun, looking at the bullets.  
He shakily slid in the bullets into the end of the gun, unsure if he was doing the right thing.  
Hell, how could this even work out? He didn't even know who he was supposed to shoot.  
Suddenly, Josh heard another gunshot. Tyler hissed and crumpled to the ground.  
Josh's heart dropped.

"...T...Tyler...!!"

He sprinted to Tyler's side, crouching down.  
Tyler had his hands over his lower abdomen, all bloody and smudged. He was breathing heavily, his face red and worn out.  
"N-no.. I-I... h-how can I fix this..? W-what do I do...?" Josh was whimpering.  
"I-I could have done something.. I keep failing... I-I keep hurting yo-"

Tyler's voice was weak.  
"L...look... d-don't think abo-bout me right now.. don't let him-"   
Josh turned around, and saw a familiar face behind him, walking slowly.

"... no."

  
"If it isn't the fucking twink. You're with Tyler now, aren't ya?" Brendon grinned, his face all cheery and bright.

"I dunno about you, but if I wanted to save your boyfriend, I'd probably actually do something."

Josh winced, his heart stinging.

"I...I...."

"It's funny. You're still sitting there."

Josh began to feel tears well up.  
He didn't know what to do.  
He didn't know what would help.  
Tyler was slowly bleeding to death right I front of him, and he was being useless.  
So, so...  
Useless.

  
Tyler's chest was inflating and deflating slowly, blood coming out of his mouth.  
Josh quickly shuffled through the two bags desperately looking for some sort of bandage.  
"T-Ty..-" Josh was fishing things out of the bag, and finally took out a roll of gauze.  
He wanted to ask _'Is this what I need?'_  
 _'Will this help?'_  
But he knew it was dumb of him to hesitate.  
He quickly lifted Tyler's bloody shirt, and saw the gunshot wound near his hip.  
Tyler's eyes looked glossy, as if he was slowly gonna pass out.  
"S-stay with me.. stay with me... please..." he murmured, tears welling up.

He quickly wrapped it around Tyler tightly, pressing down on the wound.

A gun was pointed directly at the back of his head.  
Josh stopped.

"Fun distraction, huh?" Brendon sneered.

 

 

"...h...y..you fucker..." Tyler wheezed.

"Don't turn around, sweetie. You know what's gonna happen." He could hear that same sugar-coated sound from behind.  
It disgusted him.  
Josh's eyes quickly darted around the area.

He was going to risk it.

Brendon was an asshole, and Josh hated his guts.

  
He thrusted his head upwards and towards Brendon, hitting him right in the crotch.  
Brendon let out an _'oh fuck'_ before josh grabbed his gun, and hit him repeatedly in that same spot.  
Tyler was astonished.  
Josh aimed the gun right at the very area he abused.  
"Woah woah woah little boy-"

"Don't fucking _'woah'_ me. I'll shoot you right in the balls if I want to." Josh's eyes were burning with flames.

"Wow! So much confidence! I love i-"  
Josh kicked him in the dick again.  
"Y-You fuck...!!" He cried out.

His hands were secretly shaking.  
Josh was so hesitant, and afraid.

"Damn, you hate me that much...? Nobody even got to fuck yo-"  
Josh pulled the trigger.  
Brendon shut his mouth.

  
".... you missed."

Josh's hands were shaking too much. Hell, he didn't want to see all this blood. He didn't want to waste time.

"Ugh, god, are you trying to keep me from fucking people or what? You were small and your ass looked so fucking cute, but I had no intentions of fucking you. I just needed the guns. It was a fair trade. They're dead now, because Tyler shot 'em. Why're you still complaining?" Brendon said.

  
Josh's teeth were gritted.  
"His finger... was inside of me..!!!" He yelled.  
"J-Josh...." Tyler's voice was shaky, and he suddenly sounded sick to his stomach.  
The boy turned around.  
The man was struggling to stand up.  
Brendon tried to take the gun back.  
Josh smashed it against his head, and he dropped to the ground.

  
Josh's chest stopped.

 

"...I...is he dead...?"   
He looked back to Tyler.  
Dropping the gun, he helped him up, letting him lean on his body.  
"T-Ty....! A-are you okay...?"  
Tyler blinked uncontrollably, as exhaled as if he couldn't breathe.  
"I'm so fucking dumb. How the hell are you okay right now...? I-I.. I'm sorry I.."

"Look, Josh, don't worry about it.. first, we just gotta-..." Tyler slumped forwards, dropping into Josh's arms.

_"T-Ty..?! Ty..!!"_

 

 

  
Brendon woke up with his arms tied together on a pole.  
He was in a room he couldn't recognize, but he could see through the window. He could tell the sky was slightly cloudy. Little white bits of snow were falling.

"...I couldn't trust the fact that you're still alive, so I kept you here." Josh's voice was small, but disgusted. The small boy was sitting on the edge of a bed, with Tyler's head on his lap.  
"Why didn't you just shoot me?" Brendon smirked.

".. I don't shoot people. I-I'm not that good with guns.."

"... well.. it's winter now, huh? Tyler's birthday is coming." He sneered.

"... what? His birthday? W-when..? And how do you know...?" Josh panicked, suddenly feeling nervous.

"I know everything about my inmates. I've been lurking around for quite a while. Sometimes, I'm looking for a target."

".. I swear to god, if you lay a finger on Tyler-"

"Geez, I'm not aiming towards him. Plus, he's already been fucked up once. Never got into too much detail about it. ...You know why Tyler got into prison?" Brendon leaned in close.

Josh was hesitant, his hands brushing against Tyler's face lovingly.

".. I... I don't know."

"He chopped up his dad into pieces. He was an insane bitch. Can you imagine that?"

Josh didn't move.  
"I don't believe you."

"No, but really. He did. He had a good reason to, anyway. Sometimes I feel bad. Heard he got abused constantly by that jackass."

Josh's hand rested on Tyler's cheek.

  
"There were rumors going on about him even getting sexually a-"

Tyler sat up instantly.  
Josh yelped.

 

 

 

 

 _"... what the fuck has that forehead fucker been spewing out his mouth...?"_ He growled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's not enough male characters in this sadly  
> I don't look into that many bands haha


	16. Mommy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: rape.
> 
> Poor ty.

"...Ty..?"

 

"... what?" He seethed.

Josh flinched.  
"I.. what Brendon said... is it true..?"

"..."

"T-that.. you were abused by your-"

"Yeah. So?" Tyler hid his boiling expression.

"And.. what else did your father do..?"

"... nothing. Nothing."

  
".. r-..really..? Because... Brendon said that-"

"Whatever the fuck Brendon said might not be true. Haven't you ever thought about that?" Tyler stared daggers into Josh's fragile heart.

"... I.. b-but..."

"But it kinda is, don't you think? It's on your record. Said you've been-"  
"Tell that goatfucker to shut his ass." Tyler turned to Josh, sharply glaring at him.  
"....it's not just a rumor. I can say it all I want." Brendon was grinning.

Josh reached out touch Tyler's shoulder.  
"Ty.. y-you can tell me anything.. I'll understan-"

"Stop it. Just leave me alone."

Josh's eyes stung with tears.  
"B-but..."  
"I-I'm worried.."

  
"I won't judge you or anything, I promise. Hell, I'll kick Brendon out." Josh gently took Tyler's hand from behind.  
If was the first time Josh has ever seen the older man looking so tense.  
It was written all over his face.  
Tyler shut his eyes tightly.

"See? He doesn't even wanna hide it anym-"

Josh aimed his gun directly at Brendon's face.  
He shut up.

  
"... what does your father do to you?" Josh asked, his fingers curled around Tyler's hand.

"... he abused me and stuff. It's not that important."

"I-it is to me." Josh tried to look more confident.

"... I don't wanna think about it..."  
Tyler hid his face in his hands.

"...God I really don't wanna think about it.." his voice cracked.

  
"I-I... I was like.. thirteen. It was really late.. and I was already sleeping, and.. he came into my room, and grabbed my throat. I wanted to punch him. He began to.. like..." Tyler was so hushed at the very end.  
Josh pulled Tyler into his chest from behind, holding him tightly.

"I was being choked.. I felt like I was gonna die.. then he.. you know what? Forget about it." Tyler turned away.

"..... I'm sorry..." Josh gently petted the fluff on Tyler's head.

"God, it's much worse than this.. I don't want to tell you all of it. It's disgusting." Tyler looked away.  
"Y...you can just forget what I said. Pretend we never discussed it. Please."

Josh looked at Tyler miserably.

"... okay."

 

Brendon stared at the ties on his wrists, facing away from the two.

 

Tyler shivered.

Josh grabbed a jacket, and wrapped it around the man.

"Y..you found those?" Tyler noticed the puffy dark blue coat on Josh, long enough to cover up his lap.  
"Yeah.. the only one that fit you was this one.. it's not as warm..." Josh frowned.  
"Well, the warmer one was for you, so it's alright.. sorry for getting mad at you earlier." Tyler turned away.

"... it's okay. I understand that you were upset.. I'm sorry for trying to force you to tell me.." Josh mumbled quietly.  
"Well I'm fucking freezing. You're just gonna let me freeze to death, right?" Brendon groaned.  
Josh wrapped a blanket around the man.  
Brendon's eyes got wide.  
"The hell?"

"You don't wanna freeze, right?" Josh asked, though he wasn't sounding very friendly.

"... I didn't need you to do this.. but okay?"

  
Josh was a pure and innocent boy, caring for everyone he met.  
Tyler got nervous suddenly.  
If he ever really got gang raped... dear god, Tyler couldn't imagine the sounds and cries he'd be making. The torturous expressions and never ending tears..  
He was so tiny, and could barely handle anything.  
He'd be ripped apart instantly.

He's a virgin too. He'd be frightened as hell.  
Tyler could guarantee it.

Of course, he did want to save Josh from the beginning.  
Audrey tried to coax him by her strong words, but Tyler was useless at that moment.  
He was alone, and sad, playing that stupid piano and singing his stupid songs.

Before then, he was used.  
Terribly.

  
The time it first happened was a nightmare.  
He remembered being grabbed by the neck, and his clothes being torn off.  
He couldn't see the face of his father in the dark.  
He couldn't say a single word too.  
When he felt it enter his body, he was shaking. Tears ran down his face.  
He cried out.  
It felt like it just kept doing deeper and deeper.  
Tyler was convulsing, his legs and chest twitching.

 

_"You like that, don't you..? Dirty little whore."_

_"Mph...!! Gh... hgggmph...!!"_  
_His neck was being pushed into the mattress, unable to breathe._  
_His face was turning purple._

 _Hitting his sweet spot over and over, Tyler cried like a baby for the first time._  
_It felt so disgusting. He hated it._  
_It was too much._

 _He felt like he was being torn into two from the inside out._  
_He was seeing things, his vision blurring every two seconds._

 _His father let go of his neck._  
_Tyler gasped, drool dripping from the side of his face._  
_"You like this? Having fun...?" His disgusting voice echoed in Tyler's skull as he kept thrusting into the poor boy's body._

_"N-ngh...n-no.... t-take it.. o-out...!" Tyler gurgled, crying._

_The man was literally pounding into Tyler's prostate, making him cry for help._

_"Dad, please...!!" He sobbed._  
_Something inside of him ripped._

_Tyler was in so much pain._

_After a few hours, Tyler hadn't realized the man who he once wanted to call his father, had left._  
_The door was open still._  
_His inner thighs were all bruised, and there were light blood stains all over the mattress._  
_Tyler couldn't get up. His stomach ached so badly. His breathing was heavy._  
_Tears ran down his face._

_He shakily grabbed his cellphone._  
_Dialing a number, he called his mother._

_"...m-mom... p-please.. please take me back..." he choked out._

_"It hurts, mom... I... I wanna die..." he hiccuped._

_"Mommy..." his voice broke. He sniffled._  
_"M-mommy...!"_

There was no one to comfort the poor boy.  
So he lived through the whole thing alone, which felt like years.

And six years later, he got revenge.

 

Right...?

 

 

 

  
Josh looked at Tyler, seeing him ball up his fist in the middle of nowhere.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how I feel about writing this part.  
> You're still reading this book, right?  
> Please tell me you're still reading it  
> I hope I'm not boring the hell out of you


	17. Kiss me again. Please.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a last minute decision but I want you guys to stick along so the title is what it is and it's happening in this chapter okay you're welcome to those who have been waiting

_**"Mr. Joseph, where the hell do you keep getting all these bruises..?"** _

 

  
_"Sports."_   
_"I don't think that's quite true. Come on, Tyler. You can tell us. You have them all of the place. Your face, your arms, hell, they're everywhere." Jack was wiping down the tables, looking at Tyler nervously._   
_Tyler didn't bother to say anything._   
_"... I...I dunno." He mumbled._   
_"What's been going on, sweetie? Who's been hurting you?" Helen sat down on a chair beside Tyler, her hand settling on Tyler's._   
_"You've been working here for quite a while. We can't just ignore you."_

_Tyler scratched the back of his neck nervously, looking down._   
_The door slammed open._   
_"You fucker!! That's where you've been, huh?! Working here without telling me...!! You little shit..!" The man grabbed Tyler's wrist and pulled him like he was a twig._   
_Tyler didn't bother saying anything else._   
_"Stop! Who the hell do you think you are? Don't touch him like that!" Helen pulled Tyler back, glaring at the man._   
_Tyler didn't say anything._   
_"I'm his goddamn father, that's what! You're leaving, now." The man hissed right into Tyler's ear._   
_Tyler lowered his head._   
_"You're terribly rude.. now I think I know where those bruises are coming from..." Helen narrowed her eyes._   
_"You're not taking him anywhere." Jack stepped up._   
_"Hell yeah I am. He's coming with me, whether anyone likes it or not. Right, cunt?" He looked at the boy._   
_".... b...but I..."_

_"You wanna stay? You wanna fucking stay?! That does it. You're quitting this job."_

_"N-no, please don't make me-"_

_The man bashed his son's head onto the table, and Tyler let out a cry._

_"You dirtbag..." Helen looked terrified._   
_"You still wanna call me that?" The man looked at her._   
_There was cold sweat on the girl's milk chocolate skin. She couldn't speak._   
_"Tell me, little girl, tell me." He stepped away from Tyler, and towards the two in the restaurant._   
_Tyler got up, and pulled the man back._   
_"Don't-.. don't fucking do tha-"_   
_The man tossed him around like a doll._   
_"You're quitting. Now."_   
_"... no. N-...no. I don't want to quit. Beat me all you want, but I don't want to quit."_   
_Tyler's eye was bruised._   
_"I actually like this job. I'm earning money. Why're you still complaining...?!" He spat out._   
_"You're quitting. You know what'll happen to you if you disobey my rules. It'll be painful. Real fucking painful."_

_Tyler couldn't breathe._

_"..... I...I...."_

_"Still wanna stay here? Sure. But when you come home, I'm gonna use the shit out of you."_

_Tyler couldn't help but hesitate._

_".... I.... I'm sorry..." he whispered to the two other people he actually considered friends._

_Tyler was pulled out the shop, the little apron on his body was ripped off and tossed to the sidewalk._   
_"You won't fucking get shit if you work like a little twerp."_

 

 

 

  
Tyler couldn't take it anymore.  
The memories were bullshit. They were painful. He wanted to kill that man seven times over and over again.  
Josh watched as Tyler stormed out of the dusty building, stomping his way outside, still limping from the gunshot.

Josh quietly followed, secretly watching the older man rage.  
It was dark outside, and they only had matches and cold, soggy tree branches to light up the whole place.  
He held a knife tightly, bashing it across a nearby tree, scraping deep against it.

Tyler finally dropped the knife, and began punching it to the point where his knuckles started to bleed with scratches.  
Josh couldn't help but wince as he watched Tyler slowly go insane.  
He was useless.  
Scared, and useless.  
Too innocent for his own good.  
Terrified.  
He's sick of it.

Why is he like this...?

  
Why can't he actually do something that'll help him and the people who he love?

Tyler bashed his fist against the tree, slightly grunting every time.  
The sound echoed through the forest.  
Josh couldn't take it anymore.

He quickly ran over to Tyler, touching his shoulder.  
Tyler turned around hastily, and by instinct, he threw his fist directly at Josh's face.  
The boy doubled over, his nose cracked and beginning to bleed.  
Tyler went pale.  
"J-Josh....?!"  
He crouched down, but before he could comfort the boy, Josh threw his arms over Tyler, rubbing his back comfortingly.  
The pain set in, Josh was crying, but he didn't want to cry because of Tyler's punch.  
Tyler's head was shoved into Josh's chest, and his eyes were wide with panic, his mouth slightly agape.  
 _"It's okay, Ty.. I-it's okay... you don't need to let out all of your anger like this.. I'm here.. hurt me instead.."_ Josh cried, his eyes all scrunched up and teary.

Tyler's breathing began to get shaky again.  
His eyes were glistening, and his lips were quivering.  
Wrapping his arms around Josh's chest, he dug his face into his shirt, the coat covering the sides of his head.

 _"I-I'm so useless, I'm sorry I can't do any good for you, Ty.... I can't bear s-seeing you like this..."_ Josh sniffled.  
Tyler let go of the fragile boy's chest, and Josh lowered himself, wrapping his legs around Tyler's waist, tears and blood coming down his chin.  
Tyler cupped Josh's face in his hands, gently holding him close.  
Their faces got closer and closer.  
Tyler shut his eyes, and leaned into Josh's face, giving him the sweetest kiss he ever had.  
And it was his first.  
Josh felt more tears run down his face, and he couldn't help but smile weakly.  
The boy wrapped his arms around Tyler's neck.  
When Tyler let go of the kiss, their faces were still extremely close, and both were still teary eyed.

  
 _"... please kiss me again."_ Josh's voice was so hushed.

Tyler didn't hesitate, letting go of the boy's face, and gently holding his light body closer.

Tyler let go for two seconds, though their lips were still touching.

_"...holy shit, I love you."_

He leaned in again, and again, and again,

And every time he tried to let go, Josh begged him for another one.

Tyler didn't argue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh wow finally worth the joshler tag lmao


	18. He's mine.

Tyler stepped into the bedroom of the building, seeing Brendon fishing through Tyler's bag.

The two stopped instantly.

"... uh.. why's his face bleeding?" Brendon quickly snapped, seeing the sleepy boy in Tyler's arms, the bottom half of his face smeared with blood, trying to distract Tyler.  
"That's not the point."  
Brendon wanted to groan.  
"You got out of those ties, huh? Still fishing through our shit? God, why the hell did Josh even bring you here..? You're annoying." Tyler wanted to sock him in the face.

"Didn't hurt any of you. You guys have my stuff." Brendon's eyes were staring into Tyler's soul.  
Josh dug his face into the crook of Tyler's neck.

"You let him get nearly raped, you fucking idiot. I don't take that easily."  
"Oh yeah? Because of your dad fucking you into your bed frame? Yeah. Sure. I guess." Brendon said, mockingly.  
Tyler sighed.  
He gently put Josh down into the bed, his hands gently grasping onto the sheets.

"Look. I'm pissed at you, but seriously. You gotta drop that."  
"I've taken it in the ass before. Liked it." Brendon sneered. Tyler grimaced.

"Hell, didn't you guys make out in the woods? You actually like him?" Brendon was laughing.  
"Jealous?" Tyler chuckled.  
"He'd pass out if he tried to take your dick, you know that, right? He's like twel-"  
"He's sixteen..." Tyler was shaking his head.  
"Psh, I don't care. Aren't you in your twenties or somethin'?" Brendon grinned in Tyler's face, exhaling on him.  
"I'm twenty one... I mean, it's not really-"  
Brendon pushed him to the wall, pinning him.  
Tyler's eyes widened as he hit the cold bricks with a thud.  
He could see his dark hair being outlined by the moonlight outside, his face dangerously close to Tyler's, and his leg between Tyler's thighs.

".. get the fuck off me." He grunted.

"....."

"No. No! Hahaha!" Brendon giggled like an idiot.

Tyler heard a gun being loaded.

Brendon stopped smiling, and hesitantly turned around.

  
Josh looked like a pack of wolves. His eyes were sharp and cold, but as strong with emotion as ever.  
In a different way this time.

  
".... you owe me. He's _mine._ Back off." The boy growled, his hand still and steady, and his head slightly tilted to the side.

The blood on his face wasn't making him look any less intimidating.  
Brendon let go of Tyler.

Josh exhaled, and lowered the gun, his face looking more doubtful now.  
Tyler's mouth was agape.  
"...Jo-..."

The boy's feet made little pattering sounds as he ran towards Tyler, jumping to hug him.

".... that wasn't me.." Josh mumbled into Tyler's jacket.

"... your nose is still broken." Tyler pointed out, holding the boy tightly.

"I know.."

"Hold on, let me fix it."

Tyler gently sat down in the bed, and Josh sat on his lap, straddling him slightly.  
The man grabbed the bridge of his crooked nose. Josh winced.  
Snapping it back to the way it was before quickly, Josh whimpered.

"Sorry for punching you earlier." Tyler petted Josh's hair from behind, looking into his eyes kindly.  
Josh's heart leaped.  
"...I-it's okay....!" He smiled sheepishly.  
Tyler gently placed Josh on the bed, grabbing a water bottle and towel.  
Pouring some of the water on the towel, he wiped the blood off of Josh's face.  
Tyler could have sworn that Josh made the cutest expressions in the world.

Josh was sticking his tongue out playfully at Brendon, mocking him for not having Tyler.

Brendon scoffed and flipped him off.

"You okay?" Tyler asked, gently touching the boy's cheek.  
"Y...yeah..." Josh whispered happily.

"Alright. I'll be back after I tuck Brendon into bed."

Brendon averted his gaze.

Tyler opened the door, and forced Brendon to leave the room first.  
When the door shut, Josh suddenly felt empty.  
He took off the coat, and his skinny jeans, leaving him with a sweater and these little shorts that weren't quite boxers. In the dark, the color seemed to have faded off.  
He got up, and rearranged the bedsheets to his liking.

 

  
"I have a plan for you."

"Yeah, daddy?"

"Cut that out first." Tyler's voice got gruff.  
Brendon crossed his arms.  
"If you leave us alone forever, and you don't speak to any of us at all, I'll give you your stuff back."  
Brendon uncrossed his arms, suddenly listening.  
"You see us on the road, don't shoot us like an idiot for fun. And don't you dare try to touch Josh _ever_ again, you hear me?"

"... alright. Deal."

"Good. Cause that's the least you could do."

 

When Tyler opened the door, he could see Josh on the sheets, tuckered out.  
His arms were covered by the long sleeves of his sweater, and his fingers were just barely poking through the ends.  
Josh's legs looked fragile as well. He was rather skinny for his age, which Tyler felt slightly worried about.

He was also quite pale.  
Josh shuddered.  
Tyler lifted the sheets, and gently placed the boy inside, without waking him.  
Josh hair was fluffy and flying all over the place adorably.  
The man gently brushed it behind his ear, and kissed him on the forehead. He could hear his soft breathing up close.  
_"...so cute..."_ Tyler whispered, chuckling a bit.

  
He left the room, and shut the door quietly.

 

 

 

 

 _"Your dad sounds like a dick already, not gonna die." The girl said, hopping over a rock wall._  
_"Hah, yeah, he was. Made me quit the jobs I liked, literally told my only friends to go fuck off... I mean, it's kinda like I had a right to kill him."_  
_"Killed him, huh? I'd probably do the same, you know. I was once in a facility with a bunch of other people. My mom was an idiot. She studied the virus, hoping the find a cure or something. Though she never looked after herself, or me. When the whole place went crashing down, she stayed her little lab, working as hard as ever. She died, sadly, but her files got transferred over to some other place. I heard they went to the military hospital at the capital. But that's pretty far away. Well, nowadays it is." Audrey kicked the dirt._  
 _"You ever think she found a cure?"_

_".... who knows. Maybe. I'll never know unless I go there myself."_

 

 

 

 

 

"The capital, huh...? Maybe that's our next destination."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> josh is getting protective lmao
> 
> Wait until he turns seventeen like he'd be a badass but a lil sweet angel when he's with ty


	19. Someday

When the boy woke up, alone and cold in the sheets, he looked around the room.  
It was the same as yesterday.  
But Tyler wasn't there.  
Josh looked down at his thighs.  
He at least wanted Tyler to sleep with him, even if they weren't at that level yet.  
Josh was fragile. He didn't usually generate that much body heat in general.  
The boy grabbed his coat, and put it on like normal.  
Grabbing a mint from his backpack and tossing it into his mouth, he opened the door, peeking through the crack.

"....Tyler...?"

He stepped through the doorway, looking around.

"T...Tyler... Tyler..?"

 

The man was sitting on a chair, his head resting in his shoulder, his eyelashes sitting just above his cheeks.  
Josh took a deep breath, smiling to himself.

"... he's sleeping... maybe I shouldn't wake him up."

 

Josh kept waiting for Tyler wake up on his own, but as he waited, he couldn't help but get drowsy himself.  
Josh rested his head on Tyler's chest, his eyes slowly blinking.

When Tyler woke up, he noticed the boy, sitting beside him, half asleep.  
He lifted him up on his lap, letting his head drop on Tyler's shoulder.

  
"How long did I sleep for...? Were you here the whole time..?" Tyler mumbled.  
"I was looking for you when I woke up. You were asleep, so I decided to sleep with you.." Josh giggled nervously.  
"Did you sleep well?" Josh asked.

"At first I tried to fix the car. After that... I had weird dreams of my ex and cigarettes." Tyler grumbled.  
Josh pouted.  
"Who's your ex..?"  
"Jenna. Jenna Black. She never actually liked me. A lot of things we weren't through were just a setup by my mother. Later on, she thought I was an crazy guy with a fucked up brain. Kinda was, at the time." Tyler had his hands on Josh's waist, holding him gently.  
"Oh... oh. That's kinda sad.." Josh mumbled.  
"It's alright though.. she's not really with me anymore."  
"Did you love her?" Josh lifted his head.

"... kinda. Not anymore, though." Tyler said quickly.  
Josh nodded. ".. and.. cigarettes..? Aren't those bad for you..?"  
"Ever since the whole virus thing started, people have snuffed out packs of them everywhere. They're mostly gone now. Damn, I hadn't had one in a while."  
Josh bit his lip.  
"T-they aren't good for you, Ty.." Josh whispered.  
"Yeah.. I know. But.." Tyler looked to the side.  
"I don't blame you.. but I'm worried." Josh sweetly touched the man's cheeks.  
Tyler had a rosy smile on his face.  
"You know, you don't usually talk about yourself like this.. I'm glad.." Josh pecked Tyler's nose with a quick kiss.  
Tyler held Josh tighter, kissing him back on the lips.  
It was a pure kiss that lasted about more than ten seconds. Tyler could taste the mint on the boy's lips.  
When they finally let go, Josh still held his face super close to Tyler's.  
"Hey, you know about yesterday, when Brendon pushed me against the wall... where'd that come from?" Tyler raised his eyebrow.  
Josh blushed. "I..I don't want him to steal you from me.. he looked like he was going to kiss you or something.. I dunno.." his face was pink.  
Tyler chuckled. "That's kinda cute."

 

 

"You know, last night I was thinking about something. Maybe... maybe we could try looking into the whole virus thing. I dunno. Just a thought."  
Josh's eyes lit up.  
"R..really?!"  
"Yeah. Audrey said that there were certain files at the capital hospital. Why not go check it out? I guess you were right. Can't really hurt." Tyler wearily grinned.  
Josh was beaming.  
He gasped. "You'll let us go..? B-but how? What about the car..? It's broken.." Josh's voice was drowned out.  
"Brendon only shot the front tires. We could still manage to salvage it."  
The boy had a hopeful expression on his face.  
"Really..? We'll do it..?"  
"Of course.. I guess I did get a little worked up earlier..." Tyler scratched the back of his neck.  
Josh had a sugar sweet smile on his face.  
"A-are we gonna go right now? I-I'll go get my stuff ready...!" Josh wasn't even wearing his pants yet.  
Tyler watched as Josh rushed to his room, grabbing his snapback and his black skinny jeans, packing up his and Tyler's things.

 

Josh was bouncing.  
"What can I do to help out?" He fidgeted, watching Tyler loosen the bolts on the car.  
"Well... could you find another car? Doesn't have to be working, we just need new tires. When you find it, show me where it is." Tyler said, his voice slightly tired sounding.  
"S-sure." Josh nodded.  
"Try not to get lost, okay angel?" Tyler warned.  
Josh heart melted.  
"....." he stood there like a wooden board. "..I-I mean.. yeah, of course..." his face was turning red again, as he jogged through the road, looking for any vehicles. He knew that most of them wouldn't have enough gas, or had a smashed up hood, broken windows, and possibly dead bodies inside, which Josh surely didn't want to see.  
That's why they were abandoned and just left there, anyway.  
The road they were on didn't have many buildings, but the place they slept in.  
Josh assumed it was some sort of business building that was later used for shelter.  
It seemed extremely dormant even when the world was alive.  
The lights didn't work either.  
Well, it wasn't exactly like Josh had seen working lights often.

 

  
"Tyler, I found a car that you could probably use.. I think.." Josh got nervous as he walked up to Tyler, who was popping off the second tire.  
His hands were dirty and black, his nails slightly chipped.  
"Great.. we're doing well so far. After I get the tired in, do you wanna take a small break?" Tyler wiped the cold sweat off his forehead.  
"Alright, that's fine with me.." Josh meekly smiled.

 

Tyler wiped his hands down to get off the black stains.  
"We should start it up sooner or later."

Tyler was quiet, and so was Josh.  
"Is there a.. uh... map of some sort?" Tyler suddenly snapped, turning to Josh.  
The boy blinked. "Uhm.. well... I'm not sure.."  
"That's fine, I'll figure something out.. there should be a sign somewhere though, especially if we're approaching somewhere new. Maryland is to the east, right? Damn, I can't really remember all of the states anymore.."  
"... um... maybe...? I-I never finished school, so.." Josh looked ashamed.  
"... that's okay sweetie. We'll figure it out, I'm sure of it. Maybe the car has a compass somewhere. I haven't really looked into it much." Tyler gently kissed Josh on the cheek, making him squirm a bit.  
"I-I'm sorry for being useless..." Josh pursed his lips.  
"You're not useless, you helped out, remember? And plus.. you're pretty much the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, if you think about it." Tyler said, resting his eyes.  
"..... _oh my god_ , really..?" Josh's mouth was agape, and his eyes were becoming teary.

  
"Well.... yeah.

Compared to everything else. My life kinda does suck without you..

I'll tell you about it someday."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was kinda fluffy lol  
> I'm planning for something angst to happen but I don't know how to exactly ease it into the story rip  
> I'll figure something out tho


	20. Please don't ever leave me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's plausible that tyler needs josh more than Josh needs tyler  
> 

_"What happened, Tyler?"_

_The boy dug his face into his mother's shoulder, not even making a sound._  
_He didn't cry, he didn't frown, he just sat there._  
_His eyes dulled and his mouth shut._  
_There were intense bags under his eyes. He looked like an emotional mess, yet refused to shed a tear._  
_The boy looked at the man in front of him dreadfully, his eyes not trembling, but weak._

 _"... Hello, nice to meet you, Tyler. I'm Mr. Weekes. You're here today because...?"_  
_The woman placed her hand in he boy's head, fingers gently padded against his fluffy brown hair._  
_"He called me a few days ago, and I still can't exactly tell what's wrong. He lives with his father, so I'd be unable to tell." The woman said._  
_"Is he not willing to tell you?" The tall man jotted down notes, his rumbling voice echoing throughout the room._  
_"I'm not sure. When I saw him, he didn't speak at all. He looked like a mess." The woman claimed._  
_"Well, what's his father like?"_  
_".... well.. uhm... uh..."_  
_Tyler knew it. He rarely trusted his mother, but at least she didn't abuse him, or use his body in such a way._  
_The lady knew that his father abused him, and she knew that the boy was constantly getting hurt and depressed over what that man did to him._  
_Tyler had minor anger issues. When he got pissed at his father, the man tossed him to the side, hitting him relentlessly._  
_Sometimes as Tyler walked by the couch, the man would be watching tv. Seeing the boy walk by, he grabbed at his ass, making Tyler jolt and shiver from disgust._  
_Then he'd push him to the floor, like an annoying bully, laughing._  
_His friends would often come by, and Tyler knew to stay in his room and lock the door._  
_Though sometimes, he wasn't quick enough._  
_They burn his arms with cigarettes and record videos of him getting beaten up._  
_Tyler didn't blame himself for getting into trouble, such as stealing money and food, mugging people, getting cigarettes while pretending to be at legal age._  
_He'd go to the club, and drink his troubles and disgusting memories away._  
_Tyler admitted that he was a whore._  
_Sadly._

 _Tyler was sixteen when all that happened._  
_He'd keep his mouth shut whenever he want to the therapist._

  
_Mr. Weekes sighed._

 _"Your mother isn't here anymore. You can tell me about it anytime, Tyler."_  
_The good thing about this boy was that even as a teenager, with tattoos on his arms, the slight smell of cigarettes on his teeth, the drowsy and rebellious look in his eyes.. he wasn't really snappy._  
_He wasn't rude either._  
_Dallon suspected he was just depressed, and had no energy to be annoying._  
_Though, the lanky man didn't bother being unkind to the boy himself._  
_Tyler sat there, shaking his head slightly._  
_"Do you not want to tell me?"_  
_Tyler didn't speak, nor did he move._

_".... is your father abusing you? There's cuts and bruises all over your face."_

_Tyler's eyes widened for two seconds._  
_"Ah, so that's it, huh?"_

 _He wanted to say,_  
_'He does more than just abuse me.'_  
_But if he ever told anybody, he knew there'd be tons of videos of him giving older men blowjobs out there, waiting to be seen by millions of people._  
_Tyler's fucked people before himself, but it'd be mostly out of pity._  
_It made him feel less submissive._  
_And Tyler surely wasn't submissive._  
_Not with the shell of his._

_"Did your father blackmail you into not telling anyone?"_

_".... mom knows.." Tyler's voice was hushed._

_"She doesn't want to tell me either, that's.. disappointing of her, not gonna lie." The man held his hands together between his knees._

_"... you won't tell anyone... right..? Not even my mother..?" Tyler whispered, his eyes genuinely looking sad._  
_Tyler wasn't a fuckboy._  
_Of course, he's made normal friends before._  
_But they all had to go._  
_And it was his father's fault._

_"... no. I promise you." Dallon hesitated._

_"... alright.. well... my father..." Tyler winced, dropping his head down a bit, and then lifting it again._

_"... he.. um.. he goes into my room at night sometimes.. and he chokes me, and takes off my clothes.. and then he.." Tyler was shaking._  
_"He makes me feel so disgusting. And then... when his friends come.. they beat me up.. and they... make me suck their dick.. sometimes they.. sometimes they touch me.." Tyler wiped his eyes hastily._  
_"I've lost all my good friends because of him.. I gotta do drugs to keep myself sane.. I do illegal things. Terrible things. B-but it can't be my fault, right...?-" Tyler lifted his head to look through his teary eyes._  
_Dallon put a hand on his shoulder._

 _"I-I don't want to tell this story again. I don't want to tell anyone else about this. I hate it. I try to ignore it, but I hate it, because I can't. Not yet. Or possibly.. not ever. It'll keep happening.. over and over again.. and I might live with him forever, unless I kill mysel-" Tyler was slowly sobbing into his hands._  
_"That won't happen. I promise you, it won't. There'll be someone to make you happy. There'll be someone to save you. You're worth it. Everyone is. That dirtbag can go fuck himself. You're not a bad person, I can tell."_

_Tyler stopped choking on his crying, but tears still fell from his dreary eyes._

_"Sure, maybe you kinda do really need to tell someone about this, like the police, or-"_

_"They have videos. Videos of me getting fucked into outer space, videos of me choking on dick.. the whole group has 'em. If one gets into jail, the other will post the clips."_  
_Dallon looked to the side, his face looking doubtful._

  
_Tyler remembered the movement of the man's lips, the sounds he made, but the words he spoke were gone._

 

 

Tyler turned to the small boy bounding in the front passenger seat, excited and happier than he's ever been.  
Though, that didn't make him sad.

  
Tyler was extremely happy himself.

Whatever his therapist said, Tyler was glad that it lead to this precious baby boy of his.

 

 

  
"... u-uhm..happy birthday, Ty.." Josh stammered, his cheeks a dusty pink.

 

 

"..... huh?"

 

"Brendon told me that your birthday was on December 1st.. and it's been snowing recently.. so I thought at some point it'd be your... birthday.." Josh hid his face.

 

The look on Tyler's face was unimaginable.

"..... I... t-th...tha-...."

 

"I'm... uh.. no one has ever-... t-thank.. you... Josh." Tyler's eyes were wide, and his mouth couldn't stop stuttering.

Josh giggled at the blush on the older man's cheeks.

 

"... no need to thank me... but you look adorable when you're embarrassed like this." Josh smiled, purely out of love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Imagine tyler fucking josh tho all that anger and trauma would just go out on him and josh would be a fucking overstimulated mess whoops


	21. Maggot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YALL NEED TO COMMENT MORE OFTEN PLEASE IF YOU COMMENT REGULARLY I LOVE YOU UR GREAT AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY AND EVERYONE HAVE A GOOD DAY

"So you know where you're headed?"  
"Yeah. ...well, I have a feeling of it." Tyler's hands settled on the scratched wheel.  
The car started up again, and they began to drive.  
"How long would it take for us to get there..?" Josh asked.  
"Maybe a few hours. It's actually not that long, surprisingly. But it might take us longer due to all the closed roads and such. Hell, maybe we'll just drive through the goddamn forest."  
Josh giggled. "..really..? That kinda makes me excited."

 

 

 

The car halted.  
Josh jolted awake, his body crashing against his seatbelt.  
"W-wha-.."  
"Y-you okay?!" Tyler asked, moving his hand towards Josh stomach and chest.  
Josh took off the seatbelt weakly.  
".... 'm fine..." he grumbled.  
"Okay.. good... apparently we can't go to the capital this way.. I'll try to figure something out, but we can't go through the usual route."  
".... why not?"

"There's literally soldiers blocking the highway. They won't let us in." Tyler began to slowly turn the car.  
Josh looked out the scratched windows.  
Funny enough, he saw soldiers with their dark, bulky clothing and rifles.  
They stood guard at the entrance, with a large sign and a fence.

"... shit, you're right.." Josh mumbled.  
"We gotta go before they think we're suspicious. I dunno if they should know about this. What we're doing right now."  
".. yeah.. that's true. I don't think I would like it either if I found out some random people were gonna go look into my private shit." Josh looked down.  
"Hey, don't cuss in front of me, alright?"  
"R-right. Sorry." Josh flushed.

 

The sun was coming up, and the two hadn't managed to get any closer to the state.  
Josh was sleepy, his head drooping down and jerking back up every now and then.  
Every time they tried, there were soldiers or roadblocks.

  
"... there's something suspicious going on here. I have a feeling they're trying to hide things. ... important things." Tyler muttered, staring at the road with an annoyed expression.  
Josh's droopy eyes fluttered.  
"We're out of gas right now... there might be a few gallons in the trunk." Tyler pushed open the door, stepping out.  
"You wanna come out back an-"  
"....y-......."

".." Josh shook his head. "Y-yes, of course..!" He hopped out, rushing to the trunk before Tyler even started to walk.  
Stumbling a bit, he grasped onto the handle.  
Pulling it down, he saw a few gallons of gasoline, and that same gross lump of rotten flesh from before.  
A few maggots scattered across the trunk.  
Josh yelped and backed away a bit, his hands grasping onto Tyler's shirt as he walked by.  
"...u-..uhm..." Josh looked at Tyler nervously, and pleadingly.  
"I got it, don't worry." Tyler stepped back, and grabbed a nearby stick.  
Scratching off the maggots and the flesh, Josh stood back and watched, rubbing his hands against his clothes as if feeling disgusted.  
Tyler pulled out a gallon of gasoline, the large bottle a washed up red, and the original sticker all white from damage.

"That lady was screwed in the head.." he grumbled as he began filling up the truck.  
"At least she knew what she was doing." Tyler cleared his throat.  
Josh stood still, trying to keep himself awake.

"... s..so.. how will we get to the capital..? If we can't go through with the soldiers..-" Josh looked down.  
"Audrey probably knew something about this. She didn't use a car to get there, so.. maybe our plan is to.. just walk."  
"From here..?" Josh gaped.  
"Well, the damn routes we have to take are all screwed up, so maybe I'll drive a few more miles first. Maybe we should both just go to sleep now."  
"... doesn't sound bad."

  
When the two got into the car again, they both didn't say anything, nor did they move.  
They just stared at each other.  
".. so... um.."  
"..?"  
"I dunno how to sleep with someone staring at me, to be honest. Maybe if you..-"  
"Well.. I'm not as tired as I was before. Seeing those maggots were gross." Josh stared down at his hands, disgusted.  
"Hah.. well.. then.. what do we do? Do we just..-" Tyler began to smile.  
Josh giggled. "I mean.."

Suddenly, they were silent again, and it got awkward instantly.

Josh stuck his hand in his bag, and took out a piece of candy, popping it into his mouth to avoid silence.

  
Tyler looked tense somehow.

 

  
"......"

"How much candy do you ha-"  
"-can we kiss again..?"

 

"... oh god, I'm so so sorry.. t-that was so awkward.. I-I.."  
"No, it's okay, I guess I.. I guess I'm okay with it- I mean.. kissing you again. You don't need to ask to do that, angel." Tyler smiled awkwardly.  
Josh's face was a pure shade of red.  
He timidly crawled over to Tyler's lap, and straddled him, his feet peeking behind his small thighs.  
Josh wrapped his arms around Tyler's neck, avoiding his gaze.  
The older man grabbed the boy's face, ushering him to look at him in the eye.  
Josh scrunched up his red expression, hearing his heartbeat get quicker and quicker.

Soon, their lips crashed, and they began to push against each other.  
Josh's mouth felt warmer than usual.  
Hell, they didn't even separate.  
It was a full on makeout session.

Josh gripped the back of Tyler's hair, and Tyler held his waist, almost as if he was keeping his precious angel safe.

"... what the hell." Josh gasped out, panting as he tipped over.  
"That was.. fun." Tyler mumbled, his voice quiet and emotionless.  
"I want to do it again." Josh sat upright, and leaned close.  
"Gosh, I bet you've never done this before with anyone. Ever." Tyler sneered.  
"But I just did it with you. And I liked it. Because.. it was you. And not anyone else." Josh said, a breathy smile appeared on his face.  
"You're becoming more confident, baby boy." Tyler stifled his nervous laughs.  
Josh wrapped his arms around Tyler again.  
"Okay, I don't want to get an erection while you're on me, so maybe we sho-"  
"... what's an erection..?" Josh let go, his face suddenly looking genuinely confused.  
".... I was joking, but.. fuck it, kiss me again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Josh is becoming hungry for dat dick if you know what I'm saying
> 
>  
> 
> no wait josh look away you don't know what a penis looks like
> 
>  
> 
> ((btw
> 
>  
> 
> I'm a huge hoe for comments, guys   
> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)))


	22. Tremors

Tyler woke up with a shiver.  
He looked around with panic, seeing the windows all white.  
Josh was laying on him, his legs still straddling him, his head just resting on Tyler's chest.  
Josh felt much colder however.  
Tyler gently lifted him up higher into his arms to hold him in an embrace.  
Josh exhaled shakily, his voice small and tired. A puff of white escaped his lips.  
Josh was pale and skinny, short, too.  
It was probably malnutrition.

Tyler gently held Josh up higher so he could carry him better.  
He looked out the window.  
".. what the hell...?"

The snow outside was terrible. The wind was whistling against the car.

"Shit, can we still-"  
Tyler pushed open the door, a stinging gust of wind blowing onto his face.  
He quickly shielded the small boy in his arms, his back instantly becoming brushed over with a chilling pain.  
"Fuck... we can't drive through this.." Tyler muttered.  
Josh shuddered, his sighing now shaky.  
"Ty...?" He lifted his head, and winced. His nose got red, as well as his ears.  
"We should get out of here. We're gonna get trapped if we don't leave no-"  
A gust of wind bashed against the front window, tossing snow back and forth.  
He grabbed his and Josh's bags. The boy was slightly confused.  
Tyler quickly hopped into the snow, his feet sinking into the white.  
Josh cringed, Tyler was only wearing skinny jeans and a pair of regular sneakers besides his shirt and jacket.  
Josh didn't know if he wanted to go into the snow as well.  
Tyler realized what Josh was thinking.  
He sighed. Holding out his arms, he ushered Josh to hold on to him.  
Josh slowly stepped on the edge of the car, and Tyler picked him up, keeping his feet from the ground.  
Tyler pushed the door with his back to close it, and hurriedly sprinted to the nearby forest.  
Josh hugged Tyler's neck tightly, shivering way more than he should have been.

"Where are we gonna go...?" Josh asked.  
"I can't tell. We'll just have to see..." Tyler panted, holding Josh tightly, one hand on the arch of his back, and one below his ass.  
Josh's eyes narrowed at the feeling of it, his cheeks turning slightly purple against his white skin.

"Josh? You hear me...?" Tyler called through the violent wind.  
The boy couldn't speak. His throat was dry, and his limbs were numb.  
"....shit, he's fucking blue."  
Tyler examined the frost on the frozen boy's eyelashes and messy curls.  
Josh was breathing like an injured mouse.  
Tyler opened up his jacket, and gently held Josh's body to his chest.

Josh hadn't opened his eyes yet.  
Tyler held his hand worriedly, feeling a faint pulse.  
Tyler had been running for half an hour.  
Hell, he was exhausted.  
But he got farther than he would have with that car.  
It was stuck in place.  
The snow was just too much.  
His feet felt like they were literal ice cubes, soaked from running around in the snow.  
Josh was no longer damn from melted snowflakes. Now he was just getting covered by more and more, his body heat slowly disappearing to the point where the snow won't even melt on his cheeks anymore.

In the distance, Tyler could see buildings.  
Tyler spent no energy on waking Josh, he had to get there quick.

Bashing open the door and shutting it quickly behind him, Tyler looked around the area he was in. A fireplace, a table, a bar..

Tyler pulled out his very last match.  
Setting Josh down on the floor, Tyler roughly lit the match, and ignited the crusty, ashy, and long burnt wood.  
It began to burn slightly. Tyler crouched down to Josh, and held him tightly.  
He stretched out his arm to see if the heat was reaching him.  
The fire got larger and larger. Josh's skin was gaining color again.  
Tyler sighed in relief.

Wrapping both of his arms around the boy's shoulders, he rested his cheek on the top of Josh's head.  
Tyler stuck out his feet towards the fire. His legs were extremely cold.

 

There were footsteps.  
Tyler grabbed his gun and turned around instantly.

"The fuck do you want...?" Tyler growled, unable to see the full figure.  
The person didn't respond.

"I'm shooting you if you come any closer. Don't even try."

"Tyler? It's you...? Damn, I haven't seen you in years. You still look as slutty as ever."  
Tyler's eye twitched.

".... you came all the way to Virginia, didn't you? It was pretty damn brave of you to kill your dad."

"Surprisingly, I still have those clips of you. You sucking dick. My dick. Wouldn't want that precious boy of yours see them, would you?"

Tyler got up, laying josh against the floor gently.

  
"......you better shut that disgusting mouth of yours. I can do exactly what I did to my dad right back to you. I kill you." Tyler slowly stepped towards the man, highlighted in orange.

"Aw, Ty, I don't think you even remember my name."

"Like hell I do. Don't ever fucking call me that-"

"T-Tyler...?" Josh whimpered.

  
"Josh-"

The man bashed a bottle against Tyler, making him drop to his knees in pain.

Tyler pulled out his gun, his hands shaking.  
He shot the man right in the shoulder.  
The man let out a yell.  
"You shit..!!" He grabbed Tyler's throat, pushing him into the wall, choking him.

Tyler held the gun at the man's stomach.

The man dropped him. Tyler suddenly seemed like the kid Josh was, comparing him to the other man, who seemed to be about forty to fifty.  
He pulled out his belt, and tied the belt to the door, holding Tyler's neck, choking him even more.  
Josh yelped.  
He had dark ragged hair, and slightly wrinkled skin. His eyes were disgustingly captivating and freaky.

Tyler couldn't move. It felt like his throat was pressed down to stick together. His airways were shut.  
Tyler fidgeted, unable to breathe.

"T-Tyle-...." Josh's voice trailed off.

The man approached the small boy.  
Josh's eyes looked at him intensely in fear.

  
Watching Tyler get throw down so easily made him scared.  
Real scared.

"You've got a cute one, Ty."

  
His gruff voice made Josh shudder.

The man instantly grabbed the boy's arms from behind, twisting them away from his legs.  
Josh shrieked as the man tore off his coat, and ran his wrinkly hands under his chest.

"His skin's so soft... so cute and tiny..."

Josh whimpered and slightly moaned in disgust.  
He could feel so much.  
Too much.  
Awaking from the cold has suddenly made him more sensitive.  
The man gripped his nipple, Josh squirmed and weeped, letting out loud cries.  
His eyes were getting teary.  
"T-Tyler, Tyle-Ty-..."

  
Tyler was slightly spasming.

"...wh-...what'd you do to him...?!" Josh screamed in the man's face, which gave him a tight pinch.  
Josh let out a loud moan.  
He clearly wasn't enjoying this.  
The man's hand trailed down to his stomach, and into his v-line.  
Josh was getting sick of this.  
He shook his arms rapidly, almost trying to punch the guy in the face.

"You fucking shit..!! Don't touch me..!!!" He screamed as loud as he could, directly into the man's face.  
The man just got closer towards his lips.  
"Cry all you want, but if you wanna be punished that badly-"  
Josh thrusted his head into the man's skull, bashing his forehead against his.  
The man fell back, and Josh's brain tingled and swelled.  
Though, he quickly stood up, and stumbled his way to Tyler.

  
"T-Tyler..! Tyler wake up, please..!! We gotta get out of here..! We gotta lea-"

Josh felt a cold, heavy object hit the back of his head.  
He dropped to the ground.

 

  
"I might need to show him a few things. I don't necessarily like how close this boy's getting with Tyler."

 

 

  
The young man couldn't hear properly, or even feel his own weight against the floor, and the blood running down his face.  
Tyler's vision was slowly turning dark as he helplessly watched one of the men who terrorized his life drag away his precious angel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the start of a few fights between josh and tyler
> 
> Okay so I know this fic is kinda serious and all but I'm not actually a very serious person like I started giggling when I typed "nipple"
> 
>  
> 
> okay fuck I'm giggling again stop me
> 
>  
> 
> Don't mention it again I'm gonna start laughing
> 
>  
> 
> Btw I have a question to ask yall and if really appreciate it if you could comment down what you think
> 
> How would you feel about the story having mpreg (male pregnancy cause I know some people aren't on board with it)
> 
> So if you feel like the story shouldnt really have mpreg cause it's not realistic y'all could tell me and i take it into consideration  
> Though I might just forget about this anyway but hey I wanna know ur opinion


	23. Pure flames.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: hhghhhghh I bet you're sick of this but there's rape in this so
> 
> I'm sorry ty

Josh woke up, tied to a chair.  
Gosh, it's not like he's ever been in this situation before, right?

Josh just glared at nothing, pursing his lips.

"You're not scared, aren't you...?" The man's rumbling voice echoed through Josh's skull.  
"... fuck off." He grumbled.  
The man chuckled, grabbing Josh's face and cheeks, touching his jaw.  
Josh moved away from his hand, grimacing in disgust.  
The man just kept at it.  
Josh spit at his face.  
"Cut it out!!" He yelled.  
The man wiped his face, looking annoyed.  
"Damn, you're a pesky one.." he muttered to himself.

"Well, today..."  
The man stepped away from Josh.  
"I've got a video to show you. It might show you how disgusting Tyler really is." He said, thwacking the tape against his hand every few seconds.  
Josh looked to the side.  
"Fuck off."  
The guy laughed out loud, his gross sounding voice making Josh cringe.

He slipped in the tape, and waited for it to begin.  
Grabbing the sides of Josh's head, the man held the boy in place, his hair was being slightly pulled.  
Josh struggled against his wrinkly hands, grunting and whimpering.

The video started up.

  
Tyler was on the floor, wearing nothing but boxers.  
Bruises scattered all over his body, and cuts were on his arms, legs, chest.. some were even on his face.  
Josh could clearly see the dark bruise on his eye.

  
_"Get up, whore."_

Tyler was weak. He slowly got to his knees, with dried up tears on his face.  
Josh shut his eyes as he realized one of the other men were pulling down his pants.

"...why are you showing me thi-"

Josh earned a slap on the face, forcing him to open his eyes again.

_"... suck."_

Tyler looked at the camera pleadingly.

_"Now."_

  
Josh could see the dread in his eyes.

_"I said now!! Hurry up, you filthy whore!!"_

Tyler's lips quivered as he wrapped them around the man's cock.  
His hair was pulled.  
Tyler choked, and tears ran down his face.

Josh swallowed hard, his heartbeat getting quicker.

  
"... don't show me this. Turn it off. Turn it off, now."

"You kissed him with that mouth, didn't you...?" He heard a breathy whisper in his ear.  
Josh's eyes widened.

  
He couldn't speak.

  
Tyler began to loudly cry as he took it all in his mouth, trying to get away, but then forced back onto it.  
Tears and spit.  
Josh could see it all.  
He couldn't take his eyes off of it.  
But it was so revolting.  
Josh wanted to leave.  
After about a few minutes of watching Tyler suck dick, which seemed like forever, the man suddenly urged Tyler to face the camera, and bend over.

Tyler couldn't say no, even if he desperately wanted to.  
Josh began to get uncomfortable looking at the expression on Tyler's face.

They slipped his boxers down a bit, and touched his ass.  
Once again, Josh cringed.  
"D-...don't do that to Tyler..." he murmured.

The grabbed his thighs from behind, pushing him towards them.  
Tyler buried his face into the floor.  
Josh could see two different men behind Tyler, both of them not wearing pants.

"...b-...both of them..? There's... there's two of them...? What're they doing to him...?" Josh began to tear up.

Tyler let out a muffled cry.  
He was shaking, his body was shaking.  
His face was red, his eyes were sobbing.  
They just went faster and faster.  
Tyler's elbows gave up.  
He dropped to the ground, face first, moaning and crying loudly.

_"You like that, slut..?"_

More people grabbed at the poor, wrecked up kid, touching his chest and down his boxers.  
Tyler was weeping.

Josh was at a complete lost for words.

He could recognize that hand.  
That hand of the person behind him.

"He was so fucking tight. His ass was so damn good.. but looking at you.." Josh quickly turned to the man, glaring at him.

"You're so much smaller. You're adorable, too. Can't wait to hear the sounds you make-"

"That's not happening. Never again." Josh seethed.

"Oh yeah? We'll just have to see, little boy."

 

 

 

The belt had loosened.

Tyler inhaled sharply, gasping.  
His heart felt like it hasn't started beating again in years.  
He panted, and gasped, holding a hand to his chest.  
After finally gaining realization of where he was, he weakly yanked at the belt and failed.  
Then he slid under it.

"Where'd that fucker take him..?"

Tyler ran through the back doors, desperately looking for his baby boy.  
Finally, he broke through one last door.  
He saw Josh tied up in a chair, and that man sitting behind him.

"Fuck, you're still alive-"  
Tyler tossed a knife right into his chest.  
The man fell to his back.  
Tyler cut off the ties on Josh.  
Though he didn't move, nor did he speak.  
The first thing Tyler did after that, was to shoot the man's legs and arms, no matter how loud he was.  
Tyler was livid.

When the poor broken man turned to see his angel...  
Josh was facing away.

And instead, he was staring at a screen.

Tyler knew that video well.

 

 

 

  
Grabbing the scissors on the bloody, scratched up shelf, he tore the pants of the man, and snipped off his dick with no hesitation.  
The man yelled in pain.

Though, Tyler liked watching him writhe.  
Tyler liked watching scream.  
Tyler liked the feeling of blood.  
Everywhere.  
The floor, the walls, on the body..

  
Tyler grinned.

"Feels good, doesn't it?"

Tyler was delirious.

He really was.

"Y-...you shithead...!!" The man sputtered out.

".... you'll burn in hell." Tyler mumbled, a crazed smile on his face appeared before he tossed the sharp scissors right into the man's cranium.

 

  
Josh was hooked.

Too hooked.  
His face was still, and he looked disgusted.

  
When the video came to an abrupt stop, he looked at the tape player.

  
Tyler stood there.  
His clothes were all bloody. His hands too.  
Josh whimpered, quickly stepping back.

 

"...."

  
Tyler didn't say anything.  
He just grabbed the tape, and tossed it to the wall, it's brittle bits snapping easily.  
Josh looked at him in fear.

 

Tyler dropped to his knees on the cold concrete floor.  
Josh grabbed his bag, and slowly walked up to the shaken up man.

Tyler looked up sadly, and pleadingly.

".... can I please get a hug..?-"

"...let's go."

"..huh?"

"You heard me.. let's just leave this place."

  
"... Josh, I-... what's gotta into you? I-I-"

"I just want to leave. You don't want to stay, do you? Are you stupid?" Josh voice was sharp.  
Tyler sat there for a while, before sighing, and getting up.  
He gently reached for Josh's shoulder.  
The boy withdrew from him.

"Don't touch me with your bloody ass hands." Josh glared at Tyler.  
It wasn't his usual glare.

 

This wasn't Josh.

His eyes were filled with pure flames.

Tyler had to keep his normal deadpanned face on.

But inside, he was dying.

 

  
Yeah.  
That's it.

He knew it.

 

No one really loved him, anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll regret it, Josh.
> 
>  
> 
> Because you'll be seeing colors.


	24. Purcellville.

Tyler pushed his share of food towards Josh again, like he usually did.

"... what's this for?"

"Even though you already had some food.. you still looked kinda hungry, so.." Tyler's voice was emotionless.

Josh's expression turned from annoyed, to suddenly guilty.

He meekly took the cans and half empty water bottle, looking at Tyler's face was a slightly sad expression.  
"...t-..thank y-...." Josh was too quiet. He couldn't even hear himself. He was literally mouthing the words, but Tyler wasn't even looking at him anymore.  
Josh's heart stung when he looked at Tyler, his back hunched over and his head lowered as if he was constantly depressed.  
He'd do that sometimes before they first kissed, but now, Tyler wouldn't look at him in the eye.

 

 

Deep inside, Josh knew he truly still loved Tyler.  
He knew he was slowly hurting him.  
Probably really bad, too.  
He felt terrible, but he couldn't get that image out of his head.  
Tyler getting fucked, Tyler giving blowjobs, Tyler doing all these weird things...  
It's not his fault... but... still...

Josh didn't like it.

 

  
Meanwhile, Tyler had an existential crisis.  
Josh didn't know that Tyler was more depressed than he's ever been.  
Josh didn't know that Tyler was terribly heartbroken by the person who he actually believed in, the person who he actually thought he could make it work with.  
The person who he could actually trust, and could be trusted.  
Tyler really.. actually... truly.. believed that Josh loved him as well.

  
But it started to end abruptly.

  
Tyler needs Josh more than Josh needs Tyler.

 

 

  
Tyler treated Josh like a princess sometimes.  
It wasn't even for attention. He just did it because he loved Josh, even if Josh didn't love him.

 

While they waiting for the storm to end, Tyler started to sing.  
The storm had been going on for a few days already.  
They had to get moving as soon as possible, but the snow was just too much.  
Tyler struggled to keep the fire in the fireplace alive.  
He managed to do it, somehow, despite not having enough matches.  
Josh secretly marveled at how tough Tyler was on his own.

As Josh sat by the fire, Tyler started to sing a bit.  
He probably wrote that song, of course. Since he's never heard it whatsoever.  
That's what he got from this kind of guy.  
Tyler sang beautifully.  
Even in the middle of the song, Josh began to kick his legs a bit from pure joy.  
But Josh felt weird.  
He felt as if he wasn't supposed to get attached anymore.

  
_"Stop singing, it's annoying."_

The words accidentally slipped out of his mouth.  
Not only did Tyler stop singing, but he stopped doing whatever he was doing.  
His body was completely still.  
The joyful wave was gone.  
Josh stopped kicking his feet.

And he felt so terrible.

"..oh.. yeah. Sorry. I sound gross, don't I? Heh..." Tyler laughed nervously.  
Josh could hear the pain in his voice.

Josh looked down, mortified at what he just said.

He desperately wanted to take it back. He loved Tyler's singing.  
It was no suddenly so quiet.  
Josh wanted to cry.  
He just wanted time.

But he was forcefully separating him and Tyler.  
And the poor guy didn't even do anything wrong.

  
Josh isn't patient.  
He's a brat.  
And he doesn't know how to take that info in.  
The fact that Tyler lost his virginity and innocent to older men who raped him.

Josh felt bad, but..  
It was Tyler.

  
Tyler was a tough guy. He was strong.  
He wasn't ever submissive. And even if he was, he'd save Josh.

His eyes were scarred with that actual expression.  
That face.  
That representation.  
This is real rape.  
Right..?

He's seen Tyler cry before, and he was always at his peak.  
He was always rather tense, and quiet.

  
The boy took a shaky breath.

"... the snow stopped. It's getting warmer. God the weather's fucked up." Tyler said, his voice small sounding but loud.  
"Should we start heading out soon..?" Josh murmured, shy to talk.

".. sure... if you can handle it. But try to wear a bit more, okay? If you need me, I can carry yo-"  
"No. I'm fine."

Tyler had this slightly sad expression on his face.  
"Sorry. You don't want me to touch you, right?"

"... yeah, I guess." Josh said, his face bored looking at the sight of Tyler.

  
The two grabbed their things and exited the place, the dead body still rotting in the back.

 

  
Josh trembled, his legs itched as well as his arms.  
His nose was red and his ears were pink, again like usual.  
The boy's mocha eyes bored deep into Tyler's heart, even if he wasn't even staring at him.  
Josh didn't notice, but Tyler felt hollow.  
Josh stumbled, and suddenly gripped onto Tyler's hand for the first time this week.  
Josh held Tyler's hand with both of his like a little kid, slipping on ice and falling into snow.  
"Do you want me to carry you...?" Tyler asked, his voice dreary and slow.

"... o...okay..." Josh nodded meekly.  
When he was lifted into the air, his scattered white feet flung snow everywhere.  
Tyler didn't notice. Josh was just embarrassed.  
At least he didn't have to deal with the damn snow.  
They wandered around, helplessly around the town.

 

 

 

  
The sky turned gold.  
Josh was shivering up against Tyler, sitting next to him as he played the rusty, worn down piano.  
The sound comforted him a lot. Tyler's hands were beautiful.

His face was extremely pretty too against the light.  
They had to stop in the middle of nowhere, since Tyler was getting tired of holding Josh.  
They took a break at a little record store.  
There was a dead body laying around by the counter, though.  
Tyler dragged it out, and Josh didn't complain.

The smell was shit anyway.

 

 

 

Josh woke up with his head on Tyler's lap, the world beneath him running loudly.  
He's used to this.  
Thought he doesn't remember anything.

How'd he get there?

 

  
"... what.. did I fall asleep..?" Josh mumbled, his voice accompanied with that slight lisp as usual.  
"Yeah. We're on a train right now."

"How'd we even get on a moving train...?" Josh narrowed his eyes in confusion.  
"Played around with the circuits. Some guy from earlier helped me. He's in the back right now." Tyler said.

"Lended me a few things." Tyler whispered the last part, as he lit a match and a cigarette in his fingers.  
Josh had an urge to slap it out of his hands.  
"..... oh... I..."

"You don't need to worry about my health. I'm not that important." Tyler said, seeing Josh looked slightly upset.

The boy slowly backed off of Tyler, watching him exhale the smoke right out of his mouth.  
Josh probably looked terrible. He hid his face with his hands and his hair, staring down at the floor with absolute dread.  
Tyler's feet were hanging off the side of the train, near the tracks.  
It was dark outside. Josh was chilly, but he was wrapped in multiple coats, mostly Tyler's things.  
Josh backed from the scent of nicotine, seeing Tyler wearing nothing but a shirt and his usual pants.

Josh touched the coat lovingly around him, rubbing his cold cheek with the fabric.  
Tyler must've been freezing cold.  
Josh looked away, by then looked back once again, timid to talk.

 

Giving in to his one and only love in the whole world, he rushed over to Tyler, wrapping him up in a hug from behind, attempting to cover up his arms and his chest from the cold.  
Tyler jolted, the fingers holding the cigarette twitched.

Josh rested his head into the crook of Tyler's neck. He loved doing it. He always did it whenever he got the chance.  
Josh pulled the older man back, letting him slightly rest on his chest.  
Tyler was shocked to see Josh suddenly acting this way.

  
But he missed it too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a warning


	25. I didn't mean to.

"-..Josh-"

"....."

".... what's this for?" Tyler asked, his voice slow and quiet in the wind.

Josh didn't know how to respond.

  
".... could you please tell me..?"

 

"...." Josh buried his face into Tyler's shoulder.

"... I don't know what's going on in your head anymore." The man admitted, his voice low and raspy.

".. I don't either." Josh said, his voice muffled.

"Do you still care about me...?" Tyler asked, his voice hushed.

"-.. I..-.. I.."

"Let me guess.. you never loved me from the beginning.. right?" Josh's eyes flashed, and he snapped, looking at Tyler with horrid eyes.  
 _"...Just like Jenna."_ The man said once more.

"I'm not like Jenna." Josh spat out hastily.

Tyler sighed, putting his elbows on his knees, away from Josh's embrace.

"If you're not like Jenna, then do you love me, even..? Like... at all....?" Tyler turned around, his eyes strained.  
Josh's heart hurt, but he stood his ground.  
"What're you talking about? I definitely care about you. You know tha-"

" _'Care'_? Are you just trying to avoid the goddamn word?!" Tyler grit his teeth.

Josh stepped back, gulping.

The lonely man turned back around the face the endless darkness.  
The train jumped and fell back down with the roughness of the rocks below.

"... look, I dunno, okay?! When I saw you in that goddamn video, I just thought-"

"You thought what, Josh? What? That I'm disgusting? That I'm nobody? You think that..?" Tyler whispered, his voice was hinted with dread.

"... I.. no-"

"Then what? God, what is it..? What did I do..? I thought that you'd stick with me forever... why'd you do this..? Why'd you do this to me, out of all people..? I actually thought that-..."

Josh was hurt.  
But Tyler was hurt even more.

"I thought that this thing would subside at some point.. but... god, you don't even love me.." Tyler was staring down at his feet, dropping the cigarette straight into the snow.

It was still burning, even.

  
"Stop saying that.. stop it.." Josh whispered.

"......" Tyler covered his face.

"Stop doing this.."

  
"Stop it.."

 

"Josh, who do you think you are...?" Tyler turned around one last time, his eyes slightly reflecting more light than usual.

  
The wind blew hard.  
Josh had a gun to Tyler's head.

  
The man's expression didn't change.

Josh's did.

  
He dropped the gun instantly, his hands rattling against against where the gunmetal once was.  
Tyler got up, with no hesitation. He was slow but unsteady.

"T-..Ty-.."

The man opened the door, and slammed it behind him.

  
Josh was a shaking mess.

 

  
"T-..Tyler..! Wait, Tyler, please..! I-I didn't mean to, p-please T-Ty-"  
The door was locked.

Josh began to quiver and whimper.

"I-..I'm sorry..!" He cried out.

  
Josh smashed against the door handle, desperately trying to get it open.  
"Please.. p-please...! Tyler...! I-I'm.. I'm scared.." he weeped.  
The handle just smashed off.  
The door was still locked, however.

Josh dropped down, his legs failing on him, his arms dragging along the door.

".. I-I..."

 

He laid there for a a while.  
It felt like hours when Tyler finally opened the door again.

And it wasn't very gently either.  
Josh fell back.

"T-Ty...!" He choked out, getting to his knees.

Tyler grabbed his head, not tightly, and pulled Josh to his lips, giving him an intimate kiss.

 

  
_'This isn't right.'_

 

Tyler pulled away, grabbed Josh's bag, hurriedly putting it on the boy.

"T-..Ty..?-"

  
"Y-you gotta go.." He murmured, with a weak smile in the boy's ear.

"H-huh...?"

"The place is littered. There's fucking zombies everywhere, you have to leave..-"

"B-But... I can't.. I-I.. what about you-"

"Don't worry about me. I'm already bit, so I'm just gonna die here anyway."

 

"..... what....?"

 

"I-I'm... I'm bitten, Josh."

The boy's eyes widened.

"I'm gonna die.. whether I try or not.." Tyler touched Josh's face gently.

He kissed him again, and Josh still had that broken expression on his face, like a record player.

Josh felt warm in Tyler's embrace.

A few of the infected were stumbling over towards the door.

"T-Tyle-"

"I love you, baby boy. I love you.. please don't ever forget that.. please don't ever forget about me, okay..? I love you more than everything in the _goddamn_ world." Tyler was smiling sadly at Josh.

Tears streamed down the boy's face.

Tyler kissed him again, and again..  
Just like that day it first happened.  
And Josh wasn't even begging for it anymore.  
When Tyler finally had to separate from Josh, the boy reached for his hand, but missed.  
A man in a bloody shirt and tie grabbed Tyler's shoulder, pulling him back towards his nasty rotten toothed mouth.

  
"T-Tyle-"

The door shut, as Tyler stood against the wall, blocking anyone from coming through to Josh.

  
_'Please run, angel.'_

 

 

 

Josh hopped off the train, crashing into the snow and a tree.  
His eyes were dripping with tears. His lips were quivering, the tingle still on his face from Tyler's kisses, almost as if he was still there.  
Josh sobbed into his hands.

He watched the train screech as it attempted to stop.  
It tipped over, falling down into a pit, shattering.

 

Josh stood there, his chest hollow, his head hurting,

  
"T-..Tyler..."

 

"I... I love you.. no, no wait, please.. Ty..-"  
He croaked out.

 

Tyler.. was dead.

 

"B-but...." Josh dropped into the snow, not even caring about his temperature.

"... but I love you.. I love you too-.. god, I never told you, I'm so so sorry, Ty...!!" He sobbed, his voice cracking.

  
Josh couldn't stare anymore.  
He wanted to run.  
He had to run.

 

 

So he did.

  
He sobbed as he stumbled, looking for something to grasp onto.

Preferably Tyler.

  
But there was nothing left now.  
It was all his fault.  
Everything.  
He ruined it all.  
He ruined every single last bit of his happiness.

His precious other half, his one and only..

Tyler was gone, goddamnit.  
Tyler was dead.  
He got bit, and now his body's all crushed under that pressure.

Josh couldn't look at that.

Josh was alone.

Josh was at square one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A C I D .


	26. Can I get a hug?

Josh's hands quivered as he held the gun, aiming at a bird.  
The bird stopped loving, at it stared at him, right in the eye.  
Josh was breathing heavily.

Weakly pulling the trigger, his hands rattled again, missing completely.

Josh dropped to the floor, face first into the snow.

He curled up into the ball, trying to ignore his stomach screaming at him.  
He began to start crying again.  
God, nowadays it was just so suddenly easy.  
He didn't even fight his emotions. He just started bawling right on the ground.

"T-..Tyler... I'm s-sorry..-" he hiccuped, shivered in the snow.  
"P-please come back to me..." Josh's head sunk deep.

"...p-pleas..e..." he croaked, his throat dry and his hands red with the cold.

  
His eyes slowly closed as he slipped into unconsciousness.

 

 

"Hurry, hurry. The kid's too small. He's gonna freeze."

"Shit, doesn't look like he's eaten anything either.."

Josh heard running footsteps around him, a female voice, and a male voice.

A man was carrying him, while the woman was beside beside him, checking on the boy every now and then.  
It was dark.  
Josh was still. He was unable to move.  
His body felt like blocks of ice.  
His stomach hurt badly from the lack of food. His bones were so brittle and cold, like an icicle.

Josh could barely lift his eyelids.

  
"...h-...hu..rts..." he mumbled, his lips purple, and his eyes extremely tired looking.  
"I know, kid, were being you somewhere safe, alright? Don't worry about it, I promise." The woman said. Josh vision was blurry. Everything was blurry.   
And he wished he was dead, with Tyler..  
He was in the verge of death for sure.

He couldn't control how much his body worked.

  
Josh shut his eyes, and lost all the energy to be awake.

 

 

 

  
The boy's heard things, smelled things, and felt bed below him.  
He weakly peeked through his eyelashes, breathing heavily.  
He was much more warm now, though, his body was still extremely sore.

  
"He's awake." The man said, watching the boy carefully beside the bed.

Josh couldn't speak. His stomach was screaming at him again.  
He winced.  
"He looks like he hasn't had food in days.. can he even talk..?" The woman was a bit farther in the room, it seemed.

"... I don't think so.."

Josh blinked weakly.

"I'm gonna get get him some soup and see if he can talk later on."   
The man walked away, and the woman walked closer to the boy.  
Setting down the bowl on the bed table, she could see his tiny, blue hands grasp for the soup, his eyes pleadingly begging for food.  
She noticed the tears in his eyes.  
Looking at the spoon, she propped up the weak boy.  
To her, he was almost like a little kid.  
Small, and vulnerable.  
She began to feed him the soup bit by bit.  
Josh took it hungrily, his body slightly broken and brittle.  
When he finished the soup, his head dropped to his chest.

"...th-..thanks..." he barely whispered, but somehow, the woman understood.

"What's your name..? And.. how old are you..? Shouldn't you have someone with you.?" The woman asked.  
Josh winced at the last question.

"... I-I'm.. Josh... I used to have someone else with m-me.. b-but.. t-they're dead now.."

"I'm sorry.. I'm probably annoying you right now..." he hiccuped.  
"W-..what's.. your name...?"  
".. Ashley. But you can call me Halsey. And.. no, you're not annoying, promise."  
Josh nodded solemnly, his cheeks begging to get wet with tears.  
"We'll take care of you for a while, I guess. Take care. I be with Ryan." The woman got up, walking away.

Josh warily watched as her hair flew behind her.

He laid on his back, hands on his stomach.  
Grabbed the blankets beside him, he hugged the soft fabric tightly.

He's still a tiny bit hungry.

  
Usually Tyler would give him as much food as he needed.  
Josh blinked dreadfully.

Tyler was so sweet to him.  
Too sweet, even.  
Josh was a brat. How the hell could anyone treat him so kindly..?  
Tears ran down into the blankets.  
And why didn't he ever tell him that he loved him back..?  
Josh turned into a asshole.

  
No,

  
Josh was always an asshole, caring about himself and no one else.  
His father, his mother, his friends..

His love..

Josh rubbed the back of his head, his eyes red and puffy from crying.  
He tried to forget about the fact that Tyler was gone. Sometimes he can still feel that tingle on his lips even after weeks of him not being beside him anymore.

  
"..t-.. _Tyler_.."

Digging his face into the blankets, he kept his sounds dead.  
He opened his mouth.

  
".... I-..."

  
The very days that he was alone, Josh hated himself.  
He hated himself more than anything in the goddamn, blood loving world.

He stumbled out of bed, crawling to the kitchen.  
His legs felt woozy, and his mind felt kicked over.  
His hand shuddered as he reached over.

  
A knife.

He didn't care anymore.

If Tyler's dead, then he'll never be able to forgive himself.  
He's scared. He's an idiot.  
Sliding the knife across his wrist, he felt it sting.  
Blood squeezed through the slit in his skin.

  
"... another one..."

  
"... another one.."

"..a-a...."

  
"aah..." he sniffled, and dropped the knife.  
He heard it hit the ground, and slid across the floor.  
He sobbed into his hands.

"T-...Tyler... Tyler please....!" He choked out.

He wanted to feel someone's warm arms hug him with love and appreciation, even when he didn't deserve it.  
He longed to feel those very arms on him again, around his arms, around his chest, on his waist..

On his... face.

 

  
"I... I want a hug..."

 

Tyler's dead.

Hell, Josh never gave him love when Tyler asked, right?  
It's all his fault for killing Tyler.  
It's all his fault for ruining everything.

  
He began to slowly stumbled into the other rooms.  
The building appeared to be an apartment.

A few people were sitting on the ground, snorting up a white power, and injecting themselves with things.

"Hey.. who's that..?"

"That's a kid they saved, I think. You been crying?" One man asked the small boy.

"...I-..." he sniffled.

"Tell me, what do you want the most right now?"

 

"... I.."  
This was suspicious.

"... I want Tyler.." he whispered quietly.  
"Huh?"  
".. Tyler.."

".. Rodger, hit him up with acid."

".. acid..?" Josh backed up.  
"LSD. It'll make you feel better. Promise."  
Josh was gullible.

"... I-I... okay..."

They handed him a few little bits of paper, which looked like those temporary tattoos you'd find in cereal boxes.

 

 

 

 

"Let 'em dissolve in your mouth. I'm sure you'll be seeing your 'Tyler' soon."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yoinks:)


	27. Good trip.

Josh didn't feel anything at first.

Then it started to tickle him.

  
"... h..hah..aaha...huh...?" Something fuzzy was around his neck, his chest.. his thighs..  
He felt vulnerable.

 _"Let it k i c k  i n..."_  
The voice began to get distorted.  
Josh began to quiver.  
He felt like he was being touched everywhere.  
His vision turned into random colors. It hurt his head.  
Suddenly, a zombie stood before him. He yelped, and scrambled back.

 

It had the face of a man he once knew.

  
Tyler.

 

  
He screamed. It was broken. It was distorted.  
Everything was burning.  
Josh cried.

  
Suddenly, he felt someone hold him gently, rubbing circles into his back.  
Everything turned white.

He sinked into the body.  
_"... it's okay.. baby boy.. it's okay.."_

The voice sounded slightly off.  
Josh weeped at the sound of him.

"... I-... I love you... T-Ty..." he gurgled through his drool.  
"I-I'm... I'm so sorry.. 'm s-sorry.." tears streamed down his face.

"I miss you...." he squeaked out.

_"I'm here now, angel. Don't worry."_

  
Sobs escaped his mouth.  
He was smiling for the first time in what seemed like forever.  
He rubbed his cheek against Tyler's chest, and he desperately tried to get the most realistic feel of him.  
He looked up.

 

Tyler was smiling nervously, his face..

  
Was just.. so.. pretty.

Josh began to shudder.

"T-..Tyler...."  
he desperately missed Tyler's smile. He missed it so so much.  
He needs this drug.

  
He'll need it forever.

  
He needs to see Tyler.

 

  
Tyler sat the boy in his lap, hiding his face in the boy's chest.  
Josh felt so happy right now.  
Just so happy.  
Tyler.  
Tyler was here.  
Tyler was with him.  
And he needed Tyler.

 _"You cut yourself, baby..?"_ Tyler asked, looking down at the boy's wrist.

"... mph... I'm sorry... m-missed you so much..." Josh weeped, covered one eye with his free hand.

Things aren't supposed to make sense.

  
Tyler touched Josh's face gently.

His hand disintegrated into nothing but blood and flesh.

Josh's eyes widened.

_"I love you more than anything in the world."_

 

"T-Tyler, no...!!"  
Josh pulled the man into a hug, his whole arm now gone.

  
"I love you, please don't leave me..!! Please..!!-"

  
Josh was hugging nothing but a revolving lump of muscle, flesh and blood, with some bits of bone.  
He couldn't stop crying.  
Nor could he let go.

  
"C-come back..." he blubbered.  
"I-I... need you..."  
He dropped to the ground, and everything disappeared, as if on command.  
Josh sobbed as he wandered around the dead universe, desperately crying for Tyler.

  
He wished he was home with his father, eating curry or something.

He wished he was back flying airplanes with him again.

He wished he had Tyler with him.

Oh god, he wanted that more than anything in the world.  
He needed it.  
He needed these dreams. These visions. Whether they were real or not.  
He needed them so so much.

Josh was such a mess when he was alone.

 

 

 

 

"Shit... he's... he's tripping."  
The woman watched the boy go through little tremors and weeps.  
He's crying.  
He's crying, quietly.

  
"T-Tyler... Tyler..." he whimpered, over and over again.  
His pupils are dilated, his body is pale.  
He feels sick to his stomach.

He can't get up on his feet.  
Halsey grabbed his arms, and gently pulled him up.

"The fuck did Stan give you..? Acid..?"

Josh was blubbering.  
"I wan' go home.. 'm sleepy... h-help.. c-can't..-" he stumbled.

"Alright, kid... I know... n-now come on-"

  
"T-Tyler... I wanna see Tyler.. I lo' him.." he giggled.

"... I didn't kiss him yet.." he mumbled.

"Come on.. you're saying weird things now. Let's get you to bed.. god, you're too fucking small to handle that shit.. how many pieces did he give you...?" Halsey stopped.  
"S-seventy five..." he murmured out of nowhere.

".. forget about it. Let's go to bed. Don't go anywhere after I tuck your ass in, okay?"

He giggled.  
"O-okay..."

Josh took off his coats.  
He didn't move after that. Halsey pushed him onto the bed.

"Eep-"

She kicked his legs onto the bed as well.

She practically threw the blankets onto him.

"Stay in here, and stay in bed. No matter what. Okay? Okay." She grabbed the door.

"... b-but... s-...spiders.."

"There's no spiders, Josh. Trust me. You're just tripping out."

 

The door slammed shut, and Josh was all alone again.

  
The colors had started to wear off.  
Josh was blinking.

  
"... I... shit, what the fuck...?"  
His head hurt the hell.

  
Daylight came.  
Josh stayed in the bed the whole night, crying and mumbling to himself.  
Most likely about Tyler.

"... that's right... I... I saw him. He was right in front of me.." he slowly stepped out of bed, but instantly dropped to the ground.  
His body was exhausted, and his mind was churned like butter.  
He felt like he was turning around and around, unable to stop.

"Damn drugs.." he mumbled, as he dragged himself up.

Though, he saw Tyler.

Right..?

  
That's all that matters.  
But god, that wasn't even the real Tyler. It was just his mind.  
What would Tyler think? He could be hating Josh's guts for all he knew.  
But Tyler was dead.  
And Josh would never see him again, nor would he ever talk to him.

Feel him.  
Hear him.

  
He's dead. He's real dead.  
And Josh is alone, in a drug lord's apartment, with groups of people who come to snort cocain, and to get shots of heroin.  
Josh hadn't tried all of them yet, but..

LSD was his favorite, he could say.

All Josh had to do was to hunt prey, and survive, sharing with the others.  
That way, he could get the blotters.  
That's the situation, right..?

You could say he's getting addicted.  
He didn't care if it was unhealthy, as long as he could see his loved ones..  
As long as he could see Tyler..

  
He'd be okay.

 

He'd be alright.

  
He'd be...

  
Happy...?


	28. Help me, god, please.

"... c-...can I get some more..?" Josh gave his best puppy dog eyes, fluttering his eyelashes innocently.

The man narrowed his eyes, grabbing a pinch of the little papers, dropping them in a bag.

"Can't give you too much at once, Josh. Sorry 'bout that."  
The shorter boy sighed, and took the the little plastic bag.  
".. alright..."   
at least he managed to get them. And a few more than usual.  
That's more than enough to get him tripping like hell.

  
Josh wasn't that addicted.  
He had a few everyday.  
Okay, maybe he was now addicted to them.  
But it was his only source of.. 'communication'.  
He liked seeing his old friends, his family, and sometimes Tyler.  
God, he loved seeing Tyler.  
Josh didn't know who he wronged the most, but seeing Tyler's face made him double over and start bawling in his mind.  
He could feel his larger hands, his smooth arms, his beautiful face...  
Sometimes Josh would just randomly touch Tyler's face, as if he hadn't seen a human being in years.  
And Tyler never responded.

Every night Josh saw him, he started to talk less and less.  
Josh never complained, however.  
Just seeing the man made him happy, whether it was real or not.  
Sometimes, he'd have visions of him and Tyler, going on regular shopping dates, buying chocolate, getting stuffed animals..  
Cheesy, it was.

And.. extremely colorful.  
The world was a hundred times more saturated with the drugs than with nothing.  
Without the LSD, Josh was nothing but a broken body, broken heart, broken circuits..

 

  
Josh didn't expect it to happen.  
But sooner or later, Tyler's kisses began to wear off.  
Josh couldn't feel anything.  
This was wrong.  
Everything was wrong.  
Tyler's eyes were black and bloody.

 

 

This isn't Tyler.

 

 

  
Josh's head smashes again the wall.  
No, no.  
Who cares if it's not Tyler..?  
If you see him, you get him... right...?

Maybe Josh is taking this too far.

 

Then where is the real Tyler..?

 

Josh sulked, his body dropping to the ground.

  
Dead, that's where.

  
Every night.  
Every day.  
Tyler slowly stopped communicating with the poor boy.  
Miserable, he was.

It came to the day where Tyler didn't even smile at him anymore.

 

"..... Ty....?"

  
"..."

"T-Ty... Ty..." Josh was pawing at the man's back, hoping for any response.

  
_"... I hate you."_

Josh stopped instantly.

"...h-..huh...?"

_"I hate you. You're terrible. I can't believe you'd still think I love you after what you did to me."_

Josh whimpered.  
"N-no.. I-I love you... I.. I'm sorry, Ty, I-I'm so sorry...-"

_"'Sorry' my ass. You left me so easily for nothing."_

"T-Tyler..." Josh's voice cracked.

  
_"I hate you. I'll always hate you. Your parents hate you too. Your old friends, everyone is dead because of you, including me."_

Josh was sobbing frantically on the ground, his breathing loud and heavy.

_"You don't deserve to live."_

Josh screamed and cried, looking down at his blurry, red hands.

  
_"No one will ever love you."_

 

  
Josh lifted his heavy head.

Tyler was gone.

Everything was gone.

 

Josh broke down, his body convulsing.  
Covering his face with his hands miserably, he kept crying and crying, begging for Tyler to come back and forgive him.  
Josh hurt.  
Everything hurt.

The boy was a mess.

  
Josh doesn't feel weightless anymore. He feels like ten boulders.  
He wants to die.  
He wants to die so badly.  
He wants to feel the tingle on his lips again.  
He want to feel him.  
He wants Tyler.  
But... Tyler...

 

  
Tyler hates him.

  
Everyone was asleep.  
Josh stumbled out of bed to the kitchen, and grabbed a knife.

Sliding it across his wrists, he winced, watching the blood.

He was still tripping a bit.  
Josh was crying frantically, trying to keep quiet.  
He hyperventilated like never before.

 

 

 

 

 

_"Wear this."_

_"Then no one will see your face. No one will need to see what happened to you."_

_".... is it that bad? Can't be that bad."_

_"It isn't."_

_".... I'll take the mask anyway."_

 

 

 

Josh looked like a mess.  
His eyes were red and puffy, along with his nose and cheeks from crying all night.  
He held it back while he was hunting, however.  
He kept missing today.   
He knew what was going to happen if he kept missing.

No food.  
No share.  
No trade.  
No drugs.  
No break.  
No release.

  
Though, Josh tried to ignore it, and focus on the target instead.  
Suddenly, someone grabbed his neck, and pulled him into the forest.  
He didn't scream.  
He was use to this.

"Josh..! My god, why the hell are you here..? Gosh, I haven't seen you in forever, it feels."

The snow is starting to melt nowadays.

".... Audrey...?"

"Yeah. It's me. Hell, you look like shit right now. What the hell happened..?"

"And... why're you alone..? Where's Tyler..?"

  
".... Tyler's dead." Josh mumbled, his voice emotionless and solemn.

"... oh... man. How'd he-"

"He sacrificed himself for me."

Audrey didn't say anything.

"I hurt him. I hurt him too much." Josh muttered.

"Can't even see him anymore without.. without the colors..." Josh looked down at his gun.

".... the colors..?"

"'miss him a lot. He kissed me, and.." Josh held his hand to his cheek.

"... maybe I shouldn't tell you, huh..? You'd get weirded out."

"Wait.. you and Tyler.. fell in love..?"

"... yeah... and... I hurt him.. he's dead because of me. I'm shit." Josh turned around.  
"Hold on. Don't leave yet. Why're you all the way in Virginia?" Audrey asked.

"... we came after you. We knew what you were doing, and we had nothing better to live for..."

"... shit. Then... you wanna leave this place? We'll make it to our original goal."

"I thought I was too weak."

"You're clearly not weak anymore." Audrey sputtered.

Josh suddenly gasped out.  
"I-I... I don't deserve it... sorry..-"

"What the hell are you even going on about? It doesn't apply to who deserves anything or no-"

"N-no.. I-I need the.. I need the... things."

"..." Audrey narrowed her eyes.  
"I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what that is."

  
".... d-...drugs..."

"What drugs?"

  
"... l-...LSD..." Josh stammered.

"Show me."

  
Josh hesitantly reached into his backpack, and pulled out a plastic bag.

  
"N-now.. c-can I leave...?"

"Why do you take that shit, huh? Tell me. Tell me why, Josh." Audrey snapped.

"... I-I..."

"I miss him...." Josh looked down.  
Audrey's glare barely softened.

"Josh, I think you should go with me."

"Why'd you change your mind all of a sudden..? I thought you left me." Josh looked to the side.  
".. you can't just take these drugs, Josh. That's not you."

"I'm not me without the people I care about...!" Josh's voice cracked as he yelled, his sounds tearing with pain.

"... Josh-"

"Mama and papa are dead...! My friends are dead...! Everyone I knew is dead...! T-...Tyler's... Tyler's dead...!" He choked out.

"And you know what makes it better...? I killed them all...! I killed them all, because I was a weak brat...!!" Josh screamed, his voice shaking.  
"I'm stupid..! I'm selfish...! I don't understand why I get all the chances to live...! I don't deserve to live..." he began to cry at the end of his sentence.

"I-I can't breathe..." Josh weeped, as he dropped into the ground.  
Audrey stood there.

"Then make it worthwhile. Who cares if you don't deserve it..? You've had it from the beginning. And you just gonna live through it." Audrey crouched down in front of the poor boy.

"..... I just want him back......" he whispered.

  
".... come along with me, Josh. We can make life better, as long as we continue to live. We can figure out this whole virus shit, and fix it all. No one will die like they did anymore. I swear."

  
Josh had tears running down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But who is the masked man...?


	29. Didn't go so well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My writing's starting to get bad :(

"I-I dunno.. why do you suddenly want me to come with you...?" Josh stammered.  
Audrey looked at him, impatient.

"... I.. fine. God, I tell you the truth. I need someone.. to be a decoy.. I guess.."

"... decoy..? Hah, you wanted to use me again? For distraction..?" Josh laughed bitterly.  
"We'd make it work. Josh, I don't care about your feelings right now."  
Josh bit his lip.  
"I don't care about you, I don't care about your sadness."  
"But that's just me. If Tyler was here, he'd definitely care, wouldn't he?"  
Josh whimpered.  
"But he's not. So... you just intend to sit here, and wait away your days, getting high, tripping out.. dying eventually, knowing that Tyler's not here. I'm not a very kind person, Josh."

"What would Tyler want?"

  
".... I... you're just trying to make me come with you."

"I know that. I'm not stupid."

Josh looked down.

"...but I need the-"

"You're addicted.. damn."

"I.. I only want to see Tyler.."

"You're pathetic." Audrey laughed.

"Well, I'm sorry." Josh's droopy eyes gazed down.

  
"Tyler would have been with me. We were planning on seeing what was going on with the virus, and what they were doing. And.. then we kissed.. I-it was actually really nice, you know...? Tyler loved me more than anything in the world. And I felt so happy around him. I loved him too. He was the best person in the world to come into my life. I've been empty for most of it. My parents were unable to talk to me.. my friends.. were all gone after I dropped out of school.. I was alone.. and even through this, I met Tyler. It's weird, isn't it...? For me... to suddenly fall in love with the man you dragged to save me.." Josh mumbled, attempting to smile at his hands.  
He was sitting on a bench, while Audrey was sitting on the cold grass.

".. to be completely honest.. you were stretched to him on the first day. I'm not that surprised."

".. really..? Haha.." Josh laughed bitterly again.

"... I feel lonely without him.. but.. you stick around.. right..?"

".. sorry... I plan on leaving the whole entire place after the whole thing blows over."  
"This'll never blow over. God, it's a fucking virus-"  
"Yeah, wow, can't believe you managed to convince Tyler to come with you to come get me."  
Josh lowered his head in shame.

 

 

"You plan on coming along?"  
"... yeah... I guess.."  
"Good. Could you please get rid of that bag first?"  
"... I-I... no.. I'm sorry.. I can't.. I-I need it to stay sane...-"

"Josh? Who're you talking to back there..?" Halsey walked over, seeing Audrey towering over the boy.

"... who's she?"

"A friend. Though, she left me because I was weak." Josh snapped.  
Audrey snorted.   
"You seriously wanna stay and get high?" Audrey scoffed.  
"... I... I mean.."  
"You've changed. Surely. Can't believe some kid like you would be doing drugs. I bet Tyler would hate it."  
"Tyler's dead. He's not coming back. So it doesn't really matter no-"  
"That behavior is what got him killed. Cut it out."

Josh felt something painful twinge in his chest.  
"... I..I'm sorry.."

"Does Josh want to leave with you? Or are you forcing him?"  
"Tell her, Josh. You wanna come or not?"  
Audrey looked mischievous, yet she didn't look happy in one bit.  
"... fine. I'll go."  
Audrey sneered at Halsey, who was only an inch taller.  
"Josh, if you leave, you won't get those blotters anymore. You sure you just wanna quit so sud-"  
"Stop it. Those drugs are what's killing him. Don't encourage him to-"  
"What is he, your boyfriend?" Halsey stepped up.  
"Hell no. But he's a kid. He's not even eighteen yet, and he's stupid. You seriously want him to drag you all down with those stupid ass drugs?"  
"You don't know how this place operates. He-"  
"I'm not letting you take him. Once this whole time goes by, I'll leave. Hell, when I left, he was introduced to fucking drugs. Now he's addicted. He just to be an innocent, little brat. Now he's a fucking... I don't know."  
Josh looked at his chest warily.  
"LSD isn't that bad. I jus-"  
"Yeah, you just want to see Tyler, I get that, but.. he's dead. You just gotta accept that."

".... I.... I can't.. though.. I need these now.. I-I can't do anything without him..."  
"You're just addicted. Tyler has nothing to do with it anymore. It's the drug." Audrey explained.  
".... b-...but I saw him yesterday.."

"And what'd he say?"

Josh's eyes widened in panic.

  
"He's no one's property."  
".. so, Josh? You're gonna leave?"

Josh didn't speak.

"After we helped you stay alive?"

"I-I'm glad for that. Thank you. B-but... I gotta do what I intended to do in the first place.. Tyler and I were gonna go after Audrey anyway..." Josh's fragile voice was mumbling was quiet.  
Halsey's expression softened.  
"Then, you have all your stuff with you, right..?"  
"Y-yeah.."  
"Good.. go ahead, I guess."  
Josh's eyelashes fluttered.  
"R-really...? T-thank you...!"

 

 

 

 

"I-I'm cold... c-can't really move that much..-" Josh shivered.  
"Sorry. Can't do anything about that."  
Josh looked down bitterly.  
"C-can we take a break...?"  
"Josh, it's not even snowing."  
"... yeah... that's why I haven't passed out yet." Josh scoffed.  
"Do you usually complain like this to Tyler..?!" Audrey turned around.  
Josh blushed.  
"....yeah."  
"Oh yeah? Then what does he do?"

"... he picks me up and hugs me whenever I'm cold.." Josh was smiling like an idiot now.  
Audrey laughed.  
"A-and.. he gives me his food if I'm really hungry.. a-and.. I love him a lot..." Josh giggled.  
"...."  
His smile disappeared.

The wind gently blew.

  
Josh didn't talk again.  
His heart ached.  
He was lonely in his mind.  
They had no road to stick to.  
Just the forest, with only fences to block them from coming into Maryland.

 

"... we're safe like this, righ-"  
A bullet hit a tree beside them.  
".... shit, shit shit shit..! We gotta go through quickly-"

"Stop right there..!"

"Come on, Josh!"

The boy quickly attempted to jump over the fence, soon realizing their foot was stuck.  
"My god, not this shit again...!" Audrey yelled.  
Josh, getting mad at himself, pulled his leg out, falling on his face into the fence.  
"H-hurry-...-"

The soldier grabbed Josh's backpack, and-

 

  
His skull exploded.

 

 

  
"There's a kid. And a woman. They have guns."  
A man from far away could be heard talking into a handheld transceiver.

The man walked closer. He was holding an assault rifle.

 

_"Don't fight us, or we'll take you down and feed you to the infected."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not updating that much, idk if it feels like I don't update, but it feels like I don't update to me. My writing is going into that stand where it gets bad, and I can't really find motivation to write until I get an idea, which is tough because I usually think of ideas at school.
> 
> When I should be listening to the teacher (lmao)


	30. Mask

Surely, the man didn't look very formal.  
He had a bandana around his mouth and nose and the bottom half of his face.  
There was some old military gear, though it was dusty, and wasn't the same color as the government's military gear.

  
"P-please let us go.. we just want to cross the borde-"  
The man jerked the end of the gun into Josh's bruised face, making him all over.  
Blood began to drip down his nose.  
He was breathing heavily.  
The man grabbed the poor boy's hair, getting a good look at his face.  
"P-please..." he whispered, the pain in his eyes clearly shown.  
"C-come on, we weren't asking to deal with you or anything." Audrey stepped up.  
"Hurry up, and follow me, or I'll blow his head open." The man aimed the gun at Josh's head, putting him into a chokehold.  
Audrey groaned.  
"... tsk."

She follow the man as Josh squirmed in his arms.

 

  
Where they ended up looked like a concentration camp.  
But Josh stumbled and fell to his knees due to the lack of air.  
His vision was slightly blurry.  
He felt a gun being thrusted into his back.  
He yelped.  
He choked, and gurgled.  
Trying to get his senses back to normal, he took deep breaths.  
He looked around.  
People's stared down at him.  
He was shaking in fear.

Things sounded distorted before he passed out on the ground, with a black eye and a bloody nose.

 

 

When Josh woke up, he was curled in a ball.  
Audrey was sitting with her arms on her knees, looking at the window.  
They were locked in some sort of cellar.  
Josh's stomach growled.  
".... g-god.. I'm hungry... sorry.." he mumbled.  
"...did they take our stuff..?"

"Yeah. They only put back this shit."  
Audrey held up the bag of blotters.  
"... c-can I... have them back for a sec..."  
Audrey tossed them at Josh's face, making him feel useless and hated.

The boy stuck only one on his tongue, looking away from the girl.  
Holding his mouth shut, he knew he'd end up saying the weirdest shit later on.  
Probably wouldn't work, but still, he had to try.  
He'd get into trouble if Audrey saw him doing it.  
Josh began to tremble.  
His body felt ticklish, as if spiders were crawling on him.

No.. not spiders...

  
Rats.

Josh scraped his nails against the wall.  
Audrey averted her gaze, watching Josh look at the ground, with a horrified expression on his face.  
"R-rats... there's rats...-"

"..what the hell?" Audrey looked at him.

"I-I'm scared... T-Tyler... please..." Josh began to cry, his voice was shaky and quiet.

Audrey didn't quite get it yet.

He was tripping, wasn't he..?

 

  
Josh was now crying.

_"W-why can't I find him...?!"_

"... he's dead... that's why..." Audrey knew Josh wasn't a violent person, but what if she made him pissed..? Would Josh go insane..?

"B-but.. I need him...! I need him.. I love him...!" Josh covered his face with his shaky hands, his knees scrunched up to his chest.

"...." Audrey gave up.  
She got up, and grabbed the bag right out of Josh's hands.

Josh choked out.  
"N-No...! I need that, please...!"  
"God, Tyler would hate you right now!!" Audrey yelled.

Josh's hand was still outstretched in the air.  
Tears ran down his face so quickly.

The door opened.  
The same guy from before came in wit another person.  
The man was wearing a ski mask.  
His arms were scarred, and he was also, along with the other man, holding an assault rifle.  
"You'll be let out by tonight, but we needed to have your things checked."  
"What the hell?! You brought us down here for no good reason. We didn't ask to come he-"  
"You'll like being here. I'm sure of it."  
"Hell no..!" Audrey yelled.

The man wearing the ski mask looked over to Josh, who was going through tremors and was crying frantically.  
"T-...Tyler.... Tyler......" Josh whimpered.

"... he's on LSD. Don't mind him.-"

Josh peeked from his fingers. Looking directly back at the man.  
Crawling over, he grasped onto the man's legs.  
"Josh- let go."

"P-Please... h-hug...."

  
Josh was going insane.  
Why was he saying this all of a sudden...?  
Was it the man's eyelashes..?  
His lips..?

He could see Tyler in them, and he had no idea why.  
The colors were insane.  
Josh was going insane.

"...p....please....."

Josh suddenly jumped onto him in a strange way, holding him down with his legs, sitting on the man's stomach.  
"T-Tyle-"  
Grabbed the mask, he pulled it off.

 

  
There was a deep cut on the left side of his lips, right at the end, and his right eye had a scar over it as well.

 _"Get... **off."**_ Tyler growled in Josh's face.

The poor boy felt like he was going to have a heart attack.  
"T-Tyler..?!" Audrey got up.

The livid man pushed Josh off his body roughly.  
Josh couldn't say anything.  
He had the most traumatizing expression on his face.  
Tyler hastily got up, and grabbed the ski mask, roughly putting it on his face again.

  
_"Don't you ever touch me again."_

 

 

Josh felt like his heart was being tossed around the room, and then cut up into small pieces.

  
When the two left the room,  
Josh just sat there.

He laughed nervously.

"... I'm just tripping... right...?"

  
"..." Audrey couldn't say anything.

"... r-....right...? That wasn't really him.. right...?" His voice cracked.

 

".... please tell me... t-that... it wasn't.... him...." Josh had tears in his eyes.

They fell quickly.

Audrey has never seen so much fall to the ground before.  
Josh is broken.  
His heart is shattered.  
He's unable to make a single sound.

All she sees are his lips quivering, his eyes wet and shiny, his hands shaking, his chest pulsating...

Suddenly the drug had worn off so much.

He turned around, away from Audrey.

Hiding his face, he began to sob.

And it wasn't just loud.  
He sobbed his mind out.  
Everything felt crushed.  
He was crushed.  
He was dying. God, he was practically dying.  
He wanted to die, at least.  
He already began to hate living a long time ago.

Tyler really... did... hate him...

Those trips..  
Tyler hated his guts all along.  
Tyler won't ever love him again.  
No one will ever love the poor boy again.  
He's alone. He'll always be alone.  
Josh doesn't feel whole anymore, he feels like some sort of broken wing.  
He feels like a crushed leaf on the side of the road.  
He feels like a little kid again.

 

He took off his coats hastily, and began to hug them all in one big clump as he cried, and cried, and cried.


	31. Chapped and ripped.

Josh woke up sickly, his eyes red and puffy, and his face pale.  
He was in a new place.

The bed was quite soft, but the whole entire room was extremely dark.

He was wearing his coats again, but in his arms laid a pillow.  
His eyes stung.  
He placed his cold hands upon his closed eyelids, hoping to feel some comfort.  
Josh felt sick.  
Real sick.  
His body was weak and numb.  
His little sandwich bag of drugs were missing, he would have guessed that they took it.  
His head hurt like hell.  
Where was he..?

 

He stumbled out of the bed, hugging the pillow tightly.  
There was talking outside.  
It was fuzzy, and the boy could barely hear anything.  
Walking over to the only light he could see, he made his way to the door, opening it meekly.

Audrey was standing there, consulting with someone, her arms were crossed.

One of the men who caught them.

Audrey turned her head, seeing Josh's miserable face, and his messed up hair.  
"... oh.. shit.. Josh, you look like a mess.." Audrey gasped out.  
Josh blinked dreadfully.

"... I can tell.." he mumbled, his voice lisping.

He looked down.  
".... I'm kinda... hungry.." he mumbled again.  
Audrey didn't say anything.  
"Our stuffs in the other room over there." She pointed to the door at the end of the hallway.  
Josh sulked as he slowly made his way to the little room.

Seeing his backpack untouched, he shuffled through the items inside.  
Taking out a water bottle and a can of peaches, his gaze rested upon that little sandwich bag.

He opened the can, looking away.

But he couldn't help but glance every now and then.

  
As he tossed away the soon empty can, he turned back to the little bag filled with those tiny bits of papers.  
He examined the little pictures on them.  
But that didn't distract him.  
He grabbed the bag, and pushed open the door hastily.  
Audrey and the other person were gone.

He walked to the front door, and pushing that one open as well, he was pulled into a strong gust of wind.  
He covered his face, which was stinging with snow.

Pushing through the strong winds, Josh made his way into the main building.

The whole place was made like a town.

It was dark and blue.

 

  
His fingers were fumbling was he pulled the handle back to the frame.

  
"... you should go back to where you came from."  
Josh's head peeked up.  
He looked at the group of men, sitting together, holding cans of beer and smoking in each other's faces.  
Some of them covered their face with bandanas and ski masks.  
Josh could instantly spot Tyler out of the group.

Oh god.

 

It was real.  
Tyler was real.

  
Tyler was alive, and it wasn't just a bad trip.

  
Tyler was alive.

  
Josh took a step before being stopped by one of them men, who stood up, blocking Josh.

"You heard him. Leave."

"...." Josh's mouth was slightly open, as if he wanted to say something.  
".... T-..Tyler...-"  
"Just fucking go." Tyler's voice was gruff.  
Josh swallowed the lump in his throat.

Josh couldn't speak.

"... I told you to go." Tyler said again.

  
Josh pushed his way through the man blocking him, and grabbed Tyler, pulling him into a hug.  
Though he began to push the small boy away.

"Josh.. let go."

"...no..."

"Let go. I told you to let go."

The boy grabbed the mask, pulling it off his head again.

Tyler threw his fist at Josh's skull, tossing him to the wall. There was a loud thud, traveling to the other buildings.  
The other men began to get alerted.

"Tyler-"

 

The man got up, walking towards the small boy, who was convulsing.

Josh looked up at Tyler's scarred face, seeing how angry he was.  
His head couldn't even stay still.  
The pain hurt like hell.  
He never expected Tyler to be so strong.  
The poor boy tried to breathe properly.

Tyler glared down at him, his eyes killing him slowly.

 

 

 

 

"O-...one more... c-cut..." Josh's brittle bare legs were trembling.  
He dropped to the cold floor again, blood staring to slowly make its way down his wrists.  
His knees hurt from impact.

  
He looked at himself in the mirror.  
His shaky shallow breathing was echoing against the glass.  
His right eye was bruised and just above his eye laid a large, purple bruise from when Tyler punched him.  
He had cuts on his waist and hips from hitting the wall.

  
Slowly opening the little plastic bag, he took as many blotters as he could hold.

 

 

 

 

"Where the fuck is Tyler?!"

It was dark, and Audrey was running through the halls, pushing through the people in her way.  
"I need help, and god, I need help fast."  
Tyler looked up.  
Audrey stomped over, and Tyler didn't move.  
"J-Josh is fucking tripping, you gotta do something about tha-"

"I don't want to. Tell him that he could never talk to me again."

".... look, jackass. I suggest you get off your damn high horse, and actually talk to him. He's takes drugs. Drugs. He hasn't seen you in forever, he misses you a ton, and... he's bleeding... like a lot.. and.. I don't know how. It's scaring me. It's scaring me, and I need you to fix it."

"Why the hell does he need to take drugs? He doesn't need to get high-"

"... why don't you love him...? I..I thought you loved him."  
"Don't turn that way. He's fucked up before, and it's not my problem-"

"Have you seen how much he cries..?!"

Tyler sighed, his dreary eyes glancing to the side, looking rather guilty.

"Get up."

 

 

 

"Josh?"  
"... Josh.....?"

"....."  
"H-hey.. can you see me...?"

  
Tyler waved his hand in front of the wrecked boy.

_"... angel...?"_

Tyler looked down at the boy's wrists.

".. oh my god..-" picking his arms up gently, he examined the immense amount of cuts.

"... I... I didn't think you loved me anymore. I thought that you'd leave forever.. I thought that you'd forget about me, and find someone else.."

"I thought that if you ever saw my face, you'd never want to kiss me again. And my hands.. I-I thought that you'd hate me even more."

  
Tyler was missing his ring finger on his right hand.

 

"Josh... can you hear me right now..? Baby boy...?"

Wrapping his arms around the poor kid, he could feel his stomach rapidly shudder, and he could hear his breathing low, but shaky.

Eyeing the backpack a few feet away, Tyler reached over, and managed to pull out a roll of gauze bandages.

  
He gently wrapped them around the boy's bleeding arms.

"... I'm sorry for hurting you. And I'm sorry for lying. I wasn't bit. I just thought that.. I just thought that you hated me. I know you're sorry too. I promise.."

Tyler took off the mask.  
He gently pressed his lips against Josh's forehead.  
Tyler missed doing that, honesty.

 

 

He knew Josh couldn't feel it, but he hoped that he did, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's starting, the point where my writing goes bad :(  
> Things are happening randomly and I try to find reason   
> I hope you guys are all still here and still comment and read


	32. Boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The thing in the beginning is just a dumb filler rip

_"Joshua, sit still, okay? Be a good boy, and stay in that chair."_

_The little boy swung his stubby little feet, unable to reach the floor._   
_The girl was running around the shop, doing all kinds of things a little at a time._   
_She was quite overwhelmed._

_".... I'm bored.." he said, his adorable voice echoed through the shop._   
_The girl stopped._   
_"Joshua...-" she pulled out her hair tie._   
_".... there's no one to play with..." the little boy was mumbling, afraid to get the girl mad._

_"Have a cookie, okay?" The girl sighed, crouching down to his height._   
_"I already had a bunch.." Josh blinked innocently._   
_"Look, I'm sorry. I can't babysit you and work at the same time."_   
_"Then what are you doing?"_   
_The girl's eye twitched._   
_"Please don't turn into a brat..." she prayed to herself._

_The yellow sun crashed against the blue shadows inside the little bakery._   
_"Why isn't there no one here...?" Josh started to swing his feet again, nibbling on his cookie._   
_"People will come back, and expect orders from me, so please be quiet and-"_   
_"But I hate sitting here... I wanna go home..!" Josh whined._   
_"Stop... it..." she groaned._

  
_"Can you at least talk to me..?" Josh didn't like to pout, he knew it looked stupid, but instead, he fluttered his eyelashes and looked up, pleadingly._   
_"... what do you wanna talk about, huh? Boys? Coffee..? How am I supposed to start a conversation with an eight year old..?!"_   
_"We could talk about boys."_

_"...what?"_

_"I'm fine with that."_

_"... w-why don't you like talking about girls..? If you want, we could switch to that topic instead.. then again... you may be too young for that kind of thing anywa-"_

_"I don't mind, as long as I can pass time.." Josh looked down, mumbling embarrassingly._   
_".. then.. uh.. I don't know how to start this." The girl began to take out a few macarons, and then she started to leave them in pretty decorated boxes._   
_"... I guess... guys can be jerks sometimes...? I dunno." She pulled out a pretty pink ribbon._   
_".. am I a jerk..?"_   
_"No, no. You're kinda bratty though."_   
_Josh frowned._   
_"I mean, I'd like to know your opinion on girls. Tell me." The girl smirked, and rested her head on her palm._   
_"... girls are.. different, I guess. But sometimes... I worry that I'm a bit too girly."_

_"It's okay to be girly sometimes." She tied up the box, and left it on the counter._

_"Y-yeah.. but... I'm scared of so many things.. and I talk like a girl, even.. I don't sound like all the other boys.."_

_"Aw, that's fine."_

  
_"... I know that boys end up having girlfriends and all that.. but.. I don't want a girlfriend.. I'm too girly to have a girlfriend..."_

  
_"... I'd rather be the girl." Josh began to giggle._

_"Then that means you'll need a boyfriend." The girl smiled back._

_"... yeah..."_   
_"....that makes me feel kinda safe." Josh smiled like an idiot._

 

 

 

 

 

 

A slight difference in black made it's way into Josh's vision.  
His body felt sore, and his head felt as if it was splitting apart.  
He began to notice where he was.  
In bed.  
Again.  
Covered in blankets,  
Covered in bandages,  
And.. mostly.. alone.  
Josh could barely move.

  
His bruised eye was covered along with his forehead with a bandage as well. His vision was mostly blurry and dark.  
Josh didn't know how to feel.

He tried to crawl out of bed, but instead of just stumbling, he fell onto the floor, right on his back.  
Letting out a small cry, his fingernails scratched against the the wooden boards.  
Slowly crawling on his hands and knees, he opened the door, his eye drowsy looking.  
  
Tyler was sitting outside on a rusted folding chair, beside the door.  
He was wearing the mask as usual.  
They locked eyes for a second.  
Josh's mood suddenly dropped.  
"Josh.. you're awake." Tyler whispered.  
He was usually a soft spoken person, anyway.  
"...." the boy was afraid to say anything.  
But Tyler reached under his arms, picking him up, and letting him sit on his lap, facing him.  
Josh squirmed a bit, taken by surprise.  
Tyler's hand gently rested on Josh's waist, and hips.

".... I.... sorry for.. hitting you a few days ago. You had so much of those drugs... you didn't overdose, thankfully, but your body.. you were paralyzed, almost. It really scared me.." Tyler comfortingly whispered into the boy's ear.  
His legs were bare, and his shirt drooped down a bit, exposing his pale, bony chest.

"... I'm sorry for making you cry. I really did think you hated me. And it didn't help that... now my face.. looks.. like this. I don't usually like having people look at me. I look like a freak. B-but... I really do still love you."  
Josh's chest felt warm suddenly.  
The boy could barely speak, but he pulled the mask off of Tyler's head weakly.  
He began to cry.  
Touching the man's face, he wept.  
His cheeks were the same, his forehead, his eyes, even... even with that little scar on his eye and lips.. he looked the same to Josh. He was still the best person in the world to him.  
He hadn't seen Tyler's face in such a long time.  
A few months, to be exact.  
The man brought him closer, and Josh cried as he hugged Tyler's chest snugly.

Tyler carried him back to bed, leaving the mask on the chair.  
As he laid the boy down, he looked at his body carefully.  
His stomach was slightly showing, along with his collarbone.

Tyler touched the boy's shoulders, and let his hands run down his chest.  
".... you're so pretty, Josh." He murmured.  
He sadly chuckled a bit. "I definitely don't fit in with you."  
The boy visibly blushed.  
The door was still open, letting in the light.  
"... still... I kinda wanna...-"  
Tyler lowered his head to Josh's face.  
The boy grabbed the man's cheeks, and they kissed, over and over again.

 

 

"... I'll close the door. _I don't want anybody seeing what we're gonna do."_ Tyler murmured in the boy's ear again, making him shiver.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But hey I hope this gets me more reads hahahHAHA SMUT


	33. Then what?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the smut scene is here for y'all okay

Tyler shut the door behind him.  
Josh's vision was still slightly blurry and dark, though Tyler could see the nervousness in his body.  
That made it all the better for him.  
Josh was breathing heavily, though his voice was still cute and embarrassed, as usual. He could hear it.  
Tyler slowly took off the loose shirt on Josh's chest.  
The boy was still blushing immensely, covering up his bandaged body.  
Tyler smiled.  
"No need to hide anything, angel, you're beautiful.."

The man then began to pull down the boy's shorts.  
Josh whimpered, crossing his legs.  
Soon he gave in, and Tyler slid them off.  
He lifted his thighs, as if trying to hide himself.  
Tyler held them down gently, however.  
"It's okay. It's okay."

Josh was now stark naked, right in front of Tyler.  
Turning away, he hid his face.  
Tyler took off his own shirt, and began to climb into the bed with Josh.  
The boy's face was completely red.  
"... Ty...Ty...." he whimpered, not really meaning anything in general.  
He was just embarrassed.

Tyler picked the boy up, and sat him on his lap, spreading apart his legs on him.  
Josh's eyes stared at him nervously.  
God, he was so cute.  
Tyler couldn't help but grab at the boy's bottom. Each hand on each side.  
Squishing him, Tyler got close to Josh's ear again.

 _"All of this is mine. Everything."_ He said.  
Josh nodded embarrassingly.  
His fragile body was pale and skinny, and his frame was so small. Josh suddenly became ten times more submissive.  
Tyler's hands were still on his ass.  
He buried his face into the man's neck, as he felt him spread open his little hole, rubbing his fingers against the opening.  
Josh's whimpers were muffled.

Slipping in one finger, the boy could feel it go deeper and deeper inside. He shuddered.  
Adding another, Tyler slammed his fingers into Josh hard. Josh could hear a slapping sound, even.  
He cried out, moaning and writhing as he felt Tyler hit his prostate.  
His breathing was shaky.  
Grasping onto the man's clothes, Josh felt Tyler continuously thrust into him, hard, and fast.  
The boy covered his face as he felt the electrifying sensation run through his body to his finger tips.  
His body was throbbing.  
He felt like he was going to explode.

 

Tyler pulled his fingers out, and Josh was breathing heavily on his shoulder.  
Tyler took off his own pants as well.  
The boy's face was extremely red.  
Seeing how Tyler sized up to just above  his navel, Josh looked at the man, his doe eyes blinking beautifully.  
Tyler gently lifted to boy onto him, making Josh realize.  
Right before, Josh looked at the man worriedly. He was quite nervous.

"Shh, it's okay, baby boy.."  
Josh gave in, and let himself sink down onto Tyler, a stinging pain appearing at his brim.  
Josh let out a little shaky moan, tears began to well up in his eyes.

"T-too.. _big_..."  
"It'll fit, baby, you've just never had something like this inside you."  
"H-..hurts..."

Josh squirmed a bit, trying to get used to having Tyler inside of him.

"You okay now?"  
Josh nodded slowly, gulping.  
"I'll start to move now, okay?"  
He nodded again, this time, quicker, and more rapid.

The boy didn't expect it to feel so powerful.  
With each thrust, Tyler has basically pounding into him with no mercy.  
Josh was making the loudest noises, and the most embarrassing ones too.  
Trembling, he could feel Tyler inside of him.  
It was a weird thought.  
Josh was lowered onto the bed on his back, and Tyler lifted his thighs to expose his ass better.  
Josh was crying, his head leaned back against the pillow.  
It felt.. surprisingly.. good.

He felt small and submissive underneath the older man, easily dominated and easily used.  
Josh felt like he could depend on Tyler, no matter what.  
Tyler was reaching his edges, and he was constantly hitting his sweet spot.  
Josh secretly loved the feeling.  
The pain was pleasurable, and he was drowning in euphoria.  
Tyler suddenly reached down, and grasped onto the boy's cock.  
Josh screamed.  
"Not yet, baby boy.." Tyler grunted as he continued to pound into the fragile, and sensitive boy.  
Josh was blubbering.  
Tyler went deeper and deeper, making Josh cry even more.  
Finally, Josh felt a frothy liquid fill up his insides to the brim.  
Tyler grit his teeth, and groaned.  
Josh was exhausted.  
Tyler let go of Josh, and the small boy climaxed quickly, letting out a loud cry.  
Panting, Josh opened his eyes again, to see Tyler's face.

  
Josh grabbed the sides of Tyler's face, pulling him in for a sweet little kiss.

Josh could barely talk.  
He was still tripping a wee bit from the drugs, and along with being fucked into oblivion, he was weak and sensitive.  
Tyler kissed Josh's cheek lovingly.  
He could see the boy scrunch up his face behind the bandages in happiness.

Tyler cleaned the boy up, and put his clothes back on.  
Josh fell asleep quickly, laying on the bed under the covers.

When Tyler left the room, Audrey was standing there.  
She looked slightly disgusted.  
".... was he loud..?" Tyler suddenly asked.

 

 

  
"Josh and I are planning to go to Military Medical Center. We're gonna try figure out this shit. You wanna come along?"  
"... ahh-... I.. I'm not sure.." Tyler looked away.  
"..changed your mind?" Audrey turned to him.  
"I just.. ever since I nearly died.. I've been doing so well here, you know.. Josh just recently came back, and of course I love him.. but.. I'm not sure if I should go anymore. You guys can do it alone, right?"  
"... you.. want to let Josh leave?" Audrey sat up.  
"..... it's not that I don't love him. He can stay here if he wanted to. I just.. I'm fine just staying here."  
"But.. what if Josh gets hurt? He'll need you then, wouldn't he..? But you'd be all the way here."

  
"If you can't take care of him.. he shouldn't really be coming with you at all, don't you think?"

  
Audrey was speechless.  
"Maybe it's better off if he just stays here. And even son, if you figure out the secret, what will you do..? You can't just make a cure. We're all just normal people. Unless you find someone to help you out, you truly can't do anything."

 

  
"... we'll find someone. There'll be someone, I'm sure of it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may end this fic in a few more chapters :(  
> I'm not cut out for action/violent plots, cause it's too much happening at once.  
> Hah, it's not like I'm good at romance either.  
> After this fic, I may start a new one that's less extreme. :')  
> I feel like people are starting to leave.  
> Hope you're not though, I wanna thank the people who are still reading, and if you're not commenting, I'm glad that you're still here anyways, whether you comment or not :)  
> I love you all very much!


	34. Strike one.

"Really?"

Audrey's eyes widened suddenly.

".. what are you trying to say..?" She asked.  
"Maybe it's better off if Josh stays here." Tyler said, his soft spoken voice sounding calm and silent as usual.  
Audrey didn't say anything. She just looked at the man, with a rather unhappy expression.  
"... no. No, I... Tyler, nothing's gonna change if we don't do something."  
"That's not always gonna be our job. To save the world."  
"Then who's gonna do it? Tell me."  
"Someone along the line. Just not us. We're not gonna change anything, whether we like it or not."  
"You got those scars, because you wanted to get to the capital..!" Audrey hissed.  
"Well, now I regret it.." Tyler said, crossly.  
Audrey didn't say anything.

"At least.. at least consider it. If Josh can't go, then what will I do?"  
"Stick right here. You'll be safer here than on the road. This place is shaped like a town, almost. It's civilized. There's kids, men and women.."  
"Things won't be the same as normal." Audrey said.  
"We just have to get used to it. I'm sorry, Audrey." Tyler said, his emotions no longer changing.  
"... don't you have a doctor somewhere here? Maybe they can hel-"  
"Our doctors aren't that advanced. They'll only heal wounded people, and kill the infected. There has to be a legitimate scientist." Tyler said.  
Audrey exhaled, staring at Tyler with an annoyed expression on her face.  
"... why are you so intent on this idea, Audrey?" Tyler asked.

"... what else will I do? I'm a bitch for nothing if I don't do anything."

 

"... well... I guess Josh is awake now. He's been half dead for a whole day." Audrey leaned against her hand, staring at the wall, her eyes looking for a break.  
"Yeah.. I guess he has. But he's okay now. He might be really hungry when he wakes up again. Right now he's just.. real tired."

"He's a virgin, I'm guessing. Or.. not anymore. It's not like I've ever been with someone either, but that's never been my premise. ...god, I never expected you guys to fall in love. It's kinda hilarious. You were just some guy I met on the street, who helped me save the poor kid, and now you're having sex with him." Audrey laughed nervously.  
"Don't say it like that. We've both been through a lot of trauma together." Tyler grinned a little.  
"... well, what happened between you two? How'd you separate..?" Audrey sat up.

  
"Josh and I were.. starting to drift apart. And I kinda felt depressed at the moment. We were on a train, and Josh and I started to fight. He held a gun to my head, but he instantly dropped it. Of course, he instantly regretted it. I left, still. We were pissed at each other, and Josh sat there, alone, as I went to check on the conductor, who happened to help me get the whole train running."

"Turns out, there was a room infested with those fuckers.  
The guy got bit, and he tried to kill them. It was too late for him, and I started to make my way back to Josh. I told him to leave, and I told him that I loved him.. and he had to get off. I lied about getting bit. I just.. I just felt he didn't care anymore. So I decided.. that instead of causing more emotional pain.. especially for me, that I'd just end the relationship all together. And being the cold idiot I was, I thought that this way.. me and Josh would never meet again."

"I should have remembered that.. Josh can't really take care of himself alone.. I kinda feel bad, cause now he takes drugs.."

"This group managed to save me from that wrecked train, and they tried to treat my wounds. Though.. I have scars now. I wore a mask so people wouldn't have to look at them. I was kinda afraid that Josh would dislike how I looked now."

  
"... I remembered that Josh told me the reason he took LSD was because.. he'd sometimes we you in his little visions. I'm sure he really did miss you. He loved you a ton from what I heard."

  
"... hah.. really?"

"When you left the cell after you yelled at him.. Josh was a huge mess... he literally passed out from crying so much. He couldn't even hold himself together."

"It was probably worse when I punched him, too.. he cut himself.. poor kid.."

  
"Now, I guess you have your proof. Josh loves you more than anything in the world." Audrey smirked.

Tyler chuckled, hiding his blushy face.

"... now that I kinda know about you two.. maybe it's not right for me separate you guys. Especially not for my sake."  
"I wish.. I just wish we could at least change something. Hell, I wouldn't even feel safe having someone else on the road to make a cure. It always seemed as if it was for me to start, and for me to finish.." Audrey grumbled, sadly.

  
".. we could.. we could ask Josh later on, when he wakes up. If he wants to go with you.. he can g-"  
"The only choice I feel like having now is.. you coming with us." Audrey interrupted him.  
Tyler sighed, looking to the side doubtfully.  
The sun was beginning to rise, and the lights above them flickered.  
"Like.. I can't separate you two again. Josh would be crying every single day.. and.. you're pretty goddamn lonely here, from what I've seen. You don't even fit in with any groups, in all honestly. If you can't have Josh.. then.."

"... and... what if I accidentally get him killed..? That'd be the worst possible outcome. You'd be pissed at me, wouldn't you..?" Audrey looked at him, sadly.  
"... I'd be pissed at myself more. I'd probably be more depressed. I wouldn't hate you for it though.. but.. please don't get him killed." Tyler looked like the type of person to have many other loved ones gone from his life beforehand.  
If he lost Josh, he'd probably kill himself.

"I know.. I'll try not to. If Josh wants to stay, then I guess I'll have no choice but to stay myself. Even if I don't want to.. but I'll do it..."

  
Audrey was lying to herself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A woman was sitting on the icy bench, smoking a cigarette.  
"... hey, I know you. You're that lady who was pulled into this place, huh? With the boy?" She smiled, but it wasn't so warm.  
"Uh.. yeah, I guess you could say that." Audrey sat down beside her.  
"I'm Debby."  
"Audrey."

"... so.. Debby.. could you tell me a bit more about this place..? I'm just curious, that's all. Tyler doesn't seem to care. Hah, he mostly cares about Josh." Audrey joked, trying to make the conversation less awkward.  
"I can tell. You know, this place has its ups and downs. The guys here are fairly strict, but we have food and shelter, at least."  
"What kind... of.. strict?"  
"They have rules here. If you break them, you get a strike, in a way. They keep their eye on you, and if you keep breaking their rules, they decide that they're too good for you, and feed you to the infected. Like Greek civilizations or something. You get exiled with nothing."

".... what if a kid like Josh was to break a rule..?" Audrey was suddenly interested.  
".. it doesn't really make a difference. He'd be dead meat." Debby inhaled through the cigarette.  
"And.. what about Tyler? Or.. any of the other security members?" Audrey asked again.  
"......."  
Debby let out a puff of smoke.

"I dunno about that, Audrey.. depends on their past behaviors. Though... they're gonna be coming over, soon. We should leave. Don't want to get in their way, now, do we..? Plus, we should really be talking about this subject."  
Audrey watched as the woman got up.

"You should get to your domain, now."

"They'll be waking up."

  
"Yeah, yeah, I understand. Thanks Debby."

The woman smiled as she walked away.

Audrey didn't go back to the building she came from, however. She decided to hide, as she heard footsteps from the other side of the street.  
A man was being dragged to the town center.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may take a break from this fic, and work on another Joshler fic, no zombies, no blood and gore, just joshler and stuff.  
> It's kinda tough to make this as exciting as it should be.  
> If you don't see me updating in anytime soon, please don't leave, I'll update again eventually.  
> The other joshler fic may be a bit more personal, and more focused on the relationship than the plot.  
> Though, I may just be overthinking stuff, and I'll continue to keep updating this fic.  
> But I am planning on another one, so keep an eye out.
> 
> If there's anything you ever want to talk about, such as the fanfiction, or if you just wanna talk with me in general and don't feel like using ao3, he ahead and dm me on my insta (@martiansheepy), I'd love to talk with you guys :')


	35. Do it for me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay I'm back no one missed me

"Josh, were going out, no-"

Tyler turned his head, seeing Audrey burst into the room.  
Josh weakly let his gaze brush over her.  
"... where'd you get that idea?" Tyler asked.  
"Don't you see what's happening outside?!"  
"Of course I do."  
Josh blinked and glanced, too tired to talk.  
"What'll you do about this then? We can't stay here." Audrey hissed.  
"We'll get used to it."  
"What about Josh..?! What if he doe-"  
"I can take care of him. This is none of your business."  
"He will get throw to the floor like that guy outside, and they'll hurt him. Hell, they might even rape him, and he's gotten close to it before. You don't kno-"  
"I know. I know what they do. Shut up about it, we can figure it ou-"  
"I am.. a grown woman. I'm not a teenager. I think the fuck not." Audrey growled.  
"You're only two years older, Joseph, you're not in goddamn charge-"  
"I am here. I can force you to leave if I wanted to-"  
"..Ty...." Josh whispered, reaching for the man's calloused hand.

Tyler suddenly stopped, gently tangling his fingers with Josh's soft ones.

  
"He'll die, you know."  
"He'll die out there, too. Look at the condition he's in!" Tyler stepped forwards.  
"But I can't just go alone, I need someone to help me out!!"  
"What about before? You threw him off so easily, why're you changing your mind so suddenly..?" Tyler narrowed his eyes, glaring at Audrey. Josh purses his lips.  
"He didn't know how to use a goddamn gun at that point. You think I'd bring him along..?!" Audrey yelled.  
"What about Josh..? What does he think?!"  
Audrey stared daggers into the poor boy's soul.  
Josh suddenly felt his chest clench.

Tyler turned around slowly.

  
"He obviously doesn't need to go with y-"

"Does he want to?" Audrey snapped.

Tyler twitched.

Josh was under pressure.

"..."

"Well...?" Tyler asked, his soft voice gentle and caring.  
The poor boy couldn't think anymore.

"... I don't wanna leave Ty alone.." he mumbled weakly.

Audrey walked to the window, and pulled back the curtains.

 

Tyler's eyes widened.

The soldier outside let his axe crash against the man's crushed arm.

Josh let out a horrified gasp, whimpered.  
Tyler quickly covered the boy's eyes.  
"... god, you fucking.." Tyler muttered.  
"You still wanna stay here with Tyler, Josh? Tell me. We'll always come back. And when you do, he'll, you'll have a chance of living normally with your boyfriend. You don't want to become that, do you..?"

"Hell, Tyler could be one of them."

The man was glaring at her by now.

"He's killed people before, just like that."

Josh's lips quivered.

"You could be that person, right there, and Tyler could be the one cutting you apart."

"... shut.. the fuck up."

"Close the damn shades, and leave."

Audrey didn't batt an eye.  
"... please...." Tyler croaked out, his voice cracking.

The girl huffed, and tossed the shades back together, shutting the door behind her angrily.  
Josh was weeping.  
"B-Baby boy.. it's okay.. I won't do something like that to you.. I love you more than anything in the world. Without you, I'd be fucking ruined.." Tyler held the sides of his crying face, wiping the tears from his cheeks gently.

"... b-but.. I don't know who to go with..." Josh broke out sobbing.  
".... I understand, angel. If you wanna go with her, I'll let you go.." he mumbled, as if he didn't want to.  
".... but I don't wanna leave you alone here..." Josh sniffled.  
Tyler smiled gently, then leaned his forehead against Josh's shaking chest.  
Hugging him gently, Josh weeped as he could feel Tyler's warmth.  
It was sweet.  
Everything was sweet.

  
"....please come along.."

  
".. I.. I don't know, baby."

"Please.. I'm scared.."  
Everything that Josh had been through for the last few months had suddenly disappeared, and he was at that phase again.  
Weak, unable to help himself, and sad.

Tyler was here again, and Tyler didn't guarantee that he'd help.

 

"Tyler... I..I don't want you to stay here.. you're not a soldier.. you're.. you're.."

"I have to.. I don't know what'll be like for me to leave. They might not let me go.. or even you two to go."

"... huh?"

"I don't even know if we could really escape. It's not a kid's play, if we wanted to leave, we'd have to steal supplies, get through the security, and get out of those walls. It's not easy, angel."

"Ah.... I.. then.... what do we do..? Can't we at least try..?"

"You putting a big risk on all of us, angel.. we might all get killed if they find out."

"... t-then.. we're gonna be here forever...?"  
Tyler glanced to the side.  
"I'm bound to do something wrong here.. I'm gonna get killed within the first few days, Ty.. I can't be here forever, I gotta leave real soon..!" Josh had panic in his eyes.  
He was scared, extremely scared.

He was a mere child with only enough intelligence to stay alive and have common sense. He was a brat and could only sometimes shoot guns with luck.  
The fact that he was still alive with Tyler right next to him was a miracle.  
And Tyler was basically it.  
But he couldn't leave Tyler.  
He loved him like crazy.  
And Tyler loved him back just as much.

 

  
"Please at least.. at least escape with us.."

"Escape..? I-I'm not sure if we can do that now, Jo-"

"Well I don't wanna stay here forever, and I don't want you to stay here forever too." Josh looked at the older man in the eye.

  
"Audrey could plan the whole thing out, and you know your way around, right..? So.. maybe, we can figure something out." Josh held Tyler's hands gently, looking down at his fingers and stub sweetly.  
"That's no as easy as it seems.. when we actually try to leave... they'll probably catch us."

  
Josh grinned weakly, his innocent eyes scrunching up in the most beautiful way possible.

 

  
"Kill them."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might update less from now on but I'm at least continuing this
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> No ones here
> 
>  
> 
> I'm sorry :(


	36. Cont.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Managed to push myself to write today, I've been sitting around for too long.  
> I'm sorry.  
> I'm trying so hard right now.  
> Is this still progress? I'm not quite sure.  
> Hell, I'm trying to think of a new Joshler fic, but maybe I should keep my vision on this one before I completely abandon it.  
> I don't want to leave you guys hanging around for nothing.  
> I have an idea of what I'm going for, what I'll take a while for me to execute it.

Audrey is extremely indecisive.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"... um... I know it's a weird time to talk about it now.. but last night..-"  
A blush crept up to Josh's face, as his hands tightened around Tyler's.  
".. u-uhm..."

"... you'd be willing to do that again with me, right?"

"O-of course.. I mean... we're kinda... we're kinda together now.. right..?" Josh's face was red.  
"It didn't hurt, did it..? Probably did."  
".. yeah... it kinda hurt.. b-but.. it's okay."

  
"... don't ever let anybody else do that to you from now on. You're all mine." Tyler grabbed the boy's thigh.

 

 

 

"Can you walk okay?"

"... kinda."

"I'll carry you if I have to. When do you guys plan to leave..?" Tyler gently held the boy still.

"I.. I'm not sure.."

"I'll have to ask Audrey.."

Josh kept glancing over to the closed curtains.

"What's wrong, baby?"

  
".. c-could you.. tell me what happened out there..? Like... could you peek out for a second.. and tell me..?" The boy asked, timidly.  
Tyler nodded, and pulled the curtains back just a tiny bit for only him to see.  
Josh winced and shut his eyes to prevent him from accidentally seeing anything.

  
".... the body's gone. There's just.. a huge stain on the ground now. It's okay."

 

 

"I'm gonna set the whole damn place on fire. If nobody leaves by then, they're gonna die."

"... huh?"

"Everybody in here is fucked up a little inside. They'll manage to leave. I know you're hesitant on killing people, but if they really were able to make it this far, they should probably be able to escape."  
The three were in the same room as before. Josh was meekly sitting on the bed, and Audrey was sitting in a chair. Tyler sat beside the boy, close to the wall.

".. h-hold up... you want to set a community on.. fire..?"

"That community cuts off your limbs." Audrey sneered.  
Josh blinked nervously.  
"Plus... beyond those walls, in the back of the town... they just hope up the infected in there. If it lets loose, we all die."

"...."

"Don't you want to leave now?"

Josh averted his gaze.  
"I already decided... I guess I'm leaving, as long as Tyler comes with us." He mumbled.

"Good. I'm glad." Audrey broke out into a grin.

 

  
"When the fire starts, we all need to leave quickly."

"The doors are locked when that'll happen."

"You're a damn guard, aren't you?" Audrey snapped at Tyler.  
"I'm no fucking novelty member, okay?" Tyler growled.  
"Then what are you?" Audrey added to the flames.  
Josh quickly grabbed Tyler's hand.  
"... u-uhm... p-please.. please don't fight each other." Josh quickly said, worriedly.  
".... there's keys to the opening switch. Keys in the tall building. It's at the very top, the room with the intercom. You won't miss it." Tyler grumbled.  
".. so you're saying we sneak up there?"   
"You need to steal them. Someone has to if we wanna leave. If anyone wants to leave. You can't just escape without them." The man reasoned.  
"... alright. We can do that."  
"It's not that easy. The fucker who rules this place is pretty damn tight. If you piss him off, who knows what he'll do."  
Audrey was silent for a second.  
"He can hear you from far away. Smell you even, too. He keeps a chainsaw beside his stupid-ass spinning chair."

"How do we get through him? There's gotta be someway." Josh asked.

"Chances are, when you start the fire, he'll probably make an appearance if it gets out of hand. Then you could probably steal them, and get the walls free."

"Getting into that building is a whole different story. Everyone watching."

"...... Josh is a small."

The boy's heartbeat began to kick up.

"He could probably get in without anyone noticing if he tried hard enough." Audrey suggested.

Tyler looked at the still boy, who's expression was mortified.

"......"

  
Josh was literally begging through his eyes,  
 _'Don't do this.'_

 

Tyler opened his mouth to speak.  
"You can do this, Josh. We believe in you. You're the only one who can make this happen." The girl said, her voice sharp and frightening.  
Josh took a shaky breathe as he watched Tyler give her a weird look.  
"I-...I... n-no way... I can't do that.." josh sputtered out.  
"It's your choice. If you don't want to do it, then you don't have to." Tyler said calmly.  
"If you don't do it, how're we gonna get out?" Audrey hissed at Tyler, whispering even.  
".... we can figure something out, right..?" Tyler said, eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.  
"I doubt that. I really do." She said, directed at Josh.  
Josh's itty bitty hands timidly touched fingers as he bit his bottom lip in anxiousness.

".... then... t-then maybe..." Josh mumbled.  
Tyler glanced at the boy.  
".... maybe I could try...? I dunno.."  
Josh was quiet again.

"... when will we start...? And... what will you two do while waiting for me..?" The boy couldn't calm his heart down. He was shaking right there on the spot.  
What if he was caught?  
What would happen to him..?  
He didn't want to even think, much less experience it.

"... are you sure?"

"....... no."

 

 

 

"Audrey would set up the fire, and I'd have to blend in with the other guards. I can assist Josh if he's going to get the keys, but I can't go in there myself. It's uncanny."  
Josh was tapping his feet nervously against the floor as he sat on the edge.  
"I have a few matches. Is there gasoline somewhere?" Audrey asked, leaning her head on her hand.  
Tyler nodded, looking over at the nervous boy.  
"Cool. We can figure out the rest another time. I want to explore this place some more. If I change my mind for setting up a fire, I'll tell you."

She got up, and left.

  
Tyler gently pulled the boy up into his lap, letting him rest his head against his chest.  
Tyler let his cheek sit on Josh's head.

"... you okay?"

"......." Josh didn't respond.

  
"... it's your choice, baby. I'll give you time. I understand if you're afraid."

".... I... I dunno.."

 

".. what do you think...?"

"I can't decide that for you. But.. I'll try my best to protect you, if it makes you feel any better."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment if you read this, I'll be so happy.


	37. Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not an actual chapter, just a little note idk if you’re still here but here we go

Hi,

im back,

 

so in the the end I think I obviously decided that I didn’t want to finish this,

frankly im kinda embarrassed by it.

the concept is edgy, idk, just don’t wanna continue it anymore.

im sorry if you actually really liked it, but I’m gonna do something new.

ive given up on writing, now I only do art, and that’s my main focus :)

 

but the only only reason I’m still back is because I wanna write one more thing.

less edgy,

a little more of something that sounds fun and not pressuring.

i hate breaking promises, but I’m not sure if I’ll actually write this one either, 

its just stuff from my head.

so yeah

heres a little note.

 

was this written last year or smth ? Oh yikes 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all, if you enjoyed this first chapter, please leave a comment! Those mean the most to be, because they keep me motivated to keep writing. Any comment means the most to me, I'd love to see what you think. :)


End file.
